Job Discussion Forums

[mitsui]

Then you could live in Hawaii as a compromise since there are many Japanese people there. The problem would be in you getting a job and your wife would have to travel by bus.

[rxk22]

[mitsui]

I may go back to the US this year.

I know one teacher who had a tough time in either Kansas or Missouri since his wife could not stand living there, so they headed back to Japan.

I have heard of many wives who do not want to live outside Japan.

My concern is the time it takes to get a green card and what my wife would do. I think it is easier for Japanese to find work in Oahu, partly due to the demand for people who are bilingual, whether working in business, tourism, or doing interpreting or translation.

There is opportunity in Hawaii in teaching K-12 but I hear bad things about schools there.

[Vince]

I've considered Hawaii. It's very expensive, but probably my Plan B.

[jmatt]

[timothypfox]

I have a friend who had a son with aspergers who moved from Japan back to New York City because there was poor educational programs resources and programs for his son in TOKYO!

Also, with regards to marital difficulties and speaking from experience with 2 failed marriages to Japanese women - changing country doesn't fix problems in a marriage. Changing country complicates problems I think.

PM me if you want to hear me cynically rant more about that - probably you don't - but my advice for you is to stay put, and take care of the excellent educational resources available where you are for your son. You will not find anything like them in Japan.

[mitsui]

Work in Hawaii is available through Teach for America.
Pay does suck the first year and certification has to be paid for.
You can choose either Honolulu or the Big Island.

I knew a teacher from Virginia and he tried teaching in Honolulu, but later quit and then just worked at a furniture store. I think his problem was dealing with low motivated students. I think Hawaii is near the bottom in educational rankings and in students going on to university.

So work is available, but because people quit teaching.

Frankly in Hawaii, people who know Japanese and English can do better.

[Vince]

[mitsui]

So my friend pulled his son out of an international school in Yokohama because
a) the English teaching was bad and
b) they did not have a program to help his son with autism and aspergers

So that is why he decided it was better to live in the US, where public schools were better. In Japan, kids are not trained to be independent.

International schools are expensive.
In the past the American School was cheaper but now it must be at least 3 million a year.

[mspxlation]

how about some family vacations in Japan, and I must emphasize, family vacations with all of you, not just your wife and son?

Japan has not yet signed the international agreement on child custody, and there have been many cases (I have translated documents for some of them) in which a Japanese parent has taken a child on a "vacation" to Japan and then refused to come back or even to let the non-Japanese parent see the child.

This may be a danger, since your wife is obviously unhappy in the States. How about moving to a place that has 1) a large Japanese community, 2) good public transportation (so your wife can get around easily without driving), and 3) good programs for children with Asperger's? Large cities on the West Coast and some parts of New Jersey within commuting distance of New York City would qualify.

[Sherri]

Hi, I live and teach ESL in Hawaii on the Big Island. I lived in Japan for 14 years and have 2 kids, both born there. You can get work on Oahu (being the most likely) if you have an MA in TESL/TEFL at a community college or private school. If you just have a cert, maybe only at the private language schools.
Check
http://hawaiitesol.wildapricot.org/

But you'd be in the US, so you could work anywhere, and have more opportunities. And for your wife, a great potential for finding work in a Japanese speaking office, and to find Japanese speaking friends.

As for schools, I think there are some good schools here, and some great teachers. It is a partnership between the parents and the teachers. There are private schools to choose from, but look around and you can find some good DOE schools too. Almost all kids are hapa here, so your son would fit right in.

Just my opinion, but I would not move back to Japan. Your problems with your wife will still be the same, and for your son only worse because the schools there will not be able to deal with your son.

[Solar Strength]

Returning to Japan is a terrible idea.

So, since you're asking for free advice, this is what I have to say.

Get a divorce. Kick your wife loose, let the kid go with her, but let them go. Stay in the U.S. and if she decides to return to Japan you can always visit. If you have problems now in the States, they'd only be magnified exponentially by taking up residence in Japan.

There is no future in Japan for you as a TEFL teacher. You'd be walking from one hell into another. Seriously, be warned. The situation here is terrible for TEFL work. Moving to Japan under your current circumstances would be hell for you. It would get old and get bad fast.

[PO1]

Hi Sherri,

I've actually been thinking of a move to Hawaii for quite some time also. I'm basically hoping to work in Japan a couple of more years and then move back to the US. I was thinking Washington state primarily, but Hawaii has entered my mind more than once.

Would you mind if I PMed you some questions about Hawaii?

Vince: I know being in your situation is rough. Have you talked extensively to your wife about what she wants to do? Is Japan her only choice? If you're going to come to a compromise, I'd suggest Hawaii as others have. At least then she'll have some chance to find more Japanese friends and possibly find some kind of work.