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1st Sgt Welsh
Joined: 13 Dec 2010 Posts: 946 Location: Bandar Seri Begawan, Brunei
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Posted: Mon May 19, 2014 9:38 am Post subject: |
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skarper wrote: |
My father died at 66 after only couple of years retirement from a job he had hated all his life - though TBH I think it wasn't much worse than most jobs - jobs are just no fun to do day in day out for 40 years.
That's why I teach English. It is as far from working for a living as I can get. It is still work of course but it is not irksome.
You can be lazy and get by on very little effort while spending your energy on something else you enjoy - or you can put more into teaching and get more out of it. In Vietnam you can work part time and still get by - which is useful.
I don't expect to live to a ripe old age - in many ways I don't want to. I'd rather enjoy life in my 40s-50s-60s than worry about my 70s and 80s.
Maybe that's foolish and the ants will doubtless tut tut at my grasshopper lifestyle. So be it. |
Couldn't agree more skarper and sorry to hear about your father!
I used to run in the rat race as well and I can honestly say the best thing about it was leaving it. I know plenty of people still working their tails off back in Oz and, whilst I may envy their car, their bank balance and their house, I sure as hell don't envy their lifestyle or their demanding, high-stress jobs! Besides, so many of them get to the point where they are working so hard that they don't really have the time and leisure to properly enjoy their success. I know it's a cliche, but I don't see a hell of a lot of upside to being the richest corpse in the graveyard. |
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EmGee
Joined: 14 Mar 2014 Posts: 38
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Posted: Tue May 20, 2014 4:29 pm Post subject: |
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I won't say money is a low priority for me but I've never been very tolerant of jobs I hate. Luckily I've been able to find jobs I enjoyed and I stay only as long as I like them. Within reason, of course, because I don't just walk out because I had a bad day. More like several bad months and I'll start looking for something else. My maximum time working for one company has been 3 years.
These days, having decent savings now allows me to quit and spend up to 6 months to find a new gig. |
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skarper
Joined: 12 Oct 2006 Posts: 477
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Posted: Tue May 20, 2014 8:17 pm Post subject: |
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Yeah - saving some reserve cash and having low overheads is a huge help in avoiding workplace misery.
It can be difficult if you marry a local and all kinds of expectations appear.
A note on dating Vietnamese women is that they don't as a rule 'date'. A few do of course but it is not normal yet - I actually think it never will be.
Vietnamese women expect to get married - that is the unspoken understanding on her part if you see the same girl more than a few times and especially if you meet any family or friends.
Vietnamese [Asian?] culture has a solution for men too young/too old/too poor to get married - which is prostitution. Often if you find someone willing to 'date' there will be an element of 'compensation' involved.
But not always - times are changing and especially in the bigger cities where women are living away from family and friends they can do what they want.
But go careful. Don't break any hearts/ruin any lives and equally don't get ensnared and have your bank balance looted. |
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EmGee
Joined: 14 Mar 2014 Posts: 38
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Posted: Wed May 21, 2014 12:45 pm Post subject: |
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Thanks for the advice, Skarper. I've been fleeced a couple of times so I'm really wary of women with solely financial intentions.
I suppose it could be tricky for me in Vietnam because I'm not really looking to get married but I would like a long term relationship. That sounds hard to find. Maybe I'll encourage my Mongolian girlfriend to join me, or at least have some conjugal visits.
Another option is expats from other Asian countries. I believe Philippinas work as teachers in Vietnam, don't they? |
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bentanddisfunctional
Joined: 19 Oct 2010 Posts: 85
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Posted: Wed May 21, 2014 2:45 pm Post subject: |
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I believe Philippinas work as teachers in Vietnam, don't they?[/quote]
Yes- and some quite fit ones too,the ethnic chinese ones anyway.
If you find one without a child let me know |
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skarper
Joined: 12 Oct 2006 Posts: 477
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Posted: Wed May 21, 2014 4:02 pm Post subject: |
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I would advise anyone to be totally up front about marriage intentions when dating Vietnamese women - they will make assumptions that may be totally different from what you mean.
If you are willing to consider older women who may have been divorced and may or may not have children already then I think a long term relationship without getting married may be more achievable.
But this is Asia - live is harsh especially on women. If you do manage to date a Vietnamese girl for a while and don't get married she may or may not be a prostitute when you date her but there is a good chance she will be afterwards.
We should all think about that before we 'dabble'. |
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EmGee
Joined: 14 Mar 2014 Posts: 38
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Posted: Thu May 22, 2014 8:12 am Post subject: |
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Shame about the dating scene. I guess I'll stick with expat dating or be brutally honest with any viet females. But, in my experience, telling a woman that you're honestly just interested in dating makes them just work harder to try to change your mind. |
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JoeKing
Joined: 30 Apr 2008 Posts: 519
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Posted: Sat May 24, 2014 4:24 pm Post subject: |
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skarper wrote: |
I would advise anyone to be totally up front about marriage intentions when dating Vietnamese women - they will make assumptions that may be totally different from what you mean.
If you are willing to consider older women who may have been divorced and may or may not have children already then I think a long term relationship without getting married may be more achievable.
But this is Asia - live is harsh especially on women. If you do manage to date a Vietnamese girl for a while and don't get married she may or may not be a prostitute when you date her but there is a good chance she will be afterwards.
We should all think about that before we 'dabble'. |
skarper wrote: |
But go careful. Don't break any hearts/ruin any lives and equally don't get ensnared and have your bank balance looted. |
You're a good egg, skarper! |
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