Job Discussion Forums

[mark_in_saigon]

I have been down these same roads, both in the west and over here, and seen many others who have made these trips.

It is easy to make some impolite generalization, which may actually be true in a majority of cases. But true or not, I think what is even more important is this:

Living in a different nation/culture/environment changes us. Us who come over here. Those who go from here to there. Maybe it does not always change us for the worse, but from what I see, even if the relationship was entered into for all the right reasons (which is probably not the majority of cases), still, that change is usually fatal. It is a question of relative values. Ever notice how special you seem over here (outside of District 1, anyway)? Of course, we all have been mobbed by schoolchildren. Oh, the foreigner, the foreigner! Imagine the reversing of values when you bring your partner to the west. Partner's value skyrockets, yours plummets. It is human nature to take advantage of those new values.

[VietCanada]

I have to comment on the 'special' remark. I've been hearing that since 2000 when I first found Dave's and I was working in Korea. It was a favourite of trolls along with the 'working in McDonald's' and 'Tim Horton's su x' posts. In all the time since I have never, ever met anyone who thought they were Michael Jackson just because some children made a fuss over them. Never. Not one.

Most teachers I have met and meet to this day seem to hate that the kids are always screaming hello at them.

I don't, as a rule, but for the record I don't like the way some kids seem to use a mocking tone or scream it as loud as they can.

I just can't imagine any reality where my VN wife would mobbed by adoring masses just because she has 'exotic eyes' or whatever.

When we go to Canada we will be living in a city with a VN community. That way my wife will have access to other's experiences, her food and culture if she desires.

[VietCanada]

I also need to comment on your 'marry for the right reasons' remark. What are the right reasons? What are the wrong reasons? Please elaborate.

I have met and read on this board about many married relationships over the years. I can't even begin to calculate how many I've encountered or read about in my own country.

I am unable to figure out how anyone could come to the conclusion that marriages with foreign nationals are entered into for the 'wrong reason' any more than marriages within one's own culture or country.

Inter-cultural marriages and relationships are well documented to be difficult. The American south west for example. But I don't see how that can be extrapolated to include one spouse being from a different country altogether.

This idea of getting married for the wrong reasons is very disturbing. It Sounds very tea partyish. Foreign women marring to gain access to America or Canada type of BS.

Yeah it happens but not enough to fear monger over it.

[mark_in_saigon]

I have never pondered what it would be like to be Michael Jackson. More directly to the point, the foreigner can find a very nice partner here, regardless of his age, if he has some snap. Back home, same guy, his choices would be very limited. Over here, you are a catch. You take your partner to the U.S., your values reverse. She is the catch, your value has declined exponentially. Maybe you cannot imagine it, but in the U.S., this is the reality.

Matter of fact, this happened in my life. I worked for a big company who did not notice the middle aged people who did a great job (I was one of those guys). My much younger Asian partner came through looking for a job one day (same company), and she was actually mobbed going down the hallways. She was there seeking employment, and she was damn sure noticed. She worked about one day, the work was too hard for her, but they called her pleading with her to come back. Sickening. Maybe similar to how the VN teachers feel about the way the foreign teachers are paid.

I was trying to be subtle, so used the idea of the kids noticing you, not trying to rile up the Michael Jackson fan club.

[VietCanada]

[mark_in_saigon]

[VietCanada]

[mark_in_saigon]

Wow. Hate? Trailer park trash? You really are twisting things up. I worked there for 9 years, she worked there for 1 day. They jumped out of their chairs to hire her. They did not care a whit about the guys who worked day in day out. I tried to get her to work there, she had her chance, but it was too much like...work. Hate? What is up with you?

Look, I think no matter what I say, you have some idea about trolling or whatever your agenda is, so I am just going to let you take it from here.

[lexpat]

[VietCanada]

[Spelunker]

Having read all these replies, I am still pretty sure one would not get shot by radicalized islamist in viet, nor beheaded by one in say Saigon, as has happened in London. And western women aren't all that great....so I'd take my chances teaching english in Viet, over being on the dole and living in crappy housing/squatting in expensive and unsafe London, end of!!

[ExpatLuke]

[Spelunker]

Fair points, but!, notice the exclamation mark , but if I may defend myself.

I am not running from my home country, Anglia, as I am not in it even now.

[ExpatLuke]

Traffic accidents are the number 1 killer. Saying you won't drive a motorbike is a little naive, imo. Saigon and Hanoi do have decent bus systems, so that is an option. But if you rely on busses to get around everywhere, you're going to hate it very quickly. Your only other options are taxis which get expensive very fast. Or motorbike taxis, which is just the same as driving your own bike, except you have less control, less access to helmets, and possibly get some dude who's been drinking all morning driving you around. Walking isn't realistic either in 40+ degree weather, and the fact that motorbike always hop up on the sidewalks to get around the traffic.

The number 2 killer would probably be mosquito borne illnesses like dengue fever and various others.

Number 3 would be illnesses from eating foods which haven't been cooked properly or prepared in sanitary conditions.

So as you can see, you definitely have trade-offs.

[piglet44]