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Pining for Saudi
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waltgomez



Joined: 03 Jul 2014
Posts: 93

PostPosted: Fri Jul 13, 2018 3:27 pm    Post subject: Pining for Saudi Reply with quote

Just finished a contract and am on a long vacation in the Philippines. It's paradise here, I can have all the booze and all the dates I want, but I miss Saudi Arabia!

I really do. I was dying to leave it but once I left it, it was like a rug was pulled from under me.

I miss the stability, the strong infrastructure, the money, the predictability of the next day. I miss the cleanliness, the constant flow of money, the general feel of abundance and well-being.

I miss the trips to Bahrain, the glitzy skyscrapers there, the good mood of the people.

Have I gone insane? I'm supposed to be feeling liberated, but I'm not.

Has anyone felt the same way? Or should I see a shrink?
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Foo_Fighters_Dave



Joined: 09 Dec 2016
Posts: 162

PostPosted: Fri Jul 13, 2018 3:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Didn't you have issues sending home to your home country and work at a low paying job? Are you being sarcastic?

If you want to come back, apply to jobs. Make sure you get an Igama so the problems that plagued you before wont happen again.
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waltgomez



Joined: 03 Jul 2014
Posts: 93

PostPosted: Fri Jul 13, 2018 4:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well now I have no job, not even a low paying one.

And I no longer have the issues sending money.

And yes, I am applying and I am getting offers.

Iqama is slavery. You can't leave while it's being processed. You can't leave without an exit reentry visa. The only inconvenience is that you can't have a bank account. So, just go to Bahrain.

But I am just surprised at the "feeling". The emotion.

I was supposed to feel good, no? How can people like Saudi? I apparently liked it.
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nomad soul



Joined: 31 Jan 2010
Posts: 11385
Location: The real world

PostPosted: Fri Jul 13, 2018 8:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

waltgomez wrote:
I miss the stability, the strong infrastructure, the money, the predictability of the next day. I miss the cleanliness, the constant flow of money, the general feel of abundance and well-being.
....
Well now I have no job, not even a low paying one.

And yes, I am applying and I am getting offers.

You're likely experiencing culture shock. It's normal. (Or you're worried that you're spending too much money in the Philippines and don't yet have a job lined up.)
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EFL Educator



Joined: 17 Jul 2013
Posts: 974
Location: Cape Town

PostPosted: Fri Jul 13, 2018 11:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

To the OPPORTUNITY

I too miss my home in South Africa...but I enjoy living in Dhahran and partying in Bahrain every weekend...with money! Very Happy
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sheikhitnow



Joined: 29 Dec 2017
Posts: 32

PostPosted: Wed Jul 18, 2018 4:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I've never met anyone in ten years of Saudi experience ('92-96 and 2009-15) who pines for the Tragic Kingdom. It is truly the most culturally and geographically sterile country I've ever been in, and I've lived in quite a few over a period of 40 (noncontinuous) years outside my home country. And this is not to mention a horrible and frustrating infrastructure, and the pigheaded and rude behavior of strangers in public--although when Saudis know you personally, they're very gracious except when you get a nasty class. The OP must have his/her reasons, and no doubt must have had a good employer.
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hash



Joined: 17 Dec 2014
Posts: 447
Location: Wadi Jinn

PostPosted: Thu Jul 19, 2018 8:42 pm    Post subject: Re: Pining for Saudi Reply with quote

waltgomez wrote:
I miss Saudi Arabia! I really do. Have I gone insane?

Your words betray a common ailment often suffered by ex-KSAers. The technical word is RECIDIVISM...
I call it PRISONITIS. It is most often seen in ex-prisoners and members of the military.

It would take me too long to explain all this to you.....and I'm not really "qualified" to make a true diagnosis
of your condition or give you advice.

It's best if you go on-line and check this out for yourself. A good article I found on the subject appears in the URL below.

Good luck.


http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/crime/2015/10/why_do_so_many_prisoners_end_up_back_in_prison_a_new_study_says_maybe_they.html


.
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nomad soul



Joined: 31 Jan 2010
Posts: 11385
Location: The real world

PostPosted: Fri Jul 20, 2018 12:15 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Not even close, hash. Apples-n-oranges. Rolling Eyes
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hash



Joined: 17 Dec 2014
Posts: 447
Location: Wadi Jinn

PostPosted: Fri Jul 20, 2018 5:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

ADDENDUM:

With regards my last post re “recidivism”, I should mention a related phenomenon, namely the so-called “Stockholm Syndrome” wherein a prisoner (ESL teacher) forms a bond with his captors (employer) such that the prisoner emulates the captor to a remarkable degree, taking on both the captor’s good and bad qualities. (In the famous case of Patty Hearst, the prisoner went so far as to join her captors in their criminal activities.)

See: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stockholm_syndrome

(Of course, both Stockholm Syndrome and recidivism fall within extensive linear limits and it’s difficult to ascertain where they intersect or where a particular individual could be placed.

No doubt, there are “mild” cases and more deranged examples of these syndromes sometimes verging on lunacy and only
a medically qualified “professional” can speak with authority on these issues.)

Having said that, I have known several former KSA teachers who simply could not adjust to life outside KSA and went to extraordinary lengths to return to the Kingdom. Some were unable to do so and I never heard from them again.



.
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sheikhitnow



Joined: 29 Dec 2017
Posts: 32

PostPosted: Sun Jul 22, 2018 12:41 am    Post subject: Pining Reply with quote

Stockholm Syndrome sums it up fairly well for those expats who aren't able to achieve or maintain a healthy balance between knowing where they are physically present for their jobs and where the real world is. The real world certainly isn't the Tragic Kingdom. Ways to achieve that balance are to have a half-decent employer with a great salary; take the odd Dubai or Bahrain weekend when you can; be philosophical and thankful for that salary (and in my lucky case, getting to knock off at 12:30-1 pm daily and getting a three-day weekend once a month) and take full advantage of the international vacations
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dragonpiwo



Joined: 04 Mar 2013
Posts: 1609
Location: Berlin

PostPosted: Sun Jul 22, 2018 6:15 am    Post subject: Hmmm Reply with quote

I must admit and my wife has noticed it, there is a kind of bond between some of the ex-Libya expats. We know what we suffered, the loneliness, the shear snafudness of the place, the toll it took on people whose marriages broke up, who became dependent on homebrew to get through it and those who lost the plot a bit. The feeling is akin to having gone through a war together and some of us did. Many had little choice due to past experiences.
However, in my opinion, what such jobs gave us was financial stability and some sort of ability to plan the next year or so. Returning to the world of EFL in Europe or some other such place is a financial catastrophe and more so if you're over 40. It means starting from scratch again at a time of your life when you want to be slowing down. Employers love young, gullible, inexperienced singers and dancers not old hacks. Some of us are lucky and have a substantial financial cushion but there are others and I've met many, who did 20 odd years in the desert and left with nothing. Such people are screwed. Just getting back into the 'system' ie tax, pension contributions etc etc is nigh impossible.
I understand the OP's feelings. I had to work in Poland for a few months after I left Libya in August 2014. It was dreadful. In the end, I took some hours with Empik and got a few privates. My students at Empik worked in local companies and were over-the-moon with my teaching but I had to get a lawyer to 'persuade' Empik to actually pay me. I got paid after 3 months and resigned immediately. In the Gulf and North Africa, I've always been paid on the dot. We shouldn't take such things for granted.
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Lord T



Joined: 07 Jul 2015
Posts: 285

PostPosted: Sun Jul 22, 2018 10:17 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's a good place to save money that will help you/your family to have a better standard of living. It makes sense for a younger (40-65) healthy man/woman to be there.

However, if you are 65+, in poor health, have no living relatives, but have a house in your home country and a huge bank account; and yet you still feel the need to be there, then I would suggest you spend some of your money on the services of a good psychoanalyst.

Such people exist, and they are an example to all of us of what can go wrong when people push it a little too far - remember, health is wealth.
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BajaLaJaula



Joined: 25 Jan 2007
Posts: 267

PostPosted: Wed Aug 01, 2018 6:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Some are addicted to the stress. I missed it once I left. I guess it has to do with the adrenaline, cortisone, or some hormone that courses through you body when you are stressed and in a fight or flight situation.
I found that most of the work situations were like this for me. The constants demands, threats, and impossible expectations and deadlines that the Saudi employers would make.
The work environment was always hyper stressful, and usually due to their own incompetence. After many years of learning to survive the stress I must have developed a penchant for the stress hormone that my body was producing to deal with it all.
I went back several times and still miss the "good old days." But it is definitely a young man's game. I am much happier now making a little less money but not having to deal with the chaos that is and was Saudi Arabia.
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Londonlover



Joined: 09 Mar 2006
Posts: 90
Location: London

PostPosted: Fri Aug 03, 2018 7:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

BajaLaJaula wrote:
Some are addicted to the stress. I missed it once I left. I guess it has to do with the adrenaline, cortisone, or some hormone that courses through you body when you are stressed and in a fight or flight situation.
I found that most of the work situations were like this for me. The constants demands, threats, and impossible expectations and deadlines that the Saudi employers would make.
The work environment was always hyper stressful, and usually due to their own incompetence. After many years of learning to survive the stress I must have developed a penchant for the stress hormone that my body was producing to deal with it all.
I went back several times and still miss the "good old days." But it is definitely a young man's game. I am much happier now making a little less money but not having to deal with the chaos that is and was Saudi Arabia.

Is this for real ???!!! - actually missing extreme stress and being addicted to extreme stress????
Surely such comments insult all those who have left or been forced to have left Saudi due to nervous breakdowns.
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Londonlover



Joined: 09 Mar 2006
Posts: 90
Location: London

PostPosted: Fri Aug 03, 2018 8:21 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Or is this just an excuse/justification/blotting out exercise to comfort those in misery?
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