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This is the life we have chosen

 
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The K Dog



Joined: 27 Feb 2003
Posts: 24
Location: Paris

PostPosted: Thu Apr 17, 2003 5:16 pm    Post subject: This is the life we have chosen Reply with quote

People,
Has any American out there with an advanced degree in TESOL balked at the idea of going back to the home country for fear of going from a nice university post abroad with its short hours, relatively good salary, free housing, paid summers off, lack of PC directives in the lecture hall from the higher orders in exchange for going back home and taking a chance that you will be a mere adjunct at some community college, spending time on the freeway, with no benefits, low salary, intermittent hopes of contract renewal semester after semester? This is the situation I am in right now. My ex-girlfriend (in America) has been contacting me and talking about reconciliation just at the time when I am sending out CVs to various colleges in the far east, the Pacific and Turkey. So, it means follow path one, which is to get back with her, go back to the States, become an adjunct as I have an M.Ed in Postsecondary TESOL, and not be lonely or go abroad as one of my friends has done and get the whole package. If I take option two I could look like a total egocentric putting job first, if I take option one I am banking that things will work out with her, but I am going to a place I only want to be in because of her. It's a sticky situation. What do you think? Be the bachelor in the Pacific with his free bungalow near the beach, high salary, low stress, but lonely as a mountain dwelling hermit or be with someone with whom I am compatible in most ways, but miserable career-wise; granted it's no guarantee that I will be miserable in regards to work in the States, but I hear so many stories, and have come to the conclusion that it's better in other countries than it is in America in regards to getting full-time, high paying TESOl university work. Anyone been there before?
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shirley



Joined: 10 Jan 2003
Posts: 45
Location: Italy

PostPosted: Thu Apr 17, 2003 10:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi K-Dog, The life of an adjunct in the US is hell, difficult to get hours and even when you do there is little money left to live, usually without health insurance. Most adjuncts I knew in the US lived for years without medical care because they had no insurance. If you are lucky enough to find insurance, the cost is extremely high. It is possible to find a full-time job in the US from where you are. When I was living in Italy and wanted to return to the US, I did a mass mailout to all the universities I knew of and got lucky and one replied and they paid for my interview trip and then for my relocation. Since you have to live in AZ, it will limit your opportunities. I read an article on the tremendous shortage of public school teachers now in the US, I think AZ was one state that is recruiting, you may check that out as the public schools offer good pay and benefits. You'll have to take some courses to get certified, but the schools usually will give you time to do that. Returning home, where you don't really want to be, just to renew a once failed relationship and working a job you hate, doesn't sound very productive. Love is patient, find a good job from where you are and go into the relationship without the job problems. Just my opinion, of course.
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shirley



Joined: 10 Jan 2003
Posts: 45
Location: Italy

PostPosted: Thu Apr 17, 2003 10:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

K-Dog, here's a website you can check out: www.recruitingteachers.org It connects you to all the state departments of education. Good luck.
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johnslat



Joined: 21 Jan 2003
Posts: 12862
Location: Santa Fe, New Mexico, USA

PostPosted: Fri Apr 18, 2003 4:02 am    Post subject: Heads or tails Reply with quote

Dear K-Dog,
Whenever I'm on the horns of a dilemma, I always flip a coin: heads, do this; tails, do that. If, upon seeing the result, I say to myself, " Hmm, OK, 2 out of 3 ", then I know what I really want to do, deep down. You've got pros and cons on both sides - and no one can tell what the future will hold either way. All you CAN do is try to make sure you're following your deepest inclination.
Regards,
John
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zakiah25



Joined: 09 Feb 2003
Posts: 155
Location: Oman

PostPosted: Fri Apr 18, 2003 4:37 am    Post subject: pros and cons Reply with quote

Whenever I'm confronted by a difficult situation, I usually take a large sheet of paper. On one side, I list all the positives that I can think of, and the negative on the other. Once completed, I add the totals of each side to see which one comes out in front. This is generally a reasonable indicator.
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johnslat



Joined: 21 Jan 2003
Posts: 12862
Location: Santa Fe, New Mexico, USA

PostPosted: Fri Apr 18, 2003 4:50 am    Post subject: Logical Reply with quote

Dear zakiah25,
An admirable, and very logical, way of handling such a situation. But you know, I'm not so sure logic's what's needed here. I think this may be more a matter of the emotions. And when that's the case, all the lists you might make won't really get to " the heart of the matter ".
Regards,
John
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Kent F. Kruhoeffer



Joined: 22 Jan 2003
Posts: 2129
Location: 中国

PostPosted: Fri Apr 18, 2003 8:58 am    Post subject: have your cake and eat it too ? Reply with quote

Hello The K Dog:

I've read your post twice now, as well as the replies that follow, and no one has suggested what I think is the obvious solution:

Why not ask your girlfriend to pack her bags and join you on your world-wide teaching adventure? I know MANY people back in the States who would jump at the opportunity to live for a year or 2 abroad, and with your qualifications, you'll certainly be earning enough to support the both of you.

The fact that she has an American passport means that getting her a visa should be a breeze. Maybe she could find an EFL job in the same city with you ... and the 2 of you could rake in the big bucks together?

Besides all of that, rekindling a 'cooled-off' romance in some exotic city of Asia sure beats the hell out of going back home to the old and familiar, right? Or am I missing something here?

Have your cake and eat it too, as they say. Cool That would be my first choice, were I in your shoes at the moment. If she said "no", I'd probably flip a coin and hope it landed on the 'teach-EFL-abroad' side.

Regards,
kENt

PS: That bungalow-on-the-beach image you painted got me thinking: Hell, if she says "no", I'll go with you! I can't cook worth a damn, but I can order a "Happy Meal" at McDonald's in 8 different languages. Twisted Evil
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Ben Round de Bloc



Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Posts: 1946

PostPosted: Fri Apr 18, 2003 12:52 pm    Post subject: Bungalow near the beach Reply with quote

Quote:
Has any American out there with an advanced degree in TESOL balked at the idea of going back to the home country for fear of going from a nice university post abroad with its short hours, relatively good salary, free housing, paid summers off, lack of PC directives in the lecture hall from the higher orders in exchange for going back home and taking a chance that you will be a mere adjunct at some community college, spending time on the freeway, with no benefits, low salary, intermittent hopes of contract renewal semester after semester?
- The K Dog


Me! Me! I have! I don't have a relatively good salary, free housing, tenure, or paid summers off, but the rest fits my current situation.

I came to Mexico with the idea of spending 3 to 6 months here, mainly to get that teaching-abroad experience on my CV, and then return to the U.S. to look for the type of job you described. That was about 8 years ago, and I'm still here in Mexico. Go back to the States to teach in a high school? No way! I did that for nearly 20 years. Find a good secure job teaching ESL in a nice little community college somewhere? Not likely to happen.

As for your ex-girlfriend, if you two are compatible with each other in most ways, why is she your ex? I'm not saying that to be funny. Are you looking for a reconciliation because you're feeling lonely at the moment or because you really think there's a chance to rebuild the relationship? Do you really think you could give the relationship a fair shot while living in a place where you don't want to live and working at a job you hate?

I kind of like Kent's idea of inviting her to join you in your adventure. That bungalow near the beach in the Pacific, low stress, and all . . . hmmm. If she doesn't take you up on your offer, forget Kent's alternate suggestion. You'd get tired of Happy Meals day after day. I'll go with you, and I'm a good cook.

Best wishes!
Smile
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Kent F. Kruhoeffer



Joined: 22 Jan 2003
Posts: 2129
Location: 中国

PostPosted: Sat Apr 19, 2003 3:53 am    Post subject: KeNt's LaW Reply with quote

Dear Ben (a.k.a. Tim from Chihuahua):

kEnt'S laW: "You never get tired of a Happy Meal." Razz
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