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Are conversation lessons paying for friendship/therapy?
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What's your attitude to conversation lessons?
Personal issues are where my students have the most to say. Bring it on .
12%
 12%  [ 1 ]
I stear the conversation away from some personal topics It's not professional.
0%
 0%  [ 0 ]
I keep the conversation intellectual. I want intelligent conversation about topics of public interest.
0%
 0%  [ 0 ]
I go with the flow unless I start to feel uncomfortable.
87%
 87%  [ 7 ]
Total Votes : 8

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norwalkesl



Joined: 22 Oct 2009
Posts: 366
Location: Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-China

PostPosted: Sun Oct 25, 2009 11:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
I think I perceive things most clearly on this point. It is a heightened perception that comes from years of having to interview the endless stream, flowing from the Far East, of 'personality' teachers, the wannabe 'cultural ambassadors', and 'friends of learners', knowing that if they were hired, there would be a serious risk of their not being able to finish the contract. Many had been sadly misinformed that their charisma, their putative insight into their culture, their ability to 'connect' with learners was all that was needed to see them through. Naturally, they couldn't see why they were turned down for a job for which they viewed themselves as admirably suited. Even on the very rare occasions when a reason would be provided, they steadfastly held to their views that what they had to offer was what learners really wanted.
\

Just to clarify - you are Stateside and you have interviewed hundreds of 'teachers' from the US who taught as 'personality' teachers, the wannabe 'cultural ambassadors', and 'friends of learners' in Asia, and they now return to the USA and expect to be hired for rigorous teaching positions in the US and Canada?

TIA
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Sashadroogie



Joined: 17 Apr 2007
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 26, 2009 8:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Nope, sorry if I was a touch unclear.

I am based in Europe, and in any school in all the countries I've worked in here, the travelling conversation teacher re-locating from the Far East especially was never a good bet. An interview for a position in my language school ( teaching non-English speakers too), face-to-face or by telephone, was very often a waste of time because these candidates were only very rarely able to demonstrate any concrete teaching skills, like how to teach vocabulary, present grammar, set up a speaking activity, give feedback, correct errors etc. You know, the basics of EFL? They very often didn't even know what these concepts were.

They weren't all from the US, by the way. It was not relevant what nationality they had, only that they all shared the same weaknesses as potential employees. And these were the candidates who had been screened for some basic ESL qualification. Not every candidate was like this - goodness no. There were some excellent teachers who had worked there too. But from what I gather, and this may be a mistaken assumption on my part - I'll stand corrected if so - it seems much more likely that someone, anyone, can be hired by schools in various of the countries in the Far East solely as a pronunciation model or 'conversation coach' or something. And 'personality' seems to be the only so-called ability required.

This simply won't cut it in my neck of the woods.
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spiral78



Joined: 05 Apr 2004
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 26, 2009 8:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I haven't taken the time to read the whole thread, but I'll second what Sashadroogie has just posted: teachers whose sole experience is in Asia often do not demonstrate skills that translate into other teaching contexts.

European students have very different motivations, and different expectations regarding goals of learning, and classroom approaches and methods.

In my own experience working with teachers in Canada and Europe, those with only experience in Asia often find it difficult to move successfully into what is usually a very different job.
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krayola



Joined: 23 Jun 2009
Posts: 38

PostPosted: Mon Oct 26, 2009 12:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

What a fascinating thread!

It's hard to know where to start, but having worked in a 'conversation' school for 15 months I've come across a wide variety of opinions on discussion as a form of learning English.

Some students love the idea that they can share their life with the teacher and fellow students. I encourage them to. The more comfortable students are in the classroom, the more receptive they will be to learning. At the same time I'm wary of the boundaries of privacy and students hold all the power in that regard - if they don't want to discuss something, then fair enough.

If a student wants to talk extensively about a topic (and we've all had those people who could talk for a whole lesson), then I let them. Research actually shows that it's beneficial for students to speak at length. For some this can be a breakthrough moment. Of course prompting and error correction does need to occur from the teacher, but students shouldn't be discouraged from using the language. I also find these chunks of conversation to be an excellent time for assessing student strengths and weaknesses.

As for culture, my students have come to Australia to learn English. Even if we don't consciously discuss culture, it pokes its head in anyway, through the gifts that students bring me, the clothes that they wear, you name it. I do use my interpretation of my culture to make our learning more relevant to our environment though. There are some linguistic features of Aussie English that are unique and need to be brought up.

Lastly, I think teaching qualifications for our profession are completely inadequate. CELTA is a one month course with perhaps six to ten hours prac teaching? Renowned certificate, sure, but how much can a month really teach a newbie? That's a steep learning curve once you get in a real classroom. My primary school degree was four years and over four months of prac teaching. Lots of my course was still hopelessly unprepared when we graduated! So making the transition from *teacher superstar* Asia to Europe is not just a drag because of personality dependent teachers, but also perhaps because they don't know any better.
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gaijinalways



Joined: 29 Nov 2005
Posts: 2279

PostPosted: Mon Oct 26, 2009 1:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sashadroogie posted
Quote:
Yes, I am aware that these things can and are taught. My concern is whether language teachers are really the best for the task. As you yourself have said, the results are dubious at best.


When we're talking about teaching critical thinking and crosscultural matters, I just felt I haven't seen consistent results, regardless of who teaches it, language teachers or otherwise. They are not easy subjects to teach, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try.


Sashadroogie posted
Quote:
However, getting back to the crux of the matter, I repeat my question: can you specify these non-linguistic matters you say are part of our job responsibilites to deal with? Do you think that a situation like that in the OP is really anything we have any business dealing with? I certainly don't. In fact I would go further and say that it takes a peculiar kind of arrogance to assume that we as outsiders could possibly help someone, living in a culture of which we ourselves usually have only the dimmest inkling, with anything other than our stated aim, i.e. language support.


See my above statements. As I said, the two aforementioned matters are a usual in many syllabi for English classes in various departments in Japanese univerisities.

Sashadroogie posted
Quote:
I did understand your offer, by the way. And as you can see I am quite happy to give solid advice online, in my area of expertise, and would recommend not taking my requests as anything other than irony - or sarcasm even.


Noted, and I guess you didn't realize the humor embedded in my reply. A bit ironic, yes Laughing ?

Sashadroogie posted
Quote:
Actually, I understand your point, and agree with you: we do end up doing things beyond our job description. That's reality. However, my point is precisely that certain things are beyond our job description and this seems to be the major bone of contention - some of the other postings indicate that we are in fact obliged to help students with their emotional difficulties, provide therapy, friendship, etc. as this falls within education somehow. I totally refute that, and find it hard to accept that any EFL teacher would ever confuse the role of a language teacher with that of a psychoanalyst.


I don't think anyone was ever talking about this 'depth' of counseling. It seems your idea of professional distance is keeping in character as a linguistic model and language bank only.


Sashadroogie posted
Quote:
Talking about something important that happened in a person's life is fine, but there are obvious limits, and what was described in the OP clearly transgresses them. You have read the OP, haven't you? Do you really think we as teachers should be involved in discussing with an emotionally stricken woman the intimate details of her erstwhile married life? Do you think we need to offer 'creative solutions' to help her work through her issues? Some others apparently think we do. But I shudder at the whole notion and seriously wonder what profession others think they are employed in...


I have to wonder, are you a whirlwind at changing the subject anytime it gets too personal? Do your students have any idea what city you live in or what brand of beer you drink (assuming you drink it, that is), because you're afraid to disclose any personal information?

I think the cyberteachers are here.... Shocked Cool


Sashadroogie posted
Quote:
I am based in Europe, and in any school in all the countries I've worked in here, the travelling conversation teacher re-locating from the Far East especially was never a good bet. An interview for a position in my language school...


Aha.

Sashadroogie posted
Quote:
....were only very rarely able to demonstrate any concrete teaching skills, like how to teach vocabulary, present grammar, set up a speaking activity, give feedback, correct errors etc. You know, the basics of EFL? They very often didn't even know what these concepts were.


That is hard to believe. Even some of the ex-NOVA teachers would know these basic concepts. You haven't been hiring from their 'dead pool', have you?


Sashadroogie posted
Quote:
But from what I gather, and this may be a mistaken assumption on my part - I'll stand corrected if so - it seems much more likely that someone, anyone, can be hired by schools in various of the countries in the Far East solely as a pronunciation model or 'conversation coach' or something. And 'personality' seems to be the only so-called ability required.


Can you pin it down to which countries you're talking about? The Far East is a big area. Yes, I have heard you can be a walking talk recorder in some places, and not just in Asia Confused Cool .



spiral78 posted
Quote:
I haven't taken the time to read the whole thread, but I'll second what Sashadroogie has just posted: teachers whose sole experience is in Asia often do not demonstrate skills that translate into other teaching contexts.


And the kind of teachers you're talking about are...

When I have met university teachers from other countries, I've found the kinds of tasks they design are similar to what we use here. So I do have to wonder ...

spiral78 posted
Quote:
European students have very different motivations, and different expectations regarding goals of learning, and classroom approaches and methods.


That would be expected as their cultural expectations would often govern their learning expectations and approaches. But some of the methods would be similar, espeically if you have students who want more autonomy.

spiral78 posted
Quote:
In my own experience working with teachers in Canada and Europe, those with only experience in Asia often find it difficult to move successfully into what is usually a very different job.


In your experience.... Cool What was the educational environment, universities, language schools, business English classes, other?
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spiral78



Joined: 05 Apr 2004
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 26, 2009 7:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

And the kind of teachers you're talking about are...

For the past 6 years, I have worked in universities: Canada and Europe. The teachers I have interviewed/trained in this context (having previous experience) are not newbies, but have CELTA/equivalent at minimum and related MAs max (no Phds yet...).


The teachers I have worked with who taught in Asian universities (Japan, Korea, and China) have not successfully made the transition to western teaching contexts. I freely admit that the pool of teachers in this category with whom I have worked is small (10-12). But for what it's worth, all that I have known whose primary experience is in Asia have been unsuccessful in the unis where I work.

Our students don't simply want more autonomy: the courses must be focused specifically on what they perceive as their needs: and they HAVE specific needs, linguistically.

To give you an idea of a common picture here: teachers sit a the back of the room and in a 2-hour class, I MAY have as much as 10 minutes of input - if things are going well. If not, as much as a half hour. It's not about teachers, here.
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Sashadroogie



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PostPosted: Mon Oct 26, 2009 8:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh dear, another multi-part quote response. OK, here goes. Bear with me, this might be too deep.

gaijinalways wrote:


When we're talking about teaching critical thinking and crosscultural matters, I just felt I haven't seen consistent results, regardless of who teaches it, language teachers or otherwise. They are not easy subjects to teach, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try.


Especially when 'taught' be EFL teachers who are not qualified or trained , eh?


Quote:
See my above statements. As I said, the two aforementioned matters are a usual in many syllabi for English classes in various departments in Japanese univerisities.


For which departments specifically? For courses that teach their subject through English, or courses that focus primarily on language acquisition? Do you also teach chemistry and mathematics? Do your students already speak a high level of English? Japanese universities can include anything they want on any syllabus. That doesn't make it relevant to language teaching.



Quote:
Noted, and I guess you didn't realize the humor embedded in my reply. A bit ironic, yes Laughing ?


Erm? Is your irony from the same school as Alanis Morrisette?



Quote:
I don't think anyone was ever talking about this 'depth' of counseling. It seems your idea of professional distance is keeping in character as a linguistic model and language bank only.

I have to wonder, are you a whirlwind at changing the subject anytime it gets too personal? Do your students have any idea what city you live in or what brand of beer you drink (assuming you drink it, that is), because you're afraid to disclose any personal information?

I think the cyberteachers are here.... Shocked Cool


I think you yourself were. Didn't you say that it was part of our thing to help students find solutions, be a sounding board, offer generous emotional support? Sounds more therapy than language lesson to me. All that is needed is the couch and some free association to complete the set. Maybe I misunderstood you. Maybe you are often misunderstood. Tell me about your mother while I light my pipe�.

You are not correct in your description of what I view professional distance to be. Not being the centre of attention in my lessons, not getting overly personal with the learners/clients is not unusual in real language teaching. (Learner-centredness, remember?) I'm not afraid to disclose private information when it comes up naturally, but most students are not chomping at the bit to learn everything about their teachers (shock! Gasp!), so I don't impose it either. Only teachers wrapped up in their own ego do that. It doesn't make for effective language learning.

Detachment and distance are also employed in most workplaces. Do you know the intimate details of your line manger's life? Do you want to? What would you think if he/she blurted out some distressing family problem to you while you were trying to work? Maybe some people would offer a hug. Not too many though. And how many of us like it when a fellow teacher brings their bad day into the workplace? Do we think it is great that they feel comfortable enough to impose their bad mood on the rest? Or do we think that they are at best immature, at worst lacking in professionalism? And these are colleagues, not paying clients.







Quote:
Sashadroogie posted
Quote:
I am based in Europe, and in any school in all the countries I've worked in here, the travelling conversation teacher re-locating from the Far East especially was never a good bet. An interview for a position in my language school...


Aha.


Erm...? Have you learnt some key insight into something? That I work in a language school? Enlighten, if you will.



Quote:
That is hard to believe. Even some of the ex-NOVA teachers would know these basic concepts. You haven't been hiring from their 'dead pool', have you?


I grant you that it is indeed very hard to believe that anyone could be so clueless in a classroom, but it is true. Have you not interviewed new staff? You are in for a treat! How they survive so long on the TEFL circuit eludes me, but perhaps they teach cultural awareness or critical thinking to low-level Asian learners?

Worth noting that some of them even had, or claimed they had, American MAs in ESL or linguistics, though it was hard to see this from the pitiful observation episodes they thought were 'awesome lessons'. JET program teachers figured too, but not very highly. And too many Peace Corps types to recount. Very few did anything that the school, DOS, or learners thought was even vaguely approaching teaching. But lots of details about their hometown, their opinions on the shortcomings of their host country, their equally poor opinion on the course books they didn't know how to exploit. So many issues brought into the classroom. So much PARSNIPS. They seemed to think that a personalised lesson meant that they needed to make it 'personal'. Maybe ex-NOVA teachers do too, I wouldn't know.



Quote:
Can you pin it down to which countries you're talking about? The Far East is a big area. Yes, I have heard you can be a walking talk recorder in some places, and not just in Asia Confused Cool .


Sure. Predominantly, China is where they previously worked, presumably because it is so large. And nearly all in universities too - some even used the word 'professor' on their CV. But a respectable number, if that word can be used, also worked in South Korea, Japan and Vietnam.

The 'walking talk recorder' is virtually unknown in Europe. My colleagues who have worked in North Africa and the Near East report the same, but you'd need to check with them.

Anyway, after all that, could you answer the OP? Is what is described there typical of your lessons? What would you do in that situation yourself?

Would you not feel decidedly odd? Would you expect payment for your emotional support? How would you measure your student�s progress in dealing with said issues? The same way that we measure their linguistic progress? How many students do you have? Don�t you give them all equal attention? Have you bottomless reserves of compassion for them all? Do you think they need that? More than language?


Last edited by Sashadroogie on Mon Oct 26, 2009 9:51 pm; edited 2 times in total
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Sashadroogie



Joined: 17 Apr 2007
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 26, 2009 9:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

gaijinalways wrote:
... or what brand of beer you drink (assuming you drink it, that is), because you're afraid to disclose any personal information?



Actually, I have been drunk for most of this thread, though I reckon that despite the addling alcohol, shaky typing, freguent toilet trips and blurry vision, that I still have made more perceptive and more cogent points than the wooliness bereft of critical thought that has been put forward by others in place of logical argument. Maybe that's the beer talking - but it will never reveal it's brand name to anyone on account of it valuing its right to privacy.
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JZer



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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 4:42 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
Sashadroogie posted Quote:
....were only very rarely able to demonstrate any concrete teaching skills, like how to teach vocabulary, present grammar, set up a speaking activity, give feedback, correct errors etc. You know, the basics of EFL? They very often didn't even know what these concepts were.


That is hard to believe. Even some of the ex-NOVA teachers would know these basic concepts. You haven't been hiring from their 'dead pool', have you?


I can see where some of these concepts may be over looked by people who have recently taught in Asia. Part of the problem is some of these things are left out due to the fact people often teach classes in which the student's level of English is very low that detailed descriptions on grammar and giving feedback on lessons would hardly be understood.


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JZer



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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 4:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
gaijinalways wrote:


When we're talking about teaching critical thinking and crosscultural matters, I just felt I haven't seen consistent results, regardless of who teaches it, language teachers or otherwise. They are not easy subjects to teach, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try.


Especially when 'taught' be EFL teachers who are not qualified or trained , eh?



I don't see your connection. Sashadroogie, I do not believe that someone who has studied to become a history education and someone who only studied history would have much difference in their critical thinking skills or ability to get students to think critically about subjects.

Is the teaching of critical thinking skills part of an education class? I have taken several graduate education courses and they were all about the methods for teaching language, such as using visuals when teaching new vocabulary, teaching the four skills, etc.

In my experience nothing was covered about how to teach critical thinking skills.


Last edited by JZer on Tue Oct 27, 2009 12:24 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Sashadroogie



Joined: 17 Apr 2007
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 5:04 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

JZer wrote:


I can see where some of these concepts may be over looked by people who have recently taught in Asia. Part of the problem is some of these things are left out due to the fact people often teach classes in which the student's level of English is very low that detailed descriptions on grammar and giving feedback on lessons would hardly be understood.


Sorry, mate. I and the rest of the skilled EFLers in the world teach zero beginners of all nationalities grammar and vocab as a matter of routine. That is firmly within the job description. These are basic EFL skills. Someone who can't do this has no business in an EFL classroom - and it doesn't matter how much they think they can 'connect' with the learners, because learning probably doesn't occur.
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Sashadroogie



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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 5:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

JZer wrote:


I don't see your connection. Sashadroogie, I do not believe that someone who has studied to become a history and someone who only studied history would have much difference in their critical thinking skills or ability to get students to think critically about subjects.

Is the teaching of critical thinking skills part of an education class? I have taken several graduate education courses and they were all about the mthods for teaching language, such as using visiuals when teaching new vocabulary, teaching the four skills, etc.

In my experience nothing was covered about how to teach critical thinking skills.


Sorry. Maybe I'm not awake yet, but I couldn't catch what you meant exactly. It sounds interesting, but could you clarify it for me? Cheers.
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spiral78



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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 6:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Is the teaching of critical thinking skills part of an education class? I have taken several graduate education courses and they were all about the mthods for teaching language, such as using visiuals when teaching new vocabulary, teaching the four skills, etc.

In my experience nothing was covered about how to teach critical thinking skills



For now, I'm ignoring most of the thread - I will return later in the day when I can concentrate. However, I'll chip in now: critical thinking skills in English are a required component of language training courses in the uni where I taught in Canada, and I address them here in Europe in some courses. Critical thinking in this context is mostly linked to judging bias and opinion in spoken and written texts, so that an L2 reader/listener is less likely to be 'misled' on any level. This applies to real life, obviously, but also to professional and academic contexts.

Anyway, I have several modules of materials focused on critical thinking in my toolkit, and students generally enjoy and get really involved in these lessons...
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fluffyhamster



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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 7:19 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

gaijinalways wrote:
fluffyhamster said
Quote:
That's the danger with private conversation "lessons" especially. If the student or better yet the teacher were honest, they would admit that if somebody can already speak enough English to hold their own in a halfway decent conversation, there isn't really a whole lot linguistically that they can be taught or learn - which obviously leads to the question of why exactly they are paying for the teacher's time.


I disagree. There is no danger, except what you might do with the information.

As to not being able to teach them more linguistically, you must think speaking is a lot easier than I do. Being able to hold your own in conversation about a limited number of topics hardly means that you don't need to study (and hopefully learn) more about that language.


Try telling that to a fluent monomaniac (of the type who has been mentioned in several anecdotes in this thread)! And I did use words like 'if', 'enough' and 'halfway-decent' (i.e. conversation, not rhetorical monologue). I mean, I haven't had many students pay for a little 1-to-1 time if they weren't at least somewhat fluent (even if they were usually a little strange or demanding personality-wise with it) - if they couldn't speak reasonably (in fact, too) "easily", they wouldn't be able to prattle on so, would they! The two often seem to go hand in hand ("unfortunately").

Then, there's what Sashadroogie wrote:
Quote:
Also, I'd say that when some of my more 'needy' students go off on one of their existentialist distribes, they are no more using target language than a farmer 'targets' with his scattergun. Boom boom! Half a dozen phrases and grammatical contructions all fired off at the same time - one of them must be right! They don't respond to 'topic-changing' strategies, as they don't respond to error-correction. Turn-taking is also not an area they want to develop, because it is all about 'me me me'. And as I and others have said before, fair enough. Let them, so long as they pay, I don't care.


Anyway, although I didn't say teaching speaking was easy, many teachers seem to think so, and pass off plain vanilla ELT lessons as some sort of conversational material and methodology (when it and the ensuing interaction clearly isn't). (Me, I have at least the following books on my 'to read or finish reading' pile: Thornbury & Slade's Conversation: From Description to Pedagogy; McCarthy & Carter's Language as Discourse: Perspectives for Language Teaching; and Rod Ellis's Instructed Second Language Acquisition. I've mentioned the first two a few times now, here on the JD forums or over on the TD ones).

Ultimately, to have an interesting rather than just "polite" conversation, the people conversing will at some point need to start getting 'personal', but this can mean many things (such as open, frank, cheeky, fun etc etc) rather than just bringing up problems perhaps best left private (unless discussing problems, likely then increasingly "all the time" once they have been shared and are known, is or would be both people's idea of enjoyment).

Master Shake, regarding your post on page 2 of this thread, maybe something like Bill Johnston's Values in English Language Teaching would make useful reading.

One last thing: I must say that there has been a bit of a rag on teachers in Asia in this thread, but if the sort of teaching that is expected in language schools in the UK at least is anything to aspire to (which it seemed to be held to be still, last time I was looking), then all I can say is that I feel that my decade-plus in Asia was time well spent out of it! At least there I've been able to have and develop some thoughts of my own, without having Headway and Penny Ur (or whatever is now the "most dependable" thing) rammed down my throat by the rather complacent establishment (which actually does very little to help, and a fair bit to hinder, and will only be even remotely concerned and take any "real" notice once the money stops rolling in quite so much for "whatever" reasons).
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Sashadroogie



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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 10:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dear Spiral, thanks for that last contribution. Of course, shame on me! I neglected to consider the skills you referred to, i.e. listening and reading for inference etc., or any area of semantics and pragmatics. These are often described as examples of critical thinking too. But most definitely within the preserve of linguistic concerns, surely? However, as Gaijinalways has cited 'critical-thinking' as a non-linguistic skill taught in his/her classroom I assumed she meant something else - perhaps logical deduction or arithmetic as in GMAT. But apparently that was not what was meant either. Apart from some vague references to cultural issues, I'm still at a loss as to what he/she could have meant.

Fluffyhamster, forgive us if we gave the impression that we were dissing all teachers based in Asia. Absolutely not. The very many posters on this forum alone who regularly contribute sensible input while working in the Far East would be enough to dispel that notion. However, I still maintain, though only on empirical evidence, granted, that there is a higher likelihood of someone totally unskilled or unqualified working for a few years in a language school, or even some form of university, if they are based in the Far East, rather than if they were based anywhere else. I maybe wrong, of course, but that is what I have directly experienced while trying to recruit teachers and interviewing them, with the results that I have already described. There are weak teachers based everywhere, certainly, but I have not very often come across a teacher with experience in Germany or Australia, for example, who simply couldn't figure out how to teach Elementaries how to form past simple questions.

At risk of going off-topic slightly, look at the location of all the posters on this thread. I think that it can be seen that there is a clear trend, based on location, emerging regarding the EFL skill sets that two respective groupings consider to be par for the English course. There are exceptions, naturally. You for instance! But then you seem to be an exceptional guy all round Very Happy
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