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Nolos
Joined: 23 Oct 2011
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 1:21 am Post subject: Psycho Wants Divorce, We Have a Kid... |
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DO NOT MARRY A KOREAN!!! (ok, now that that's out of the way...):
The woman is a complete nut. She totally does not get the concept that marriage is a life-long commitment and there are ups and down and that it is not easy, but we must strive to make it work for the sake of children. Apparently I take the more conservative approach to marriage and she is of the celebrity 2-months-and-it's-over variety. (We've been married for about a year, though.)
Anyway, I'm not going into details, but I would like some information about what happens to my baby should we get divorced. My baby is only 4 months old. 4 MONTHS OLD! I don't even know where my wife and my baby are at the moment. She's ran out of the house since Friday and staying with one of her friends.
I'm assuming the Korean court system will bend over backwards for my wife since she is Korean and give her custody after she manipulates them like she has me for the past 3 years. But what's the chances of me getting custody? She has a good job and can live independently and support our baby so I'm chalking the custody up for her at this point.
Now then, most importantly, what would happen to my F6 visa? Would that get canceled right away?
I told her I'm not signing any papers ever and she is going to have sue me to get the kid and for the divorce. I'm not going to make it easy for her. Then again, this could all be just another manipulating trick to get me to act the way she wanted to mold me, which I'm sure it is. But I just want to know what my options are in case of the (likely?) event she is serious and decides to pursue a divorce.
**TL/DR PEOPLE**
1: What happens to my F6 visa if we get divorced?
2: We have a baby. Would custody rights go automatically to her? |
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OneWayTraffic
Joined: 14 Mar 2005
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 1:43 am Post subject: |
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No and no.
You keep the visa.
Custody is a tricky thing. Could go either way. The child's interest is that you both keep contact. Obviously.
Korean women are pretty emotional. Give her a few days to cool down. |
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T-J
Joined: 10 Oct 2008 Location: Seoul EunpyungGu Yeonsinnae
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 2:30 am Post subject: |
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Quote: |
1: What happens to my F6 visa if we get divorced?
2: We have a baby. Would custody rights go automatically to her?
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1. Without a child you lose it on expiration of current sojourn unless your spouse is at fault or abandons you. If you have a child and custody or visitation is granted you may keep the visa regardless.
2. Custody is not automatic. I know of foreigners winning custody, although the ones I know a female.
3. Get a lawyer.
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Captain Corea
Joined: 28 Feb 2005 Location: Seoul
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 2:49 am Post subject: |
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Sorry to hear you're going through this, OP. Quick question - do you want custody? |
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Nolos
Joined: 23 Oct 2011
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 3:17 am Post subject: |
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Captain Corea wrote: |
Sorry to hear you're going through this, OP. Quick question - do you want custody? |
Absolutely, 100%, YES.
And CC, before you go any father are you talking about taking advantage of the HCCH act that Korea is not a part of? Because I am thinking about that as a possibility... |
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T-J
Joined: 10 Oct 2008 Location: Seoul EunpyungGu Yeonsinnae
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 3:27 am Post subject: |
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I'll preface this with I don't think that would be the preferable course of action. Of course I'm going on limited facts.
To your point, does your child already have a passport from your home country? If not it could be difficult, if not impossible to get at this point without your spouses consent.
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Captain Corea
Joined: 28 Feb 2005 Location: Seoul
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 3:34 am Post subject: |
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Nolos wrote: |
Captain Corea wrote: |
Sorry to hear you're going through this, OP. Quick question - do you want custody? |
Absolutely, 100%, YES.
And CC, before you go any father are you talking about taking advantage of the HCCH act that Korea is not a part of? Because I am thinking about that as a possibility... |
No, wasn't really heading in that direction.
I just wasn't sure of it from the OP.
T-J's advice about hiring legal council is your best route, IMO. Look into it.
Right now, your wife and baby are MIA - are you able to track her down through her family/friends? |
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falco
Joined: 26 Nov 2005
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 4:44 am Post subject: |
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Dont really think I can add much here thats actually useful to you at the moment OP, other than to say my thoughts and prayers are with you. I went through a not entirely disimilar situation back in my home country years ago. I cant imagine what it must be like to have this sort of thing occur in a foreign country. |
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PatrickGHBusan
Joined: 24 Jun 2008 Location: Busan (1997-2008) Canada 2008 -
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 5:47 am Post subject: |
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I will echo what TJ said and strongly advise you to get a lawyer or at least get in contact with one so he or she can be ready to intervene should it become needed.
I hope this ends well for you and I cannot imagine what you are going through. |
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singerdude
Joined: 18 Jul 2009
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 6:23 am Post subject: |
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You may already be aware of this, but in case you're not:
http://www.koreatimes.co.kr/www/news/nation/2012/10/116_123423.html
Also, from the article:
The procedure will be mandatory when couples with minor children agree to an uncontested divorce. In other cases, the courts can also recommend counseling at the judges� discretion. |
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young_clinton
Joined: 09 Sep 2009
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 6:34 am Post subject: Re: Psycho Wants Divorce, We Have a Kid... |
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Nolos wrote: |
I'm assuming the Korean court system will bend over backwards for my wife since she is Korean and give her custody after she manipulates them like she has me for the past 3 years. But what's the chances of me getting custody? |
Unless she is cerfifiably insane (whatever that is defined as), your chances are not so good. I would try to find out where she is at and try to work out a deal with her for visitation rights. If she feels that you don't have any rights and runs away, track her down again, take the baby and go back to your country with it. The bottom line is if you have to flee to your country to have access to your child then do it. |
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Unibrow
Joined: 20 Aug 2012
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 6:52 am Post subject: Re: Psycho Wants Divorce, We Have a Kid... |
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young_clinton wrote: |
Nolos wrote: |
I'm assuming the Korean court system will bend over backwards for my wife since she is Korean and give her custody after she manipulates them like she has me for the past 3 years. But what's the chances of me getting custody? |
Unless she is cerfifiably insane (whatever that is defined as), your chances are not so good. I would try to find out where she is at and try to work out a deal with her for visitation rights. If she feels that you don't have any rights and runs away, track her down again, take the baby and go back to your country with it. The bottom line is if you have to flee to your country to have access to your child then do it. |
So you want him to raise the child on his own on a (presumably) completely different continent from his mother? Not only is that difficult, it's also unfair to the mother and her relatives. We only have one side of the story here. |
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young_clinton
Joined: 09 Sep 2009
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 12:41 pm Post subject: Re: Psycho Wants Divorce, We Have a Kid... |
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Unibrow wrote: |
young_clinton wrote: |
Nolos wrote: |
I'm assuming the Korean court system will bend over backwards for my wife since she is Korean and give her custody after she manipulates them like she has me for the past 3 years. But what's the chances of me getting custody? |
Unless she is cerfifiably insane (whatever that is defined as), your chances are not so good. I would try to find out where she is at and try to work out a deal with her for visitation rights. If she feels that you don't have any rights and runs away, track her down again, take the baby and go back to your country with it. The bottom line is if you have to flee to your country to have access to your child then do it. |
So you want him to raise the child on his own on a (presumably) completely different continent from his mother? Not only is that difficult, it's also unfair to the mother and her relatives. We only have one side of the story here. |
If she is running and hiding from him, then it is not unfair. |
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Zackback
Joined: 05 Nov 2010 Location: Kyungbuk
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 1:09 pm Post subject: |
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Hey man sorry to hear about what you are going through. Just when I was thinking about marriage I read this and it terrifies me. |
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GoldMember
Joined: 24 Oct 2006
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Posted: Mon Nov 12, 2012 3:09 pm Post subject: |
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There are 2 sources of advice 1. free advice on Dave's or 2. spend money on a decent lawyer. |
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