Site Search:
 
TEFL International Supports Dave's ESL Cafe
TEFL Courses, TESOL Course, English Teaching Jobs - TEFL International
Korean Job Discussion Forums Forum Index Korean Job Discussion Forums
"The Internet's Meeting Place for ESL/EFL Teachers from Around the World!"
 
 FAQFAQ   SearchSearch   MemberlistMemberlist   UsergroupsUsergroups   RegisterRegister 
 ProfileProfile   Log in to check your private messagesLog in to check your private messages   Log inLog in 

social life with no (or limited) alcohol??
Goto page 1, 2  Next
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Korean Job Discussion Forums Forum Index -> General Discussion Forum
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
danniedoodles



Joined: 27 Dec 2012

PostPosted: Wed Feb 06, 2013 4:55 pm    Post subject: social life with no (or limited) alcohol?? Reply with quote

i have been researching what life will be like living in south korea and surprise! lots of alcohol! even with employers/coworkers, maybe!

my question is - will my social life suffer if i don't drink? i mean, i DO drink, sometimes. not a lot at all. maybe one drink a month, or a special occasion. i have no problems with it its just not my thing most of the time.
am i better off just saying i don't drink AT ALL so i'm not pressured? HOW bad, exactly, is it to turn down drinks with an employer or co-workers?
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Otherside



Joined: 06 Sep 2007

PostPosted: Wed Feb 06, 2013 5:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It is what you make of it.

The co-worker drinking thing (Korean co-workers) is not actually a big deal.
At a public school, you'll go out for a staff dinner once or twice a semester. 2 or 3 drinks is more than enough for such an occasion (though, some of the teachers drink a lot more).

Personally, I don't drink much. I can easily go a few months without a drink, but if the time is right, I'll drink with the best of them.

The problem comes with your expat friends. A large amount of socialising here is geared around the bars and clubs, and guess what, at those places you're going to drink.

So, either
1. find friends who like activities which don't involve alcohol,
2. get used to drinking alot, or
3. be the only sober guy at the bar.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
boomhauer



Joined: 02 Nov 2012

PostPosted: Sat Feb 09, 2013 5:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Im not a drinker, it does effect things a bit

If you go out to the bar, just try to nurse a beer or two the whole night, you dont need to get drunk
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Harpeau



Joined: 01 Feb 2003
Location: In Hannam-dong, Seoul.

PostPosted: Sat Feb 09, 2013 4:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

There are some meetups that seem pretty tame. If you go to a bar, just have a soft-drink. Not a big deal.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website Yahoo Messenger
wylies99



Joined: 13 May 2006
Location: I'm one cool cat!

PostPosted: Sat Feb 09, 2013 5:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

There are many things you can do in Korea besides sit in bars while everyone else is getting smashed. There are plenty of museums, palaces, shopping centers, and groups that have meetups. You can look on Facebook and on other social media. It all depends on your interests.
Even if you end up essentially on your own use the time to get in shape, see movies, or try new restaurants on your own. You'd be surprised how strong you can be if you've never done things alone.
Just remember that everyone came here alone, the first year, anyway, and others understand how you feel.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Hugo85



Joined: 27 Aug 2010

PostPosted: Sat Feb 09, 2013 6:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

When I got to Korea I would just get smashed with other foreigners. These days I drink a lot less hanging out with Korean friends and just doing dinner/coffee/multibang.

It really depends on which friends you make, foreigner or not.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
wylies99



Joined: 13 May 2006
Location: I'm one cool cat!

PostPosted: Sat Feb 09, 2013 6:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hugo85 wrote:
When I got to Korea I would just get smashed with other foreigners. These days I drink a lot less hanging out with Korean friends and just doing dinner/coffee/multibang.

It really depends on which friends you make, foreigner or not.


It is true that when you first arrive in Korea that it appears that "everyone" drinks to excess. But it's not true. It just takes time to find others.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
dairyairy



Joined: 17 May 2012
Location: South Korea

PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2013 1:12 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Here are some meetup groups
http://forums.eslcafe.com/korea/viewtopic.php?t=225417&highlight=dance
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
NohopeSeriously



Joined: 17 Jan 2011
Location: The Christian Right-Wing Educational Republic of Korea

PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2013 6:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I speak Korean and I rarely drink any alcoholic beverage. I'm doing fine.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Yaya



Joined: 25 Feb 2003
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2013 6:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You can have fun and live in Korea sans alcohol. Even back in the 1990s, I knew people who barely drank who liked the country.

A good way to avoid having to drink is to say you're either sick or have a physical condition not conducive to alcohol consumption.

Plenty of other things to do other than drink if you look for them, like studying Korean, special interest groups, mountain climbing, exploring the Korean countryside, preparing for graduate school or a test, etc.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
some waygug-in



Joined: 25 Jan 2003

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2013 6:43 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Tell them you don't drink (alcohol). You can still go to the school

dinners, but just drink pop or water. It actually may work out to your benefit since you are not drinking,

you can leave right after the dinner is finished.

People who drink will be expected to stay there for hours drinking with

the principal and the staff.


As far as things to do, you have to make those things happen.

Join a Korean class, go to church, go hiking, ride a bike, go sight-seeing,

there's plenty to do if you put your mind to it.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Cartman



Joined: 30 Jun 2009

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2013 9:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I must admit, this was tricky for me, generally a guy who enjoys 1-2 beers at a bar on any given night - surrounded by alcoholics (most of the teachers at my school were in their mid twenties, while I was over 30) - for the first few months I just went with it, was drunk more times per week than I've been my whole life. Then I couldn't take it anymore. I backed right off, and everyone definitely notices - it's hard when beers were 2500 won or less at a bar and someone always came back to the table with a round of 6 beers. Now there's a fresh beer in front of you and it's hard to turn it down. Constant comments always directed toward the light drinker - "HEY, are you not drinking? What's going on?" - of course, I could just laugh it off and not care, but I did get bored hanging around a bunch of wasted foreigners most of the time. And it's not fun sitting at a table for 3+ hours if you are not keen on getting drunk!

Another lesson to learn was to NEVER allow the bar to run a tab on your table... too many times we were charged for extra beers, and had no way to prove otherwise, or argue in Korean. I've had Koreans tell me this has happened to them, but at least they could argue in their own language and get it cleared up. And sadly, one of the worst bars I experienced for this was the favorite one in Itaewon that starts with a "W". They cleared things up EASILY after a minor complaint, but this shouldn't happen to begin with and it happened at least 3 times when we had a group there. Keep a separate tally somehow on your phone as to what is being ordered!

Some good advice here, and I know people are saying to do "other" things, but when it's a Tuesday night and you feel like getting out of your place, sometimes the only option available and convenient at the last minute is to meet your colleagues at whatever local bar they are at Shocked
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
happiness



Joined: 04 Sep 2010

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2013 7:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I dont drink and I hate the smell of smoke. So, I just buffed up my social skills, talking to people everywhere out and about. I works and its free, but you have to decide you need to do it.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
CentralCali



Joined: 17 May 2007

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2013 7:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Simply tell the boss, supervisor, friend, or whoever it is that you don't drink. No need to discuss reasons for it. Simply say you don't drink if you don't want to drink. Unless your boss is some kind of sociopath, you won't have any problem.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
sojusucks



Joined: 31 May 2008

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2013 8:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Cartman wrote:
I must admit, this was tricky for me, generally a guy who enjoys 1-2 beers at a bar on any given night - surrounded by alcoholics (most of the teachers at my school were in their mid twenties, while I was over 30) - for the first few months I just went with it, was drunk more times per week than I've been my whole life. Then I couldn't take it anymore. I backed right off, and everyone definitely notices - it's hard when beers were 2500 won or less at a bar and someone always came back to the table with a round of 6 beers. Now there's a fresh beer in front of you and it's hard to turn it down. Constant comments always directed toward the light drinker - "HEY, are you not drinking? What's going on?" - of course, I could just laugh it off and not care, but I did get bored hanging around a bunch of wasted foreigners most of the time. And it's not fun sitting at a table for 3+ hours if you are not keen on getting drunk!

Another lesson to learn was to NEVER allow the bar to run a tab on your table... too many times we were charged for extra beers, and had no way to prove otherwise, or argue in Korean. I've had Koreans tell me this has happened to them, but at least they could argue in their own language and get it cleared up. And sadly, one of the worst bars I experienced for this was the favorite one in Itaewon that starts with a "W". They cleared things up EASILY after a minor complaint, but this shouldn't happen to begin with and it happened at least 3 times when we had a group there. Keep a separate tally somehow on your phone as to what is being ordered!

Some good advice here, and I know people are saying to do "other" things, but when it's a Tuesday night and you feel like getting out of your place, sometimes the only option available and convenient at the last minute is to meet your colleagues at whatever local bar they are at Shocked


That was my problem. I don't mind tossing back a few, watching a game, and just socializing, but too many fellow teachers think going to a bar means drinking until you literally pass out, or run out of money, and that's any and every night of the week. That's just too much, especially when those drinking buddies are not exactly college-age kids. It's not just men, either. I've seen many women of all ages do it and put themselves in potentially dangerous situations with no sober friends there and a bar full of drunken strangers all around them. You need to be smarter than that.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Korean Job Discussion Forums Forum Index -> General Discussion Forum All times are GMT - 8 Hours
Goto page 1, 2  Next
Page 1 of 2

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum


This page is maintained by the one and only Dave Sperling.
Contact Dave's ESL Cafe
Copyright © 2013 Dave Sperling. All Rights Reserved.

Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2002 phpBB Group

TEFL International Supports Dave's ESL Cafe
TEFL Courses, TESOL Course, English Teaching Jobs - TEFL International