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Korean Weddings
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chickenpie



Joined: 24 Dec 2008

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 6:07 am    Post subject: Korean Weddings Reply with quote

If you haven't been to one yet this is what you can expect!


Arrive at a building where multiple weddings are being held simultaneously.

Follow signs to wedding hall H

Shake hands with people you really aren’t sure are relatives. Hope you are at the right wedding as the ones to the left and right are in every way identical.

Show up and pay money. Not a meaningful, personal gift (there is no space for those even if you did bring one, and even if there were you would be frowned upon for not giving cash)

Jostle for a seat in a hall with plastic everything. Not a single aspect is organic. A convention room at a third-tier, midwest Howard Johnson would be more natural.

Clap for the bride and groom who enter at a quick pace under some shitty disco lighting and techno music across an aisle made of underlit white plastic.

Stoic-looking, artificially-positioned in-laws are bowed to in the floor-licking subservient way the signifies how progressive and modern Klown culture is.

A 5-minute ceremony by a bored, 85-year-old…. preacher? who repeats the exact same shit every 20 minutes. Everyone is bored shitless, even the bride and groom. Any expectation of sincerity or deeper meaning has now been long abandoned

Some shitty candle is lit by two barbeque-length extendo-Bic lighters (then is quickly blown out to be reused 20 minutes later)

Some friend of the couple comes up to sing some off-key, spleen-shattering “balla-duh” (as apparently every fucking Klown ever born thinks the world wants to hear their talentless fucking renditions of popular songs that weren’t sung with any talent when they were recorded to begin with)

We’re 15 minutes in and everyone claps politely. Those near the back have already made their way to the buffet tables.

Eat in a room with 100 tables. You don’t know where you are supposed to sit since there are people from half a dozen different weddings scattered about in different stages of their meals. There are bottles of soju and klassy paper cups on every table to reflect just how valuable and special the day is.

Watch as the Klowns devour the slops like the pigs they are, splattering food from bow to stern of the place and making noises that a diseased sow would be ashamed of.

Get your parking validated and prepare for the inevitable gut-rot splatter-shits that will follow the “wedding feast”

Never contact your “friends” again out of resentment for having to have traveled out of your way for, and paid for, the “privilege” of being subjected to that horrid half hour.

http://klownisms.wordpress.com/

Not my blog, but I feel it needs to be shared.
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CentralCali



Joined: 17 May 2007

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 6:16 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Interesting take on the issue. I've been to a few wedding hall "ceremonies" both in Japan and Korea and, thankfully, none of them was as you describe.
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chickenpie



Joined: 24 Dec 2008

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 6:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I've been here over ten years, apart from my own wedding which was in a garden they have all been as posted.

And I didn't describe anything, I just posted the highlights from the blog.
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wooden nickels



Joined: 23 May 2010

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 6:52 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

chickenpie wrote:
I've been here over ten years, apart from my own wedding which was in a garden they have all been as posted.

And I didn't describe anything, I just posted the highlights from the blog.


I've been here over ten years also. I was married here and the description posted fits my own wedding within 95% accuracy. It also describes all of the weddings, except one, that I've attended here. It fits the one odd one to a probable 50%, it was in a garden. I've probably attended around 10 to 12 weddings in Korea.

I should mention that I was legally married long before the wedding ceremony itself.

However, I must say that I've had a wonderful married life.
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optik404



Joined: 24 Jun 2008

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 6:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Author must be desperate for content.
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chickenpie



Joined: 24 Dec 2008

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 7:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

optik404 wrote:
Author must be desperate for content.


Big part of any culture is weddings.

Why would the writer be desperate for content when writing about something so fundamental to any culture?

Again, not my blog.

Great read though.
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chickenpie



Joined: 24 Dec 2008

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 7:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

wooden nickels wrote:


I should mention that I was legally married long before the wedding ceremony itself.

However, I must say that I've had a wonderful married life.


Same as me! I'm still having a wonderful married life!
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optik404



Joined: 24 Jun 2008

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 7:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

chickenpie wrote:
optik404 wrote:
Author must be desperate for content.


Big part of any culture is weddings.

Why would the writer be desperate for content when writing about something so fundamental to any culture?

Again, not my blog.

Great read though.


So when you travel to a new country, you ask the locals about their wedding culture? Rolling Eyes
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Stain



Joined: 08 Jan 2014

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 7:16 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

chickenpie, great blog. My advice would be to create several different accounts instead of one to promote the site. Otherwise, you might awaken the sleeping mods and they will ban you, forcing you to make another account anyway. In that case, you'd better make several.
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Stain



Joined: 08 Jan 2014

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 7:21 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

This might be off topic, but I've nothing else to add.

Last edited by Stain on Sun Jul 06, 2014 7:24 am; edited 1 time in total
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chickenpie



Joined: 24 Dec 2008

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 7:22 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

optik404 wrote:
chickenpie wrote:
optik404 wrote:
Author must be desperate for content.


Big part of any culture is weddings.

Why would the writer be desperate for content when writing about something so fundamental to any culture?

Again, not my blog.

Great read though.


So when you travel to a new country, you ask the locals about their wedding culture? Rolling Eyes


Wedding aren't a big part of a county's culture? fool.
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chickenpie



Joined: 24 Dec 2008

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 7:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Stain wrote:
chickenpie, great blog. My advice would be to create several different accounts instead of one to promote the site. Otherwise, you might awaken the sleeping mods and they will ban you, forcing you to make another account anyway. In that case, you'd better make several.


It's not my blog, I just love the writing because it is so true.


Just sharing.
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Stain



Joined: 08 Jan 2014

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 7:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

chickenpie wrote:
Stain wrote:
chickenpie, great blog. My advice would be to create several different accounts instead of one to promote the site. Otherwise, you might awaken the sleeping mods and they will ban you, forcing you to make another account anyway. In that case, you'd better make several.


It's not my blog, I just love the writing because it is so true.


Just sharing.


Either way, it's promotion. Be careful. I know from experience.
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optik404



Joined: 24 Jun 2008

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 7:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

chickenpie wrote:
optik404 wrote:
chickenpie wrote:
optik404 wrote:
Author must be desperate for content.


Big part of any culture is weddings.

Why would the writer be desperate for content when writing about something so fundamental to any culture?

Again, not my blog.

Great read though.


So when you travel to a new country, you ask the locals about their wedding culture? Rolling Eyes


Wedding aren't a big part of a county's culture? fool.


Nobody said that.

When you travel to a country you've never been, do you ask locals about their wedding culture? Obviously you don't because that would be strange.
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chickenpie



Joined: 24 Dec 2008

PostPosted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 7:45 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

optik404 wrote:
chickenpie wrote:
optik404 wrote:
chickenpie wrote:
optik404 wrote:
Author must be desperate for content.


Big part of any culture is weddings.

Why would the writer be desperate for content when writing about something so fundamental to any culture?

Again, not my blog.

Great read though.


So when you travel to a new country, you ask the locals about their wedding culture? Rolling Eyes


Wedding aren't a big part of a county's culture? fool.


Nobody said that.

When you travel to a country you've never been, do you ask locals about their wedding culture? Obviously you don't because that would be strange.


You seem to have a problem with reading and writing.

The blog is about Korean culture, written by someone who has been here for a good few years. They are writing about Korean weddings. You do know weddings don't you? Something that happens in nearly every culture in the world.

Is that too much for you to comprehend?
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