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Western Women w/ Korean Guys: Do You Get Evil Eyes?
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KimchiNinja



Joined: 01 May 2012
Location: Gangnam

PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 7:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

madoka wrote:
"Can" happen in North America??? Try dating the wrong race in the wrong part of town and see what happens. I'd argue it's much more prevalent in the U.S., because we are more racially segregated than we'd like to admit. I've never heard of anyone getting shot, stabbed, killed, or brutally beaten for dating the wrong race in Korea. Getting a dirty look or offensive comment seems rather tame in comparison.


Yeah or some old guy could follow the two of your around with a video camera like that one guy posted about. But sure is better than getting stabbed to death!
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laynamarya



Joined: 01 Jan 2010
Location: Gwangjin-gu

PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 8:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

What sort of BS do we usually dish out?

My husband has frequently commented on how glad he is that I don't do a lot of things my Korean counterparts do, like demanding jewelry, designer handbags, smartphones as presents. I don't make him carry my stuff. I don't tell him what to do, who he can and can't hang out with, or when to come home. I don't call him twenty times a day. Not all Korean women do those things, but the ones he dated did.

I'm sure every woman has her own sort of issues (as do all you fine gentlemen), but I really don't think Korean women in general are any better or worse than white women.
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KimchiNinja



Joined: 01 May 2012
Location: Gangnam

PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 8:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

laynamarya wrote:

I'm sure every woman has her own sort of issues (as do all you fine gentlemen), but I really don't think Korean women in general are any better or worse than white women.


Yeah but guys make that decision. You can't grade your own test paper.

Asian women are just universally better.
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laynamarya



Joined: 01 Jan 2010
Location: Gwangjin-gu

PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 8:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, somebody already chose to marry me, so I figure I got a least a passing grade.

Some of my best friends are Korean women, so I know there's some cool ones out there. But I know plenty of great women of other nationalities, too. So, two questions:

1. What BS do white women dish out?

2. What makes Asian women categorically better than white women?
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Captain Corea



Joined: 28 Feb 2005
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 10:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

laynamarya wrote:


I'm sure every woman has her own sort of issues (as do all you fine gentlemen), but I really don't think Korean women in general are any better or worse than white women.


Being married to a Korean woman, I've had a lot of my buds back home ask me if there are any difficulties/challenges. After talking for a bit, they usually say pretty much the same sort of stuff as me - relationships have challenges.

    People are different
    Men and women are different
    Families are different
    Cultures are different


And in my experience, the challenges seem to go in that order. The biggest hurdles I've had to overcome with my wife lean more towards the top of that list.
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KimchiNinja



Joined: 01 May 2012
Location: Gangnam

PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 11:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

laynamarya wrote:


1. What BS do white women dish out?

2. What makes Asian women categorically better than white women?


Okay but I don't know how to answer any of these questions because a) it's all so obvious yet, b) can't be explained because you are a member of the white chick club and, are not aware of such things. Confused

1. Guys have already answered on this thread and about a million other threads on the invention known as the internet. It's not like one more person saying it is going to break thru the communication barrier.

2. Nature defines certain things such as femininity in a female and masculinity in a male as being universally attractive, and better for survival.
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laynamarya



Joined: 01 Jan 2010
Location: Gwangjin-gu

PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 11:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

1. Honestly, no one has ever said anything to me about white women dishing out bs. Women dishing out bs, yes, but never specifically white women. I'm curious about your personal experience. What bs have white women dished out to you? You never know, you could be the one to open my eyes to my errant ways. It could spare my husband lots of grief.

2. This makes more sense, I can see why men like women who doll themselves up. However, when looks trump common sense, such as wearing a miniskirt and spiked heels on icy days, I would argue that they do not, in fact, improve your chances for survival.
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PatrickGHBusan



Joined: 24 Jun 2008
Location: Busan (1997-2008) Canada 2008 -

PostPosted: Tue Oct 30, 2012 3:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Captain Corea wrote:
laynamarya wrote:


I'm sure every woman has her own sort of issues (as do all you fine gentlemen), but I really don't think Korean women in general are any better or worse than white women.


Being married to a Korean woman, I've had a lot of my buds back home ask me if there are any difficulties/challenges. After talking for a bit, they usually say pretty much the same sort of stuff as me - relationships have challenges.

    People are different
    Men and women are different
    Families are different
    Cultures are different


And in my experience, the challenges seem to go in that order. The biggest hurdles I've had to overcome with my wife lean more towards the top of that list.


I agree with this.

I will add that the additional "challenge" would be the cultural differences on core issues like kids education, social values and for some mixed couples initial language issues.

For us the biggest one is views on education (on a few occasions, nothing major).

As for what laynamarya said, it is is interesting. However, I am sad to report that my wife never demanded jewlery from me or asked me to carry her things. Wink
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nero



Joined: 11 Mar 2009

PostPosted: Tue Oct 30, 2012 4:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

laynamarya wrote:
1. Honestly, no one has ever said anything to me about white women dishing out bs. Women dishing out bs, yes, but never specifically white women. I'm curious about your personal experience. What bs have white women dished out to you? You never know, you could be the one to open my eyes to my errant ways. It could spare my husband lots of grief.

2. This makes more sense, I can see why men like women who doll themselves up. However, when looks trump common sense, such as wearing a miniskirt and spiked heels on icy days, I would argue that they do not, in fact, improve your chances for survival.


Don't worry, I think KimchiNinja can't answer your questions because he has never actually dated a woman before. Of any race. As such, this sort of man has an idealized view of Asian women as "real women" (meaning submissive, subservient, and don't ask to be treated as equals).

Boy, is he in for a shock later on. Here's the truth of it:

1.) The sort of man I described above are often socially and culturally fragile (weenies) and see Asian women as more passive and less scary.

2.) No one likes to admit they are weenies and afraid of the women of their own culture, so instead, they attack the femininity of the women who scare them.

Hence the level of misogyny on this website. Most attractive, stable guys I know who have Korean girlfriends also have western female friends and have nothing bad to say about western women. They may not be interested in a relationship with one, but the don't decry the women from their culture or tar them all with the same brush. This is because they are well adjusted highly functioning adults.
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edwardcatflap



Joined: 22 Mar 2009

PostPosted: Tue Oct 30, 2012 5:45 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
1. Honestly, no one has ever said anything to me about white women dishing out bs. Women dishing out bs, yes, but never specifically white women. I'm curious about your personal experience. What bs have white women dished out to you? You never know, you could be the one to open my eyes to my errant ways. It could spare my husband lots of grief.

2. This makes more sense, I can see why men like women who doll themselves up. However, when looks trump common sense, such as wearing a miniskirt and spiked heels on icy days, I would argue that they do not, in fact, improve your chances for survival.


Don't worry, I think KimchiNinja can't answer your questions because he has never actually dated a woman before. Of any race. As such, this sort of man has an idealized view of Asian women as "real women" (meaning submissive, subservient, and don't ask to be treated as equals).

Boy, is he in for a shock later on. Here's the truth of it:

1.) The sort of man I described above are often socially and culturally fragile (weenies) and see Asian women as more passive and less scary.

2.) No one likes to admit they are weenies and afraid of the women of their own culture, so instead, they attack the femininity of the women who scare them.

Hence the level of misogyny on this website. Most attractive, stable guys I know who have Korean girlfriends also have western female friends and have nothing bad to say about western women. They may not be interested in a relationship with one, but the don't decry the women from their culture or tar them all with the same brush. This is because they are well adjusted highly functioning adults.



This sounds like the usual 'only losers marry Asian women' type response. The fact is that a lot of 'attractive, stable' Western guys also prefer Asian women and that's what really pisses a lot of Western women off. For every 'attractive, stable, well adjusted' guy who likes to be told what to do and enjoys being consistently challenged on the role of women in modern society every time he asks his partner to wash up a cup, there are a few more guys who feel comfortable in a relationship where their partner actually revels in what they see as their traditional role.
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laynamarya



Joined: 01 Jan 2010
Location: Gwangjin-gu

PostPosted: Tue Oct 30, 2012 4:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

PatrickGHBusan, something tells me you picked a winner.

Edwardcatflap, interesting point. I can understand the Angry Feminist persona getting old. This is actually one of the issues I have with the concept of feminism, both in the minds of men and women. Now, I attended The Ultimate Feminist College, so I'm not exactly a shrinking violet, but I was always told that feminism was supposed to be about equality and choices. And though most vocal feminists seem to be very anti-men, that's not how feminism works in reality.

I, and most of the western women I know married to Koreans, enjoy relationships with mutual responsibility, but they also work hard to take care of their husbands. Do I expect my husband to respect me as an equal? Definitely. But how did I spend most of my free time yesterday? Cooking, baking, and crocheting. It is not only possible to be a feminist who revels in her 'traditional role' as it were, it is quite common.

Interestingly, most of the Korean women I know married to western men also lean towards feminism and Western ideals.

At the end of the day, you just find someone whose style works best with yours. If I were a guy living in Korea, I would probably pick a Korean woman too, if only because there are more options, and a greater likelihood that I would find someone compatible.

But I take issue with sweeping generalizations about any group of people.
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KimchiNinja



Joined: 01 May 2012
Location: Gangnam

PostPosted: Tue Oct 30, 2012 5:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

edwardcatflap wrote:
This sounds like the usual 'only losers marry Asian women' type response. The fact is that a lot of 'attractive, stable' Western guys also prefer Asian women and that's what really pisses a lot of Western women off.


I'm busy in the office and don't have time for this silliness today, but yes I imagine your analysis is close. Just skimmed the posts, but it looks like the same old same old. Rolling Eyes

This conversation has happened many times, many places. US women truely do not have a clue (nor do they care to have a clue) what their men really think, I'm always struck by that. But then who cares...it's a problem happening in a society thousands of miles away.
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nero



Joined: 11 Mar 2009

PostPosted: Tue Oct 30, 2012 6:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

KimchiNinja wrote:
edwardcatflap wrote:
This sounds like the usual 'only losers marry Asian women' type response. The fact is that a lot of 'attractive, stable' Western guys also prefer Asian women and that's what really pisses a lot of Western women off.


I'm busy in the office and don't have time for this silliness today, but yes I imagine your analysis is close. Just skimmed the posts, but it looks like the same old same old. Rolling Eyes

This conversation has happened many times, many places. US women truely do not have a clue (nor do they care to have a clue) what their men really think, I'm always struck by that. But then who cares...it's a problem happening in a society thousands of miles away.


I am not American, so I cannot comment on you bitching about the females from your country. I can only delve into my own persoanl experiences with western women (some of whom are American).

@Edward Catflap -- don't put words into my mouth. I have nowhere suggested that guys who are into Asian women are losers.
I am not a woman, I am a male who has both male and female friends.

Some of my friends are married to/dating Korean women. Most are happy. It is not a problem for my western female friends. What they do have a problem with is men like you who assume they are bitter and jealous. None of my female friends could give a shit. Nor do my male friends assume people think they are losers for dating/marrying Korean women. We have parties and everyone gets along splendidly.
I don't know what world you live in.

My point was, that any normal well adjusted guy doesn't feel the need to belittle 50% of the population where he is from. That screams insecurity.
If you like Asian women, more power to you. But keep you prejudice and judgements against western women to yourself. That's what makes you look like a weenie.
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madoka



Joined: 27 Mar 2008

PostPosted: Tue Oct 30, 2012 7:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

nero wrote:
But keep you prejudice and judgements against western women to yourself. That's what makes you look like a weenie.


Hey now. Don't be so close minded. Get to know edwardcatflap better and you might find that there are a myriad of facets about him that makes him a weenie.
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edwardcatflap



Joined: 22 Mar 2009

PostPosted: Tue Oct 30, 2012 7:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
@Edward Catflap -- don't put words into my mouth. I have nowhere suggested that guys who are into Asian women are losers.
I am not a woman, I am a male who has both male and female friends.



I did not put words in your mouth I said 'it sounds like the usual only losers marry Asian women response'. IE it's similar to that kind of response because you were going on about 'attractive' men not having the same attitude as presumably, in your eyes, unattractive posters like Kimchi Ninja. As soon as people start with the kind of argument that claims good looking people act one way and ugly 'losers' act in another way I tend to assume the rest of the point is twaddle I'm afraid. Having looked at your agargument again I can actually see you are making a fair point, though I think there's a difference between saying you don't like women from your country as partners and saying you don't get on with them in general.
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