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Psycho Wants Divorce, We Have a Kid...
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IPayInCash



Joined: 27 Jul 2013
Location: Away from all my board stalkers :)

PostPosted: Mon Sep 16, 2013 8:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The OP is Dodge7. That makes this thread even funnier. Laughing
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alongway



Joined: 02 Jan 2012

PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2013 12:47 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Everything I've heard from Koreans is that the father typically gets custody, often because they have the better job and can better take care of them.

It's the complete opposite of North America.
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Janny



Joined: 02 Jul 2008
Location: all over the place

PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2013 1:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

OP, your dream. It means...

This is not over.

Get her and your kid out of Korea. Or leave her and start over.

I predict divorce. Sorry. But...I'm divorced, very happily. I don't have a child, though. There will lie your heartbreak.

But hearts heal.
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cdninkorea



Joined: 27 Jan 2006
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2013 5:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I find the double standard in this thread interesting. The OP said several times that his wife is physically abusive, and yet no one suggested he divorce her. Imagine if a woman came on the board and said her husband was physically abusive?
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Janny



Joined: 02 Jul 2008
Location: all over the place

PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2013 6:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think the double standard is obvious and logical.

1) Men are usually physically stronger than women. So in an instance of assault, a woman will probably bear tougher injury than a man receiving assault from a woman. Not in all cases, but most.

2) Men are more prone to physical aggression than women. Women use psychological warfare, when they can. Or they get help. Men lash out with their fists. Again, not all men. But many...especially in Korea.

I predicted divorce because the OP sounds like a self-aware, open person (who referred to his wife as a "psycho" lol). He will be the victim of mind games throughout this marriage. She will be the victim of his obtuse unaffection. She will be the victim of her own frustration. She will lash out at him in many ways, and the LEAST damaging will be a slap across his cheek.

He mentioned the physical abuse only to carry this case further to his side, to support the "psycho" label. I doubt very much he is in physical danger.

The biggest victim will be the child, especially if they stay married and continue arguing for most of their days. I suspect the OP knows this too.
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cdninkorea



Joined: 27 Jan 2006
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2013 7:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Janny wrote:
I think the double standard is obvious and logical.

1) Men are usually physically stronger than women. So in an instance of assault, a woman will probably bear tougher injury than a man receiving assault from a woman. Not in all cases, but most.

2) Men are more prone to physical aggression than women. Women use psychological warfare, when they can. Or they get help. Men lash out with their fists. Again, not all men. But many...especially in Korea.


Yes, a man will inflict more damage if he hits a woman, and men are more likely to be physically violent, but in this case it's the woman who's violent, not the man. Also, if a woman has a weapon or knows where and how to hit without one, she can inflict a lot of damage.
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chrisinkorea2011



Joined: 16 Jan 2011

PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2013 7:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

IPayInCash wrote:
The OP is Dodge7. That makes this thread even funnier. Laughing


when we ALL KNOW youre one of the many personas of Dodge7, give it a freaking break and stop being a tool. Rolling Eyes
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Old fat expat



Joined: 19 Sep 2005
Location: a caravan of dust, making for a windy prairie

PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2013 7:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
and men are more likely to be physically violent


Research by Giles and Strauss says otherwise. The problem is one of the parties is 30% larger and stronger. Incidence of violence is almost the same (slightly higher for women truth be told) but it is the results of the violence that is the problem. Just saying (it is such an important social problem it is important to know the facts).
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Threequalseven



Joined: 08 May 2012

PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2013 9:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

All I can say is that it's pretty ridiculous that his wife didn't even bother talking about why she was upset before just up and leaving. I'm amazed at some of the responses on here. The dude probably deserved a stern talking-to, but to have his whole livelihood threatened, christ. How can anybody say this is normal? The guy didn't even know why she left.
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Fox



Joined: 04 Mar 2009

PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2013 9:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Old fat expat wrote:
Quote:
and men are more likely to be physically violent


Research by Giles and Strauss says otherwise. The problem is one of the parties is 30% larger and stronger. Incidence of violence is almost the same (slightly higher for women truth be told) but it is the results of the violence that is the problem. Just saying (it is such an important social problem it is important to know the facts).


I also remember reading that women are more likely to use weapons, which can negate that strength differential. I am probably two or three times stronger than my wife, but if she hit me with a pan, that's not going to matter much. And if I were to pin her down and take it, I've opened myself up being declared abusive!

Fortunately, my wife is not at all violent, but I can understand the real challenges a man married to a violent woman faces. Society will not help him, and would probably even mock him.
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The Cosmic Hum



Joined: 09 May 2003
Location: Sonic Space

PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2013 11:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Threequalseven wrote:
All I can say is that it's pretty ridiculous that his wife didn't even bother talking about why she was upset before just up and leaving. I'm amazed at some of the responses on here. The dude probably deserved a stern talking-to, but to have his whole livelihood threatened, christ. How can anybody say this is normal? The guy didn't even know why she left.

Maybe...but one of his other personalities probably did.
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Old fat expat



Joined: 19 Sep 2005
Location: a caravan of dust, making for a windy prairie

PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2013 11:48 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
The guy didn't even know why she left.


This is the problem with being an 'alpha'. Why should he have cared?
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IPayInCash



Joined: 27 Jul 2013
Location: Away from all my board stalkers :)

PostPosted: Wed Sep 18, 2013 2:36 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

chrisinkorea2011 wrote:
IPayInCash wrote:
The OP is Dodge7. That makes this thread even funnier. Laughing


when we ALL KNOW youre one of the many personas of Dodge7, give it a freaking break and stop being a tool. Rolling Eyes


I am not Dodge7.
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