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Korean GF rushing to get married
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PatrickGHBusan



Joined: 24 Jun 2008
Location: Busan (1997-2008) Canada 2008 -

PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 8:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

That cold approach is impossible line is BS.

I met my wife because I decided to go and talk to her. No one introduced us.
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hellofaniceguy



Joined: 10 Jan 2003
Location: On your computer screen!

PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 4:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

PatrickGHBusan wrote:
That cold approach is impossible line is BS.

I met my wife because I decided to go and talk to her. No one introduced us.


For the life of me...I don't know why...(Here in korea), but my wife introduced herself to me without anyone doing it for her...and we've been married for over 20 years!
Most of the males I know in korea....both koreans and non korean males....met their wives/girlfriends the same way....

We all know that it does not matter what country...meeting someone...has nothing to do with culture...
years ago and still in some places today...marriages were/are arranged...but we know how well that works out!
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Hugo85



Joined: 27 Aug 2010

PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 6:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Cold approach works, but I think you have to make it clearer that you are trying to engage them rather than "ain't the weather nice".

That said, most Korean/Korean couples I know have found their gf's/bf's through student clubs or sogetting/meeting. That said, foreigner have to be more direct, which can be good or bad as the people we approach might have been just told "yo, yo, baby, come back to my place" a minute ago and at that moment might be distrustful of foreigners.
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KimchiNinja



Joined: 01 May 2012
Location: Gangnam

PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 7:25 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

chungbukdo wrote:
KimchiNinja wrote:

Koreans don't have any skill with talking to strangers, because such a thing is not done here. So cold approach, NO! That's what booking clubs are for, or regular clubs, or thru introduction, or the internet.


What?

You're "allowed" to cold approach if you're a foreigner. Its flattering to most Korean girls. They never get approached and they really like it.

I've cold approached everyone I've dated in Korea. How are you going to get the girl you want if you can't go up and talk to her?

Anyway, someone without experience being approached is so flattered that you've actually come up to her, it makes it much easier. Try cold approaching attractive yet cold girls in a club in major cities back home. They get it all the time so they give you the cold shoulder half the time, haha. IMO Korea is much easier.


Yes, you can do it with the excuse that you are a Westerner, and as they know - Westerners do that. Many will react badly to that, or flat out not know how to respond, and sometimes it will work great.

The point is just the culture difference exists, so be aware of it.
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World Traveler



Joined: 29 May 2009

PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 9:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

PatrickGHBusan wrote:
That cold approach is impossible line is BS.

I met my wife because I decided to go and talk to her. No one introduced us.

You told us a story about how you met your wife at a dinner party. How did you approach her? (Were there many people at that place?) Did you see her and then walk right up to her and introduce yourself?
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salutbonjour



Joined: 22 Jan 2013

PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 11:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

World Traveler wrote:
PatrickGHBusan wrote:
That cold approach is impossible line is BS.

I met my wife because I decided to go and talk to her. No one introduced us.

You told us a story about how you met your wife at a dinner party. How did you approach her? (Were there many people at that place?) Did you see her and then walk right up to her and introduce yourself?


Dinner party already means that there are common connections. Lukewarm approach?
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chungbukdo



Joined: 22 Aug 2010

PostPosted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 12:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

KimchiNinja wrote:
Yes, you can do it with the excuse that you are a Westerner, and as they know - Westerners do that. Many will react badly to that, or flat out not know how to respond, and sometimes it will work great.

The point is just the culture difference exists, so be aware of it.


I don't use an "excuse." Nobody had reacted badly, unless I have a very selective memory (probably do, I brainwash myself than I'm the chit). Korean people, especially women, are extremely polite and are much more worried about making someone upset or shy in public than many Western girls at bars in major cities back home.

I think the main "culture difference" is that Korean women have seen people get approached in TV or movies and wish something like that would happen to them, but it hasn't because it's rare for a Korean man to do that. Whereas in New York you might have to disarm someone's "creep" defenses, in Korea someone is likely to be flattered. At least for college aged girls.
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Los Angeloser



Joined: 26 Aug 2010
Location: Korea

PostPosted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 2:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

After 7 years of marriage and a son, my friend's Korean wife filed for divorce(he's got brown skin). She didn't like living in a lesser home when her mother/father lives in Gangnam Style apartment. The parents were never for the marriage so didn't attend it, about 18 months later after the wife dis-owned or refused to talk to her parents they met by chance on a public street. The father-in-law snuck up from behind my friend and hit him upside the head/ear in front of both their wives. The wives had to stop the father-in-law from hitting him again. After that accidental meeting on a public street my friend's Korean wife re-connected with her parents but all was down hill for my friend and the father-n-law will forever hate my brown-skinned friend.

The wife let's him see his kid about once a month while always demanding money, she wants it transferred through the banks but since she has basically taken his child away from him, he don't see why he should do what she says. She has a lawyer but he doesn't want to get one.
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Dodge7



Joined: 21 Oct 2011

PostPosted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 3:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Los Angeloser wrote:
After 7 years of marriage and a son, my friend's Korean wife filed for divorce(he's got brown skin). She didn't like living in a lesser home when her mother/father lives in Gangnam Style apartment. The parents were never for the marriage so didn't attend it, about 18 months later after the wife dis-owned or refused to talk to her parents they met by chance on a public street. The father-in-law snuck up from behind my friend and hit him upside the head/ear in front of both their wives. The wives had to stop the father-in-law from hitting him again. After that accidental meeting on a public street my friend's Korean wife re-connected with her parents but all was down hill for my friend and the father-n-law will forever hate my brown-skinned friend.

The wife let's him see his kid about once a month while always demanding money, she wants it transferred through the banks but since she has basically taken his child away from him, he don't see why he should do what she says. She has a lawyer but he doesn't want to get one.

What a demonic person that woman is. I would give her enough money to support the kid and not a penny more.
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PatrickGHBusan



Joined: 24 Jun 2008
Location: Busan (1997-2008) Canada 2008 -

PostPosted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 10:36 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

World Traveler wrote:
PatrickGHBusan wrote:
That cold approach is impossible line is BS.

I met my wife because I decided to go and talk to her. No one introduced us.

You told us a story about how you met your wife at a dinner party. How did you approach her? (Were there many people at that place?) Did you see her and then walk right up to her and introduce yourself?


Not that this is any of your business but I went up to her and talked to her...I know thats so crazy!!!!
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PatrickGHBusan



Joined: 24 Jun 2008
Location: Busan (1997-2008) Canada 2008 -

PostPosted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 10:39 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Los Angeloser wrote:
After 7 years of marriage and a son, my friend's Korean wife filed for divorce(he's got brown skin). She didn't like living in a lesser home when her mother/father lives in Gangnam Style apartment. The parents were never for the marriage so didn't attend it, about 18 months later after the wife dis-owned or refused to talk to her parents they met by chance on a public street. The father-in-law snuck up from behind my friend and hit him upside the head/ear in front of both their wives. The wives had to stop the father-in-law from hitting him again. After that accidental meeting on a public street my friend's Korean wife re-connected with her parents but all was down hill for my friend and the father-n-law will forever hate my brown-skinned friend.

The wife let's him see his kid about once a month while always demanding money, she wants it transferred through the banks but since she has basically taken his child away from him, he don't see why he should do what she says. She has a lawyer but he doesn't want to get one.


Horrible story, no one deserves to be treated this way.
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