Site Search:
 
TEFL International Supports Dave's ESL Cafe
TEFL Courses, TESOL Course, English Teaching Jobs - TEFL International
Korean Job Discussion Forums Forum Index Korean Job Discussion Forums
"The Internet's Meeting Place for ESL/EFL Teachers from Around the World!"
 
 FAQFAQ   SearchSearch   MemberlistMemberlist   UsergroupsUsergroups   RegisterRegister 
 ProfileProfile   Log in to check your private messagesLog in to check your private messages   Log inLog in 

social life with no (or limited) alcohol??
Goto page Previous  1, 2
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Korean Job Discussion Forums Forum Index -> General Discussion Forum
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Steelrails



Joined: 12 Mar 2009
Location: Earth, Solar System

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2013 9:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

This reminds me of the people who grip about being dragged to places with smokers.

If you don't want to be around booze or drinks, come up with alternative activities or places to go. If they say no, then oh well. But expecting people who like to drink or smoke to not drink or smoke without suggesting an alternative is just lazy and selfish.

Try a games night or going bowling or playing pool or going go-karting or go to the batting cages or the movies, heck anything. Odds are people will follow. The only reason they are at the bar is that no one has suggested anything better and the only place everyone can seem to agree on is a place with food and drink.

Don't be that lamer who gets dragged to the bar and then complains about everyone drinking. Let's hear your bright idea.

One more thing- A lot of these "I don't like booze and smokers" types tend to be highly picky people who don't like sports, have picky taste in movies, often have weird dietary habits, don't know many games, and have odd hipster hobbies that no one else is into. Thanks to them and the other picky types who raise a stink, everyone settles on the least common denominator for hanging out- a place with food and drink.

Guess what? That hipster phase where you got into weird stuff that no one else is into and wanted to be "above it all", is the reason you're feeling like crap at these situation. Don't complain that your unique interests aren't enjoyed by anyone else when your whole reason for being interested in them was that no one else enjoyed them.

Of course some people just can't handle getting smashed and enjoy not feeling like crap the next day and all the rational reasons for not enjoying a round at the bar, but a significant minority of them are the picky types I described above.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
dairyairy



Joined: 17 May 2012
Location: South Korea

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2013 11:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Now, steelrails, since when is it hard to find fellow booze hounds in Korea?
This is a thread for others who want to know what else there is to do besides drink yourself silly. This thread isn't going to cut down on anyone's "Happy Hour" crowd one bit. We're just giving some advice to those who want to do something else. Remember, when you first come to Korea it's ridiculously easy to find the "bar scene" but it can be challenging to find others to do other things. The 'drink 'til dawn" honkey tonk lifestyle isn't for everyone. Let them have their fun, too.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Steelrails



Joined: 12 Mar 2009
Location: Earth, Solar System

PostPosted: Tue Feb 12, 2013 12:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

dairyairy wrote:
Now, steelrails, since when is it hard to find fellow booze hounds in Korea?
This is a thread for others who want to know what else there is to do besides drink yourself silly. This thread isn't going to cut down on anyone's "Happy Hour" crowd one bit. We're just giving some advice to those who want to do something else. Remember, when you first come to Korea it's ridiculously easy to find the "bar scene" but it can be challenging to find others to do other things. The 'drink 'til dawn" honkey tonk lifestyle isn't for everyone. Let them have their fun, too.


You misunderstand my post-

I'm trying to tell the non-drinkers that rather than 'looking somewhere else', they should try setting up their own events and providing entertaining alternatives with their acquaintances.

The problem is them being so passive that rather than try to propose something and lead people in another direction, they declare them as 'degenerate' and then look for somewhere else and other people to please them.

Take control!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
kinship



Joined: 24 Jan 2013

PostPosted: Tue Feb 12, 2013 12:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
of the people who grip about being


I hope you mean-- gripe


Quote:
One more thing- A lot of these "I don't like booze and smokers" types tend to be highly picky people who don't like sports, have picky taste in movies, often have weird dietary habits, don't know many games, and have odd hipster hobbies that no one else is into. Thanks to them and the other picky types who raise a stink, everyone settles on the least common denominator for hanging out- a place with food and drink.


There is more to life than doing what you want everyone to do. I found that every western drinker I met, once they found out I didn't drink, would avoid me. Drinkers love to discriminate.

I had no problems with my Korean colleagues. They would never serve me any alcohol once they found out I didn't drink and they made sure soft drinks were always available.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
diver



Joined: 16 Jun 2003

PostPosted: Tue Feb 12, 2013 12:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

kinship wrote:
I found that every western drinker I met, once they found out I didn't drink, would avoid me. Drinkers love to discriminate.


I don't drink and that hasn't been my experience at all. Are you sure that's why they don't want to spend time with you?
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
kinship



Joined: 24 Jan 2013

PostPosted: Tue Feb 12, 2013 12:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

diver wrote:
kinship wrote:
I found that every western drinker I met, once they found out I didn't drink, would avoid me. Drinkers love to discriminate.


I don't drink and that hasn't been my experience at all. Are you sure that's why they don't want to spend time with you?


It is either that or my advanced age (92) that puts them off. Or the fact that I have to be in bed by 8 p.m. so I have enough energy to teach the next day or that they do not like partying to Bing Crosby or Tommy Dorsey music.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Hugo85



Joined: 27 Aug 2010

PostPosted: Tue Feb 12, 2013 1:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Steelrails wrote:
Don't be that lamer who gets dragged to the bar and then complains about everyone drinking. Let's hear your bright idea.


That.

"Why do we always go drinking"+"I don't want to go to a cafe/pool/baseball game/bowling/bike by the han/movie theater/hiking" = Make new friends

I have friends with whom I don't drink and have a lot of fun... some others just aren't fun.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
northway



Joined: 05 Jul 2010

PostPosted: Tue Feb 12, 2013 4:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

kinship wrote:
There is more to life than doing what you want everyone to do. I found that every western drinker I met, once they found out I didn't drink, would avoid me. Drinkers love to discriminate.


So: most of the Westerners who met you found you distasteful, for one reason or another. This seems perfectly in line with what we've come to expect.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
rambler



Joined: 18 Jun 2011

PostPosted: Wed Feb 13, 2013 7:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hugo85 wrote:
When I got to Korea I would just get smashed with other foreigners. These days I ... multibang.


Sounds like you're still having a good time, am I right? Surprised
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Captain Corea



Joined: 28 Feb 2005
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Wed Feb 13, 2013 6:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

diver wrote:
kinship wrote:
I found that every western drinker I met, once they found out I didn't drink, would avoid me. Drinkers love to discriminate.


I don't drink and that hasn't been my experience at all. Are you sure that's why they don't want to spend time with you?


Haha

I was thinking the exact same thing.

I don't drink... Well, maybe a beer or two per year, and have no issues with spending time with folks.

Find interests outside if the bar ... Or even gasp, during the day.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
KimchiNinja



Joined: 01 May 2012
Location: Gangnam

PostPosted: Wed Feb 13, 2013 7:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

sojusucks wrote:
...too many fellow teachers think going to a bar means drinking until you literally pass out, or run out of money, and that's any and every night of the week.


Yeah! That's Korean style. Cool

It's very easy to be victimized by Korea and wake up lying in a puddle of your own vomit. Shocked Confused
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Harpeau



Joined: 01 Feb 2003
Location: In Hannam-dong, Seoul.

PostPosted: Mon Feb 25, 2013 6:44 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm not a big drinker. either. Very few have hassled me on nights that I decide not to drink. People are typically cool with my having a ginger ale, or whatever. I think the point is: be proactive and make up your own fun!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website Yahoo Messenger
flash viego



Joined: 20 Jan 2013

PostPosted: Tue Feb 26, 2013 11:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

kinship wrote:
diver wrote:
kinship wrote:
I found that every western drinker I met, once they found out I didn't drink, would avoid me. Drinkers love to discriminate.


I don't drink and that hasn't been my experience at all. Are you sure that's why they don't want to spend time with you?


It is either that or my advanced age (92) that puts them off. Or the fact that I have to be in bed by 8 p.m. so I have enough energy to teach the next day or that they do not like partying to Bing Crosby or Tommy Dorsey music.
+

Hahaha
What about Lawrence Welk?
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Korean Job Discussion Forums Forum Index -> General Discussion Forum All times are GMT - 8 Hours
Goto page Previous  1, 2
Page 2 of 2

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum


This page is maintained by the one and only Dave Sperling.
Contact Dave's ESL Cafe
Copyright © 2013 Dave Sperling. All Rights Reserved.

Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2002 phpBB Group

TEFL International Supports Dave's ESL Cafe
TEFL Courses, TESOL Course, English Teaching Jobs - TEFL International