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Is dating harder for expat women?
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cmxc



Joined: 19 May 2008

PostPosted: Thu Jan 09, 2014 3:38 am    Post subject: Is dating harder for expat women? Reply with quote

An article in the Korea Times suggests that expat females may have a harder time than expat males when it comes to dating options in Korea.
http://www.koreatimes.co.kr/www/news/culture/2014/01/135_149481.html

From what I have seen, expat females don't seem to have any troubles finding dates. Expat females have their choice of dating Korean guys or fellow expats, including English instructors, military, and business expats.

You can check out the article to judge whether you agree with its premise or not, but a few choice quotes:
"Racial stereotypes can be a hurdle to dating in Korea as well. Kychele Boone, an English teacher here, said 'exoticization' of foreign women often extends to black women in ugly ways.

Men 'will come up to me or one of my friends, and try to speak urban slang, or say, "You’re black and wild in bed,’” she said, adding that in some cases, men have attempted to touch her or her friends inappropriately in public.'
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Speck7



Joined: 05 Sep 2012

PostPosted: Thu Jan 09, 2014 3:52 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

WHY is this even a topic for a newspaper? Seriously.
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World Traveler



Joined: 29 May 2009

PostPosted: Thu Jan 09, 2014 4:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

South Korea has a huge gender imbalance. There are more men of marriageable age than women. This complicates dating in Korea.
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Ginormousaurus



Joined: 27 Jul 2006
Location: 700 Ft. Pulpit

PostPosted: Thu Jan 09, 2014 6:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

World Traveler wrote:
South Korea has a huge gender imbalance. There are more men of marriageable age than women. This complicates dating in Korea.


That should make it easier for women, no?
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PatrickGHBusan



Joined: 24 Jun 2008
Location: Busan (1997-2008) Canada 2008 -

PostPosted: Thu Jan 09, 2014 3:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ginormousaurus wrote:
World Traveler wrote:
South Korea has a huge gender imbalance. There are more men of marriageable age than women. This complicates dating in Korea.


That should make it easier for women, no?



Indeed it does....
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World Traveler



Joined: 29 May 2009

PostPosted: Thu Jan 09, 2014 3:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yes. That was my point. There should be articles and threads about how it is harder for expat men.
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archaeologist5



Joined: 25 Dec 2013

PostPosted: Thu Jan 09, 2014 4:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Since I am not a woman I would not be qualified to answer the question BUT I am part of the problem for them. I would not date a Western women even if all the westerners in this country took up a collection and paid me to date one.

For the most part, they are more trouble than they are worth and because I hold certain strong religious beliefs (I would not want to participate in pre-marital sexual activities) my field of selection is rather limited.

HOWEVER, I do remember 1 western girl from about a dozen years ago I would be tempted to date. She was walking near the E-Mart in the Igok Dong area of Daelso-gu and she was really pretty. In fact she was so pretty she stopped traffic

She carried a pair of 45s on a very slender body and her face was more than one could hope for in a woman. How do I know she stopped traffic? Well a male co-worker was in a taxi the same day and he and the taxi driver spotted her. The taxi driver would not drive while she was walking along the street and he told me about his experience.

The taxi driver couldn't stop drooling.
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happiness



Joined: 04 Sep 2010

PostPosted: Thu Jan 09, 2014 5:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Im a guy, and Ive lived in Asia for quite a while. I wont make a blanket statement, but what I feel about quite a few Western women Ive met here is theyve lost some of their feminine qualities, having to be strong in these trying time.

Whats bad for Western chicks here is there is a different paradigm to compare to: Korea women. Theyre not the same, Would you eat only pizza every day? Well say you do, and then suddenly, theres spaghetti. Would you not want to try it? Or even if you eat cheese pizza everyday, and then suddenly, theres bulgogi pizza...its different and may or may not be a better value, more fun.

I have no problem with Western ladies if they have attractive qualities to me. As a guy, I just dont find alot of tattoed up, full-on attitude, boyish western ladies my thing, but of course, not everyone is like that, obviously... YMMV
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ATM SPIDERTAO



Joined: 05 Jul 2009
Location: seoul, south korea

PostPosted: Thu Jan 09, 2014 5:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I should make a new meetup group

Hook up with Korean dudes for foreign chicks

The problem is, Korean are more inclined to see someone as a sexual trophy instead of a long-term committed girlfriend.

Dating a foreigner is kind of like having a fling during your summer holidays.

Sometimes it leads to something beyond but usually that's not the case.

a lot of times, they'll have another girlfriend or something that they can't break up with.

Also, another problem can be how "cold" a western girl feels when you first date them. Texting all day isn't the social norm back home. So the Korean guy will harsh be into the girl at first until they sleep together a few times. but after the initial conquest, the guy gets what he wants and the girls start probably texting more conforming to the social norm of non-stop communication and prolly likes the guy more too.

that's when the guy starts being disinterested and eventually, it all fades into nothingness lol

You can label korean guys as "Shy" but there's a time and a place for picking up chicks and doing it at a bar or a club just isn't socially normal here. it's like how they don't customize their food when they eat. there's a time and a place for everything and sadly, the club isn't where they make their move LOL

we can interpret it as koreans being "shy" just like they can call us "selfish" or "childish" for asking for no green onions in our soup.

OR, (this is my message to the ladies)

you can 'man-up' and hit on a korean guy you think is cute

unless he's in a committed relationship with people who know the gf personally, the guy is gonna say yes lol it's a male-pride thing
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dairyairy



Joined: 17 May 2012
Location: South Korea

PostPosted: Fri Jan 10, 2014 6:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Expat women who make no effort at all with their appearances still get plenty of attention from Korean and expat men. That includes older women, fat women, and women with what could be called disgusting manners. We could blame it on the women but there are always some dudes who go for them no matter how they look or how they act. So why blame the women when it's dudes that still reward them for not caring?
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World Traveler



Joined: 29 May 2009

PostPosted: Fri Jan 10, 2014 6:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Gender imbalance. Eight women for every ten guys. They take what they can get. What else can they do (short of importing brides from third world countries)?

Quote:
In 1990, South Korea was experiencing a gender imbalance almost as high as China’s today and the highest in the world at the time.
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misher



Joined: 14 Oct 2008

PostPosted: Fri Jan 10, 2014 6:48 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I knew girls in my Korean language classes that had no problem getting dates. For the Japanese girls it was easy. For western women it wasn't difficult either. However the trend, particularly for the western girls (who were not from an asian background) was that they often got used for bragging rights and quickly dropped.
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FDNY



Joined: 27 Sep 2010

PostPosted: Fri Jan 10, 2014 6:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

This has nothing to do with race. If you keep yourself in reasonably good shape (NOT FAT) and are not a total retard, then you should be able to score with few problems. If you're ass looks like the back of a Mack truck and you wear sweat pants to bars, then you get what you deserve.
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Ginormousaurus



Joined: 27 Jul 2006
Location: 700 Ft. Pulpit

PostPosted: Fri Jan 10, 2014 7:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

World Traveler wrote:
Gender imbalance. Eight women for every ten guys. They take what they can get. What else can they do (short of importing brides from third world countries)?

Quote:
In 1990, South Korea was experiencing a gender imbalance almost as high as China’s today and the highest in the world at the time.


The thread is about dating being harder for expat women. Why do you insist on making it about the plight of Korean men dating Korean women?
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byrddogs



Joined: 19 Jun 2009
Location: Shanghai

PostPosted: Fri Jan 10, 2014 7:48 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ginormousaurus wrote:
World Traveler wrote:
Gender imbalance. Eight women for every ten guys. They take what they can get. What else can they do (short of importing brides from third world countries)?

Quote:
In 1990, South Korea was experiencing a gender imbalance almost as high as China’s today and the highest in the world at the time.


The thread is about dating being harder for expat women. Why do you insist on making it about the plight of Korean men dating Korean women?


Because that is what he does. How many times do we need to be reminded about the gender imbalance and declining birth rate? Rolling Eyes
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