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On Death and Loneliness
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Evangeline



Joined: 01 Mar 2008
Posts: 27
Location: China

PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2008 4:08 am    Post subject: On Death and Loneliness Reply with quote

Am I lonely ? I always ask myself this question.

The answer is YES ! Or else , how can I get so much time to think about such boring things!

First of all , I have to say that there are two parts in my high school life , which are called STUPID and PESSIMSTIC.

I wonder , might we be born again after our death?

If so , that would be wonderful and would mean that we wonít disappear but to lose all of our memory.

If not , that would be very very terrible!There would be nothing after our death , and we would disappear forever ! How long on earh is FOREVER? Is it one thousand years or one million years or even more? Of course not ! And none of us can imagine it.

I also wonder, even though our body werenít be existence , would our soul be lonely by then ? No matter how strongly I reject death and loneliness, it always turns out that I can do nothing to make any difference.

Iím sure Iíve thought too many,and theyíre over my limited capacity.Itís so dangerous a fact that I have been felling down for almost two months.I donít want to be mad ! Is there anyone I could turn to for help?
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Last edited by Evangeline on Sat Feb 14, 2009 5:57 pm; edited 2 times in total
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CP



Joined: 12 Jun 2006
Posts: 2875
Location: California

PostPosted: Tue Apr 08, 2008 8:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

We are born alone and we die alone. We do not know what we will experience after death -- maybe nothing, maybe something, maybe good, maybe bad -- until we die.

We all will die, so we all will find out, no matter whether we want to or not. No matter whether we like it or not. If death is just a long dreamless sleep, we know nothing, and there is no unhappiness.

In the interim, we have this precious gift of life. If you spend it bemoaning that you are alone, unhappy, unloved, you waste it. Do you want to remain alone? If so, be happy! If not, do something to be with others. Don't expect too much, and be happy with anything more.

You are in high school, so some things will be stupid, some things pessimistic, no matter what you do. But make everything else good, fun, happy, optimistic. You will never be this young, this strong, this free again. Make the most of being a teenager!

If you don't like it, trade places with me.
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You live a new life for every new language you speak. -Czech proverb
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Evangeline



Joined: 01 Mar 2008
Posts: 27
Location: China

PostPosted: Sat May 17, 2008 5:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

On May 12th,2008,a great earthquake occurred in the area of Si Chuan Province,China.About 22,069 people lost their lives by 14 o'clock,May 16th.What's worse,it is estimated there will be up to 50,000 deaths in this natural disater!As many buildings broken down,a large number of people became homeless and they were lack of medicine.





How terrible!It reminded me of my previous meaningless thoughts.

There exists lots of scenes which are sure to make me cry.For example:
1.The vivaciously-opened flowers---no matter how beautiful and vivid they are,they will have to fall finally! Why do they come out?Waiting for falling?! Crying or Very sad

2.Happy daily life---however wonderful man leads his life,he will have to die at last. What on earth does man live for?Waiting for death?! Crying or Very sad


Even these optimistic scenes can really make me sad,not to speak of the pessimistic ones.

I believe I have come down with a serious mental disease.Not until I am brave enough to be realistic about the pbjective law will I be healed.
And I am now making efforts....


----------------------------------------------------------------
Thanks for reading my struggle.The reason for long time no reply is that I have been searching for ways in which I can express myself clearly.However,I failed again and again.So my article still looks very very confused.I am terribly sorry to have caused all the trouble!
-----------------------------------------------------------------
In the end,let's pray for those who were and still are suffering from the earthquake!
And thanks for helping us Chinese!


Last edited by Evangeline on Sat May 24, 2008 5:46 am; edited 1 time in total
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Anuradha Chepur



Joined: 20 May 2006
Posts: 932

PostPosted: Thu May 22, 2008 5:04 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Motivational books, quotes, posters etc come in handy when a person is going through such a phase, and to help people break free from pessimism.
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hoby



Joined: 04 Feb 2007
Posts: 9

PostPosted: Thu May 22, 2008 10:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

just look at those victims in the earthquake.They had been deprived of the right to living on.Not even the rights of being longly or pessimistic.

You should appreciate it that you are still alive and can manage to be pessimistic.

Celebrating it that you survived!At this point of view why not be happy??
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to think being like this was just a moment in time....
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LeBron



Joined: 31 Oct 2007
Posts: 103

PostPosted: Sun Jun 01, 2008 10:11 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hello Evangeline,

at first I really can understand you and the questions you're thinking about. These questions are not boring, but no matter for how long you'll think about you'll never find an answer, I believe.

Maybe the sense in our life is to give our life a sense. You know to realize what we really want and to give our best to follow our goals...

Greetings,
LeBron
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Evangeline



Joined: 01 Mar 2008
Posts: 27
Location: China

PostPosted: Mon Jun 02, 2008 1:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well,all that you said above are quite reasonable.However,none of you exactly knows how my pessimism came into being step by step.

First,I am not getting well with my health.I can easily get serious illness while others not.

Then I was brought into a new class because of the classification of art and science. As time went by,I was shocked to find myself missing my old class since the new one was much too rude,cold and unfriendly.To them,my new classmates,I am an antigen!

After that came my best friend's death.We knew each other very well when we were young,and we grew up together.He was the only one that I could trust deeply. On hearing the hopeless news,I burst into tears and cried myself to sleep unconsciously.Believing that no one around me would ever become my real friend,I am now all alone with nothing but let my mind run wild.

I keep on thinking,worrying and hurting myself when these problems arise in my life,because I just can't help talking to myself and even trying to escape from the pain.

My stupid actions lead to a terrible result that I have bumped into an impass and can't go out,badly wounded...

However,I am still in favor of the idea that it's better to see the truth now,and accept it,than to fall into dread surprise on some day of weakness,and foolish to cry against fate.
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Last edited by Evangeline on Sat Feb 14, 2009 5:57 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Anuradha Chepur



Joined: 20 May 2006
Posts: 932

PostPosted: Mon Jun 02, 2008 6:22 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dear Evangeline,

Your English is good and you have presented your reasoning very well.
All of us here would be pleased to talk to you and hear your opinions on the other threads. There are lots of interesting topics discussed here.
So lets have fun talking on them.
I am sure you will make a lot of friends here.

Regards,
A-
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LeBron



Joined: 31 Oct 2007
Posts: 103

PostPosted: Mon Jun 02, 2008 8:45 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

There're some really sad things happened too you in your life. I'm sorry. I hope you'll find the force to get out of this crises. Maybe you can think a lil' bit more positively, even if it's hard to do so... Sad
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Evangeline



Joined: 01 Mar 2008
Posts: 27
Location: China

PostPosted: Tue Jun 03, 2008 6:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks for understanding me.

Recently,I've become afraid of night,for night is empty,quiet and dark.All these signs set a background for my wild thoughts.

I am lonely,especially late at night. When the colourful lights in the streets go out,the whole world seems to stop revolving,only my mind begins to wander.

What has caused my wild thoughts? The fear of death and loneliness.And it is my greed that has led to the fear.

First of all,I have to admit that life is wonderful,though there are doubt,fear and anxiety in it. I appreciate the mysterious life. However,I will lose all my consciousness and everything will be zero to me forever the moment my death comes. How could I accept the reality? I wish to enjoy the beautiful life as long as I want.

But it's obviously impossible for me to put off the date of death. So I started trying to find the value of my existence. I have got nothing but an idea that doing something useful,such as being a doctor and helping people,gives me an identity. On my point of view, only in this way can I say that I didn't waste my lifetime and my existence is to save more people.(Ps:When I was young,I dreamt of being a doctor for no reason.)

Unfortunately,it looks as if my ideal is to be broken by my weak spirit and body,which doesn't reach the standard where a superior doctor should be.

Maybe I am supposed to stop thinking so much,but these thoughts strike to me automatically.

Maybe my thoughts is a process of rescuing myself from pessimism,or it may be a chronic suicide.I can't tell! Shocked
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lotus23



Joined: 03 May 2008
Posts: 10

PostPosted: Wed Jun 04, 2008 3:58 am    Post subject: the same thoughts Reply with quote

Dear Evangeline:
The first thing I want to say is your strange ideas donít mean you are stupid or something like that. Actually, I have the same question like yours. I always wonder if there would be a new life after death, and what it would it be. Whatís more, I often think whether the existence of me is the result of several rebirths. Sometimes I usually think if I was some certain person in my last live and I would become anther different person in my next live. Just like what you said, we would not disappear, but just lose our memory and become the different person, which was quite similar with my thoughts. Maybe we were still ourselves but forget our last 100 years. In addition, I have a question as well. How do people know the things after death? I was impressed by one of my friendís response. She said the person who can speak doesnít know what the after death is and the person who knows what after death is cannot speak. I suppose thatís true. So who knows?

See, I have the same questions or ideas about death. I think that doesnít mean you are stupid. Donít blame yourself like that. This only means you think deeply about life and death. Actually, many people have this kind of questions like yours, especially the young and also including me and you. I suggest you to make more friends and open your heart. Iím very sorry to know your past story. But donít because of a few unfriendly people refuse all the people. In my opinion, most people are kind and nice. Find someone your can get along well with and talk to her or him. Then you may find they have the same ideas as yours! I hope we can become friends!
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Bob S.



Joined: 29 Apr 2004
Posts: 1767
Location: So. Cal

PostPosted: Wed Jun 04, 2008 12:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Evangeline wrote:
Recently,I've become afraid of night,for night is empty,quiet and dark.All these signs set a background for my wild thoughts.

Eh? Oh, the night is far from empty. That is when the grandeur of the universe really comes out. You just need to look up. The darker the night, the more of the infinite universe you can see. Lay back and absorb it all. Shocked Surprised Smile

Quote:
But it's obviously impossible for me to put off the date of death.
Who told you that? Of course you can put off the date of your death! There's all kinds of things you can do to delay death. Do you smoke? Stop! Drink less alcohol, and exercise more. See the effects of your life here.
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What is the use of living, if it be not to strive for noble causes and to make this muddled world a better place for those who will live in it after we are gone?
-Sir Winston Churchill
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Evangeline



Joined: 01 Mar 2008
Posts: 27
Location: China

PostPosted: Wed Jun 04, 2008 6:36 pm    Post subject: Re: the same thoughts Reply with quote

lotus23 wrote:
Dear Evangeline:
The first thing I want to say is your strange ideas donít mean you are stupid or something like that. Actually, I have the same question like yours. I always wonder if there would be a new life after death, and what it would it be. Whatís more, I often think whether the existence of me is the result of several rebirths. Sometimes I usually think if I was some certain person in my last live and I would become anther different person in my next live. Just like what you said, we would not disappear, but just lose our memory and become the different person, which was quite similar with my thoughts. Maybe we were still ourselves but forget our last 100 years. In addition, I have a question as well. How do people know the things after death? I was impressed by one of my friendís response. She said the person who can speak doesnít know what the after death is and the person who knows what after death is cannot speak. I suppose thatís true. So who knows?

See, I have the same questions or ideas about death. I think that doesnít mean you are stupid. Donít blame yourself like that. This only means you think deeply about life and death. Actually, many people have this kind of questions like yours, especially the young and also including me and you. I suggest you to make more friends and open your heart. Iím very sorry to know your past story. But donít because of a few unfriendly people refuse all the people. In my opinion, most people are kind and nice. Find someone your can get along well with and talk to her or him. Then you may find they have the same ideas as yours! I hope we can become friends!


Nice to meet you and many thanks for exchanging your experience with me.You've already given me great comfort! I am not lonely any more,because at least you have been in the same situation with me.

And if you don't mind,I just want to ask a question---how did you deal with it? Did you hold the view of starting a new life or disappearing or neither?

Probably it's merely a difference between materialism and idealism...

As for talking with friends heart to haert,I don't consider it a good way to relax myself. For one thing,I feel like,sometimes,it's easier to write down how I feel rather than talk to someone. For another,in a way it means that the one who I turn to is obliged to listen to me.

On the Internet,whether to join in the topic or not depends on each person himself.So I am pouring my mind here,eager to clear my head,stow my thoughts,and get feedback from different people.
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Evangeline



Joined: 01 Mar 2008
Posts: 27
Location: China

PostPosted: Wed Jun 04, 2008 6:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Bob S. wrote:
Eh? Oh, the night is far from empty. That is when the grandeur of the universe really comes out. You just need to look up. The darker the night, the more of the infinite universe you can see. Lay back and absorb it all. Shocked Surprised Smile


Yeah,I quite agree with you.However,as a senior high school student who is going to take the college extrance exam next year,I don't have much time to enjoy the grandeur of the universe. I do my homework late at night everyday, I am about to go to bed when the feelings of empty and loneliness suddenly strike to me. What's worse,I can do nothing but lie on the bed,feeling sad and frightened and falling into sleep unconsciously.


Bob S. wrote:
Do you smoke? Stop! Drink less alcohol, and exercise more. See the effects of your life here.


I am a girl of seventeen years old.I have never smoked or drunk,and I won't do that in the future.Because I hate the smell of cigarettes and alchols.

And thanks for your website to estimate the length of life. It seems to be a good result that my estimated life span is 78.04 years! Except for the low blood pressure and the low income level,I am in a good condition! Laughing
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Evangeline



Joined: 01 Mar 2008
Posts: 27
Location: China

PostPosted: Wed Jun 04, 2008 7:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Anyway,I would like to talk about the only benefit from my thoughts.

I am too frightened to accept the view of disappearing,so I prefer believing that we'll get a new life after death. And then I may be a plant such as vegetable,flower,or I may be an animal like rabbit,dog.

I will never find the answer.In other words,I can be everything,and everything can be me. Nobody is willing to hurt himself,so am I. Now that everything can be me,I should treat everything kindly.

It seems to be a ridiculous reasoning.However,I 've learnt to love everything.And from now on,I won't do harm to anything on purpose. Laughing
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