Joined: 18 Jul 2003
Location: south korea
|Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2003 3:46 am Post subject: love problems
|I have a question for you Daniel - A student ┼
I need your help!
I heard a lot about man and woman relationship and I though to myself I knew something about that kind of relationship, but it did not turn out that way when I was meeting my girl friends.
Special when I got angry with her, I could not think of anything else but say whatever came to my head, a far from listening years and patience.
On the other extreme, I would become obsessed with her when she looked lovely and pleased me.
So as far as love is concerned, knowing in theory has been proven different from doing in reality at lest to me,
I am not saying I do know a lot about that kind of relationship but what I want to say is that I can not realize even my little knowledge about humane relationships.
So is there any means to fill the gap.
*Through give and take. If you do something for her and she doesn't do anything the next time you ask her for a favor, stop giving to her the next tie she asks or expects you to give her something and she will ask why or she might think twice about why you are not feeling generous to her.
Am I too broad in my question?
No, but you need to give more examples in your next post.
*First of all. No one knows everything.
*it's good that you can appreciate her beauty. But what about what's inside her. What do you like or love about her personality, or her talents. In other words; is he capable of being affectionate, sweet, kind, patient, understanding, a good listener? Can she do these things without you always having to make a sacrifice for her?
*Second there is nothing wrong with showing you anger or displeasure with your girlfriend. But it is a good idea to try and choose the appropriate time and place for getting angry at her. It may not be such a good idea to angry in front of your friends or her friends, or in public.
-all you need to do say the right thing. Is to rehearse what you want to say. Think of something rational, sensitive and not too offensive; For example "Sweetheart I really care for you a lot but it makes me feel hurt when you don't say___________everytime I say something nice to you, or give you a present". Another example might be to look in their eyes and say their name "I Really care allot about you, I want us to have a happy and fun relationship, but it is difficult to me when it feels like I am doing al the work to make you happy, and I don't feel like you are trying to make me happy when I am upset, sad, or lonely"
Any way your advice will be appreciated.
P.S. I run a small column at http://www.english-online.co.kr
come on if you are interested to see more articles of mine.
Offering insigt and advice to people with questions or insights to relationships, marriage, and love.