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a letter of apology

 
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ziawj2



Joined: 22 Apr 2012
Posts: 18

PostPosted: Sun Mar 24, 2013 7:41 am    Post subject: a letter of apology Reply with quote

I have made an email appointment with my foreign language teacher, Peter Brown, but failed to keep it. Please help me check it in terms of appropriate style? Thank you!

Dear Peter Brown,

Iím really sorry about breaking the appointment we have arranged. Yesterday my mother was badly ill, I must come back home immediately. There is no time to see you this afternoon. I hope it would not bring you too much trouble. If it is possible, can we meet in tomorrow afternoon in your office? I have many views to communicate with you, and this would be helpful both for your teaching and our learning. Iím looking forward to meeting you tomorrow.

Yours sincerely,

Han Meimei
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Stephanie S



Joined: 16 Jan 2013
Posts: 54

PostPosted: Mon Apr 01, 2013 2:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dear Mr. Brown,

Iím really sorry that I will have to break the appointment we had arranged. Yesterday my mother became very ill, and I had to return to my home. Now I will not be able to see you this afternoon. I hope it won't cause any problems for you. Would it be possible to meet tomorrow afternoon in your office? I have a lot of topics to discuss with you, which would be helpful both for your teaching and my learning. I look forward to meeting you tomorrow.

Yours sincerely,

Han Meimei



Hope that helps. Wink
Stephanie
Elanguest, Malta
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ziawj2



Joined: 22 Apr 2012
Posts: 18

PostPosted: Mon Apr 08, 2013 4:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Stephanie S wrote:
Dear Mr. Brown,

Iím really sorry that I will have to break the appointment we had arranged. Yesterday my mother became very ill, and I had to return to my home. Now I will not be able to see you this afternoon. I hope it won't cause any problems for you. Would it be possible to meet tomorrow afternoon in your office? I have a lot of topics to discuss with you, which would be helpful both for your teaching and my learning. I look forward to meeting you tomorrow.

Yours sincerely,

Han Meimei

Thank you for your help.
I have some questions about your changes.
1. Why you change 'sorry about' to 'sorry that'? Is the reason that 'sorry that' is more frequestly used?
2. You changed ' my mother was ill' to 'my mother became ill'. Is the reason that 'became' is more active that 'was'?
Hope that helps. Wink
Stephanie
Elanguest, Malta
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Stephanie S



Joined: 16 Jan 2013
Posts: 54

PostPosted: Mon Apr 08, 2013 4:38 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dear Han Mei Mei,

When I read your letter, I was a little bit confused about whether you were sending it before or after the scheduled appointment was missed. I decided you were sending it right before. Is that correct?

Therefore I chose to say "I will have to break" (future tense), and because of that I changed "sorry about" (which is used before verbs ending in -ing) to "sorry that" which can be used before most verb forms.

"My mother was ill" sounds like it could have happened at any time in history. I got the impression that your mother's illness was an unexpected emergency, so "became ill" conveyed that meaning a little better.

I hope that helps. Smile (and I hope your mother feels better!)

Kind regards,
Stephanie
Elanguest
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ziawj2



Joined: 22 Apr 2012
Posts: 18

PostPosted: Mon Apr 08, 2013 4:54 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Stephanie S wrote:
Dear Han Mei Mei,

When I read your letter, I was a little bit confused about whether you were sending it before or after the scheduled appointment was missed. I decided you were sending it right before. Is that correct?

Therefore I chose to say "I will have to break" (future tense), and because of that I changed "sorry about" (which is used before verbs ending in -ing) to "sorry that" which can be used before most verb forms.

"My mother was ill" sounds like it could have happened at any time in history. I got the impression that your mother's illness was an unexpected emergency, so "became ill" conveyed that meaning a little better.

I hope that helps. Smile (and I hope your mother feels better!)

Kind regards,
Stephanie
Elanguest


Thank you very much for your explanation!
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Stephanie S



Joined: 16 Jan 2013
Posts: 54

PostPosted: Mon Apr 08, 2013 5:04 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

No problem at all. Smile
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