Job Discussion Forums

[etx]

It is of course heartening to see my many colleagues engaged in lively discussion of the finer points of English teaching abroad, but I do wonder if the focus of the discussions is not awry.

Indeed, the first question to ask yourself is not, "Which country would I enjoy most" or "Which certificate course would allow me maximum job prospects" but "Am I suited to being an EFL teacher?"

Here is an aptitude test to judge your potential suitability.
Please answer yes, no or sometimes.

1) Are you outgoing and enthusiastic?
2) Do you enjoy being the center of attention?
3) Do you like meeting people. . . and then saying goodbye to them forever soon after?
4) Do you enjoy being stared at?
5) Are the ideas of stability, financial reward and long-term relationships repugnant to you?
6) Do you know what "repugnant" means?
7) Do you enjoy washing your clothes in the bathtub?
Does the idea of going out with women or men who like you only because of your passport's color appeal to you?
9) Do you like strange foods cooked in less than sanitary conditions?
10) Are you fond of trying to defend American and British military policies?
11) Do you thrive on loneliness and uncertainty?
12) Do you like cutting up paper into small pieces?
13) Do you enjoy making yourself vulnerable to the whims of rich foreigners?
14) Is the smell of whiteboard markers much like a rare and sensual perfume to you?
15) Is the thought of owning more than one bag of possessions repellant to you?
16) Do you enjoy trying to converse with people who you have nothing at all in common with?
17) Could you easily dispense with such luxuries as a pension or Social Security?
1 Do you drink heavily?
19) Is hot water a luxury you can easily do without?
20) Does the idea of waking up early on a Saturday to try to entertain a room full of hostile nine-year-olds appeal to you?
21) Do you give a crap about the difference between the present perfect and the present perfect continuous?
22) Does the idea of paying $1500 to learn how to do something that you can't save money at sound perfectly logical to you?
KEY: For questions 1 through 21, give yourself:
2 points for each "yes" answer
1 point for each "maybe" answer
0 points for each "no" answer
For question 22, give yourself:
1000 points for a "yes" answer
0 points for a "maybe" or "no" answer
0 - 20 points == It would seem that your are far too sane to enjoy the EFL lifestyle. I'm sure that your local Kinko's Copy Shop or Starbucks would be happy to have you, however.
21 - 44 points == You show some signs of being able to adapt well to the EFL lifestyle. If you were to say, increase your daily alcohol intake and perhaps cut yourself off from your friends and family for a while, you might begin to fit the profile.
1000 or more points == Congratulations pal. You're a natural.

For more interesting thoughts on the bizness, go to www.englishteacherx.com.

[johnslat]

Dear etx,
What a great aptitude test. The only problem is - I scored 2 (I answered "Yes" to No. 21), so it would seem that I wasted 22 years of my life in EFL when I could have/should have been fulfilling my destiny at Kinko's or Starbucks.
Woe is I!!!
Regards,
John

[Aramas]

I scored 1002, answering yes to questions 15 and 22.

I must be born to it

[Ludwig]

'Etx', your website boasts of some quite witty sections, some of which had me openly laughing out loud. Thanks for the link and a laugh! It is good to see that you do not take yourself overly seriously.

[Lanza-Armonia]

1) Yup!
2) Who doesn't?
3) Yes....and no....
4) Not a lot but does wonders for the ego!
5) What does 'repugnant' mean?
6) See 5
7) Yeah, why not?
The Chinese one is the same colour as the British one. What's the prob?
9) Hell, Joe and I and a buncha friends use to love sipping a beer and 'meat on sticks' playing pool in a village in the middle of China, someplace!
10) Not at all. They're all wank�rs
11) No....and yes....
12) My favourite pastime!
13) Nah, I'm one of um!
14) What have you been smoking?
15) Repallent?
16) If anyone knows Norm, you already have the answer, hey Largy and Ginger?
17) Pension and SS? I'll never reach the age...
1 With the help of Joe, hell yeah!
19) Yeah, but I enjoy the occasional bath.
20) Normally, they entertain me!
21) Not two fecking hairs on my bollox!
22) To the Chinese it does, so it MUST be right!!!?

What's me score?

LA

[shmooj]

[Ludwig]

'Shmooj', maybe you are right, but no one can say it is not at least original!

[johnslat]

Dear Ludwig,

[naturegirl321]

Darn, the website is blocked! Guess you must have things that threat Chinese security