Job Discussion Forums

[taikibansei]

An interesting thread. One thing that I haven't seen mentioned yet is the additional difficulty of adjusting when one's spouse is Japanese. As I've shared before, in my particular situation, my wife desperately wants us to return to Japan, and has been urging me to apply for positions at Japanese universities accordingly.

Because of this, there is the real chance that I might be returning to Japan this coming spring--am in the final stages of negotiation for two different jobs currently. Of course, as I state in another post, "tenure"--indeed, long term job stability in general--for foreigners is such an unreliable thing in Japan. Furthermore, while I still do like Japan a lot, the thought of growing old (and eventually dying) there is more than a bit unsettling. Still, unless someone comes up with a magic formula to make my wife happy here (and I've tried a large number of things...), I may, for our marriage's sake, have little choice.

[Sherri]

taikibansei
I really sympathize with your wife. I believe that it is much tougher for the "foreign" wife to raise children in her non-native country than it is for the foreign husband to reside and work in his non-native country. I lived in Japan quite happily until I had children, then expectations and my function in the community drastically changed. I absolutely hated it. Most of the time, it is the wife who has to deal with education, health and neighbors on a day to day basis. I am not saying that the husband does nothing, but it certainly became my role.

I also felt sad that my kids were not learning the same songs and stories that I learned as a child. I became highly critical of all things Japanese related to childcare and education. I lost confidence in being able to help my children in their studies at school or if they had questions about their community (not to mention the bi-cultural issues). I did not want my children to be embarassed at school because their mother was "the gaijin" and could not speak Japanese well.

It is so much less stressful for me to be in the US. I can talk to my kids' teachers and doctors naturally and interact with the other parents. It is like a huge weight was lifted for me. Quality of life is higher here overall (comparing rather unfairly rural Hawaii and Tokyo!).

My husband is almost daily telling me how happy he is here. He has escaped a life of nightmarish commutes, and a salaryman's life--of course it is better here. We both breathed a huge sigh of relief when we returned here after a week in Tokyo.

I hope you can find a solution for your family whatever it works out to be. As for myself, I never want to return to live in Japan but I would be happy moving to another country or place to teach or explore.

Regards
Sherri

[abufletcher]

EFL professionals should come with a printed warning for prospective spouses: "Danger! May result in protracted periods of cultural detachment."

I'm not sure my own Mexican wife knew what she was getting herself into when she married me shortly after coming to the US. Not more than a year after we were married "we" took a job in Kuwait and ended up staying overseas for almost 20 years. During much of that time she was the only Mexican around and in some cases one of a very small number of Spanish speakers. Still as long as we were both abroad, it was a neutral third culture for both of us so that somehow made things easier.

In terms of Taikibansei's situation, one big thing to consider is what kind of future do you really want for your children. We enjoyed living in Japan "as foreigners" with our three children going to Japanese public schools. But the cultural novelty of seeing your kids in their elementary school uniforms and going to school presentations in the taikan starts to wear off as they move on to middle school and the prospect of having to deal with high school entrance exams. Although all three of our children are virtually fluent in Japanese the likelihood that they could get 80% or better on Japanese state exams to be able to enter a good local HS was extremely unlikely. Even our youngest son who started his schooling in youchen with the other Japanese kids wasn't able to get over 50% on most subjects. My daughter's scores hovered around 25% with a ranking somewhere in the lower third of the class. She was an excellent student and got 4's and 5's on most of her report cards -- but that kind of success didn't translate into good scores on state exams.

The only real way to beat this MIGHT have been to accept what is a fact of life to most Japanese, namely that their children are going to have to attend after-school (and Saturday) jukus until late into the night. We personally could not accept this oppressive way of life -- or pay the thousands of dollars a year it was going to cost us.

The prospect of having her have to go to a "home economics" focused HS was enough for us to decide that she needed to leave Japan and we arranged to have her live with my sister in the US and start high school there. Luckily when it was time for my boys to start HS I had a sabbatical year coming up and so I moved the family to the US at that time. But now I'm solo back in Japan and only get to see my wife and kids during vacations.

Long and the short of it? Are you truly willing to give up your expat/short-time soujourner status and become an "immigrant" subject to all the rules and frustrations and prejudices of people who truly adopt a country vs. those just passing through?

Japan is a nice place to visit but I wouldn't want to "live" there (subject to all the strictures of Japanese culture and society).

[taikibansei]

Sherri,

Yeah, I think the education/child rearing element is a major contributing factor. Both my wife and I are bilingual enough to handle 99% of the stuff that comes up in either country. However, there's always that one percent when, as a non-native speaker, you are completely confused and don't know what the heck is going on. Whenever that happened to me in Japan, I could take a kind of comfort in knowing that, culturally, most fathers (Japanese or otherwise) were not expected to understand fully what's going on with their kids--indeed, the reaction to my various misunderstandings was a knowing humor. My wife, however, feels that she has to be perfect, that she must try to do everything herself, that she is judged here as much as she ever would be in Japan. Hence, she finds the 1% that she just doesn't get absolutely humiliating.

Of course, it doesn't help that our kids' teachers literally freak out when she enters the room, that they asked me (in front of her) if our kids were adopted ("because they look foreign..."--we've now gotten this bizarre question 6-7 times in the US, from teachers and medical staff.... ), that they talk to her (when they do) like she is retarded. And no, this has not been just one school--we're talking about multiple schools in first Missouri and now Idaho.

Also, compared to Japan, the level of education locally is a joke--first grade math in Sabae is the equivalent of 5th grade math here, and, judging from her attempts at written correspondence, I'm not sure my oldest son's 1st grade teacher can read or write (in any language). Then there's the issue of daycare--twice the price we paid in Japan for fewer hours. Health care, too--I'm tenure track at a major state university with the best coverage available in the state...and like most Americans, am just one major family illness away from losing everything.

Probably, one compromise would be moving to another, more family-oriented and international, state. Hawaii sounds great--of course, on a faculty salary, I probably couldn't afford to live there!

[taikibansei]

[abufletcher]

First, I would never for even one moment consider condemning my own children to a Japanese university education. And I say this as a full-time university professor at a Japanese university. Obviously there are good and better universities in any country but the nature and traditions of Japanese universities seem to me to undercut the very spirit of learning I would hope my children emerge with. As you say it's getting easier and easier to get in. At my university we still give (and I still have to write) entrance exams. This is apparently just for show as the results are no longer used for any purpose since we accept virtually anyone who applies (and more and more that frankly just shouldn't be at any university anywere). I wouldn't see this as a plus for my children.

Nearly all the international university students I've spoken to in Japan are less that satisfied with their educational experience. I'm not talking about exchange students there for a year but rather students from, for example, Bangladesh and Mexico, who are doing either a BA, MA, or Ph.D. on ministry scholarships. Many find their Japanese degree to be of far less "value" than an US or UK degree would have been back in their home countries.

For us, attending an American university was always a given. And while yes our kids' math abilities were well ahead of their American counterparts upon our return to the US, their English skills, despite our best efforts at home, were well below those of their classmates and in fact it's taken us two years to battle our youngest son out of the ESL/LED ghetto" into mainstream classes. My oldest son has made great efforts to achieve in English and is a straight A student in all his subjects but his score on the verbal section of the SAT will be typical for most highly motivated EFL learners and won't compare well with the top end of US raised college applicants.

But then I assume that if you and your wife are intending to spend the rest of your lives in Japan then you also have no problem with having your children living and working in Japan.

Your wife does sound like she has had to put up with a lot in the US. But maybe the real problem is living in Idaho and Missouri. BTW, I find myself contemplating this same fate as I apply for tenure-track positions in the US midwest.

[abufletcher]

BTW, I'd be very interesting in hearing your views on your experiences teaching at your US university and on the prospects of getting through tenure review as opposed to the likelihood of getting a "lifetime employment" position at a Japanese university.

I currently have application packages in to four US universities but find myself unconvinced that living in the US is the way to go. I'm also considering applying at the American University in Cairo.

[taikibansei]

FWIW, I've taught full time at three US universities and part time at a number of others--including schools in California and New York as well.

First, you'll find that many of the issues and frustrations you currently have with Japanese students will mirror exactly your reactions to students in the US. Just like in Japan, a large number of students get in who don't care, who don't prepare, and frankly, who shouldn't be in college. In forums like the Chronicle's-- http://chronicle.com/jobs/forums/ -- this is one of the major complaints, and I'd imagine this is true of the faculty in every country in the world. Also, just like in Japan, the exchange students here complain about the poor education and lack of social opportunities at their US schools, claiming that they should have gone instead to England, Australia, the moon, etc.--again, the nature of the business.

Before I discuss getting tenure, I should note that getting hired from Japan is quite difficult. First, a surprising number of US departments don't recognize teaching experience overseas as counting for anything--you'll need to explain carefully in your cover letters what you did and why it should count. Also, publications are extremely important. Full time assistant professor English positions at most 4-year US universities now attract 100-200 applicants each. Most of these applicants will have a PhD, multiple years teaching (even if just as a TA)...and increasingly, several refereed articles and/or a book at press or out. Hence, you need to be publishing and presenting now to be even considered for an interview.

This need to publish is especially critical if you are applying from overseas. Because of the distance, perceived additional expense (e.g., reimbursing air ticket costs for a campus interview) and possible problems (e.g., will the applicant have time to get a green card for his/her spouse?), departments will hesitate to consider you. This is also why your cover letters are critical--make it clear there why you should be considered/called. (The Chronicle forum--url provided above--is a good place for additional advice.)

Tenure...depends on the university. Make sure before accepting any position that, at the very least, you know their requirements. Depending on your publication record, see if you can negotiate the tenure clock down as well. Also, if you're invited to a campus interview, ask politely about how difficult it is to satisfy the tenure requirements. Some schools (e.g., most of the Ivy schools) are notorious for almost never giving tenure to their assistant professors--they apparently prefer to raid the ranks of their competitors. However, other schools prefer to promote from within. E.g., I've currently satisfied my requirements here, and am reasonably confident I will get tenure in two years.

Pm me if you (or anyone else) has further questions.

[Brooks]

I think it must be hard for a Japanese to live in
Missouri or Idaho. I know one Japanese professor of linguistics who lives in western Michigan and came home one day to find JAP spray painted on her lawn.
The cops didn`t think it was such a big deal, much to her annoyance.

[johanne]

taikibansei

I was sorry to read about your wife's experiences with public school in Missoiri/Idaho. I would hope it was just that particular place and that if you were in a more multicultural area of the U.S. this wouldn't happen. I taught Grade 1 in Vancouver and had about 90% ESL parents, many who were beginner to low intermediate level English speakers and it was always possible to communicate with them. It's not that hard to explain if a child is doing well, having trouble in reading or math or having social problems. In cases where the parents really had no English we pulled in translators from the local community. It sounds like you wife is a fluent English speaker so what you describe is truly unacceptable. In the schools were I worked in Vancouver, almost all the teachers were able to clearly communicate with parents given a basic English level on the parents' part. Really, it's part of the job. Perhaps is just a matter of exposure. Teachers who aren't used to non-native speakers, no matter how good their English, get flustered when they meet one. This isn't an excuse, though, just a possible explanation.

[taikibansei]

Thanks, everyone. Yes, the comparative lack of other foreigners in both areas is the main problem--teachers, medical staff, clerks, etc. are just not used to dealing with non-native speakers. I mean, it's not at the point you see in rural Japan--where children stop in the street and point, shouting, "Look Mom, a foreigner! A foreigner!"--but it's close....

My wife would love to live in Vancouver...the problem is finding a good job there as a non citizen. The coastal states are good options as well--though again, those positions are very competitive. Better start getting some more aps out....

[Gordon]

[abufletcher]

I think we all need to accept that there is really no way to make ends meet "back home" without two full-time incomes. The idea of being able to support a family on a single income is a thing of the past.

In many ways the closest thing to my own life growing up as a child in the 60's has been our life overseas. Our kids played freely and without constant adult supervision. We didn't have to arrange "play dates" with other mommies and daddies. We didn't have to drive the kids back and forth to school every day.

To be perfectly honest that has been what the expat life has been all about for me rather than an particular interest in any particular culture. For me, Japan is just "the next country" and I always feel I need to be completely honest about this when asked by my student why I've come to Japan. They are so used to hearing sappy "Chicken Soup for the Soul" type stories of foreigners' fascination with Japanese culture or love of Japanese food.

BTW, here are two questions my students almost invariable ask any foreign visitors:

1: Can you eat Japanese food?
2. Do you like Japanese girls?

I don't recall ever having been asked either of these questions during my 10 years in the Arabian Gulf! Either one would be the interesting topic for an extended essay on cultural assumptions.

[parrothead]

I guess it's better to leave a country while you still enjoy it there than when you can no longer stand it anymore.