Job Discussion Forums

[TokyoLiz]

I have no trouble meeting Japanese male friends, and I have a number of good foreign friends, too.

All my friends have vibrant interior lives. They're deep thinkers. Not all of them speak English. All but two of them are my sempais. When I want to talk about Life Stuff, I talk to my sempais. I don't have a lot of time to see them, maybe once a week over dinner. One of my sempais is my boss, who takes time to talk about important life things, cross cultural stuff, and educational issues.

I have very few female friends I can talk to, foreign or Japanese. It's hard to find opportunities to meet women my age - Japanese 30 something women are either busy being married with children, or busy working to death.

For the most part, I like my life here - I have a decent job, eat well, dress well, travel in Japan, see my friends regularly, meet new people, persue lifelong interests (Japanese cultural stuff and hobbies I brought with me from home), and save money.

The only hard part is being seperated from my loved ones (my brother in Myanmar, my family of friends in North America), not all of whom can visit me here.

[Montbell]

As somebody else here pointed out, the Japanese experience can be vastly different even for the same person from one month (year) to the next.

My first 9 months in Japan were hell. Well, maybe not exactly hell, but I cried every day. I finally bailed out and ran back to the US. And I was speaking Japanese and working for a company. Not as bad as in the movie "My Japanese Friend" but you can get the picture.

And then in the US, I acquired a Japanese husband (wasn't looking for a Japanese guy, it just happened) and off to Japan we went.
I realized I really liked it there, even though my mother in law is THE Wicked Witch of the East.
I didn't have much contact with other foreigners, had no problem making Japanese friends, had no problem getting work and making money (and spending it).
Now, due to my husband's job we live in Europe, and we are counting days until the end of his contract.

Japan is what you make of it. Keep an open mind and let things happen, and you will do just fine, anywhere in the world.

[Serendipity]

I'm often asked by Japanese people, "When are you going back to England?". It often stops me in my tracks because I can't think of a reason to go back.

I've only been here 4 years but I've completley fallen for this country. I just can't leave. The language, the countryside, Tokyo, the people (quirky ones please), safety, combinis, making a living, etc, etc. I struggle to find things I don't like although there are things I still can't comprehend (salary mens' lifestyle, for one).

The danger is to lose ones identity. No matter how well I speak or know, I'm a gaijin. On the flipside, I've lost touch with English culture (music, government, TV). I see my friends name on "chat" sometimes but we don't have anything to talk about anymore. I guess that's a downside: being in the no-mans land between cultures.