Job Discussion Forums

[nickelgoat]

Now that I`m on a roll, wondering about anorexia, I thought I`d write about my top peeve in Japan. I live in Hiroshima, and there is a covered street mall nearby called Hondori. It is always crowded, and the vast majority of people there, I would say, are under 30.

Often, I hear giggly laughs - the best way I can describe them are their similarity to the Betty Rubble giggle on the TV show "The Flintstones". Most of you probably know what I`m talking about. But those giggles and squeals are coming from the GUYS! I teach at a local university as well and whenever there are a few college-age guys together, that high-pitched feminine squealy giggle makes itself present. Whenever I call on my male students in class to answer a question, the giggles start, the face covering, the outright silliness. Overall, my female students do a much better job and answer my questions! A lot of the guys also seem to be wearing pink shirts and feminine colors.

This kind of behavior would be called effeminate in most places I`ve been, and I wonder how this gets socialized in families? Aren`t the fathers spending time with their sons? They are there, certainly, but either aren`t showing their sons things or just focus on breadwinning and letting the sons basically be raised by their moms only.

That is what bothers me most about Japan - what are called "parasite singles". Part of the issue is old people not letting go of their jobs until well past 65 or 70, so young people can`t get started, but the materialism here is so rampant, as if all these teens and 20`s have to do with their lives is go shopping and try to put together outfits that make them look exactly like their favorite models. This goes for both sexes. It is nice to live at home with your parents, but they have so much money to burn and they don`t seem to be saving at all.

I know this is just a rant, but these things do trouble me, so I wanted to hear reaction from others. Thanks!

[Brooks]

my wife says real men live in Kyushu.
Tokyo has a lot of gender benders.

Although not always, I think Japanese women are stronger than the men.

[PAULH]

[ironopolis]

[Glenski]

[PAULH]

[guest of Japan]

"Where I come from, men with umbrellas are seen as highly effeminate. They never would be in Japan. "

I use and umbrella and even wear a scarf (muffler) in the states.

PaulH, your rent quote for San San Francisco is low. I'm in Boston renting a very tiny studio for $1100. I'm looking into a 1 or 2 bedroom for September and am expecting to pay about $1350. I'm not even in the heart of the city, but I am looking for convenience.

San Fran is slightly more expensive than Boston.

[Sweetsee]

Good luck finding a place in San Francisco, over the bridge maybe.
It must be one of the tightest rental markets in the States.
Sure is nice, though!

[ironopolis]

[nickelgoat]

Ironopolis, about the umbrella thing - do you mean a man holding an umbrella would be seen as effeminate whether it was raining or not? I see a lot of women holding them to keep the sun off their faces, is this what you mean would be seen as effeminate if done by a man, or anytime holding an umbrella at all?

[gaijinalways]

Sounds more like a parasol. I don't know if that's what he meant.
The ideal man in Japan looks a bit androgenous, but if Japanese women are happy with it, so be it.

As to Neets and parasite singles, yes, you can't really be considered a parasite when you are still a university student. Most people at the stage in life are still supported by their parents.

Staying at home can be a boon, if you're saving your money. Italy also has a high percentage of adult singles living at home.

Handling money is slowly eroding as Japanese aresaving less money. In the US though, we are hardly a better role model; i.e. lower saving rate. But, I will say I think most young Americans have a better handle on finances than the average young Japanese adults.

[nickelgoat]

Actually, there are quite a few women in Japan that will not date or marry a Japanese man, believing they are too effeminate or cold emotionally. A new trend seems to be favoring dating Korean men, who are seen as more macho because they have to serve in the military.

Americans are, I admit, bad savers. We binge on the credit cards as well. I think Americans (I am one) are beginning to wake up to the challenges posed by high gas prices, etc.

But somehow, Japanese young people seem more vulnerable to advertising lures. They look exactly like they are modeling wherever they go. In America, people don`t seem to care as much, just preferring to be relaxed and with friends who like them for being who they are.

[6810]

Thank the relevant deities(s) for Japan's effeminate men.

It's nice to be able to go for a walk or a skate in even the seediest areas of most places, late at night, or even just hang...

and not get verbally or physically assaulted by a group of loudmouth, drunken overweight slobs with nothing to do but beat the shiznit out of people. Not even having to think about it makes a welcome change from walking even down town in a "safe" area in somewhere like Sydney, let alone LA or New York.

So, unlike glenski, who finds male femininity hard to stomach...

I will take the perms, shag cuts, make ups, tight jeans, hand bags (woah, this is veering off in a direction!) as well as the dorks, glasses, freaks and even the Jp jocks who are for the most part better mannered and not as quick to aggression as their hyper-testosteroned western counterparts.

In fact, there is a whole other conversation to be had here about masculinity/feminintiy east/west and beyond - but I have too many essays to mark!

Ciao!

And don't forget your handbag!

[markle]

So what is it that get's your goat? Are the boys giving you a woodie and your not comfortable with that so you feel the need to belittle them?

[ironopolis]