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[Endie]

Hey all,

Just a question to fulfill my curiosity.

How did people around you react when you told them you were moving to Mexico?

For me, my mom was supportive. My dad grudgingly so. My friends were supportive too although some acquaintances gave me a face. Basically, they were wondering WHY ON EARTH would anyone willingly move to Mexico?

I guess it has to do with the whole stereotypical image of Mexico... all Mariachis, sombreros, tequila, ponchos, pueblos, donkeys, cacti, and POOR (except for sunny Cancun). I had a coworker of my mother actually fall silent when she gushed about how proud she was that I was to teach at a school in Mexico in the coming new year.

So i guess my question to you is -- WHY ON EARTH did you come to Mexico?

My own reasons are that I had a good number of friends from here that I had made in Canada. And from the few visits I�ve made beforehand, I fell in love with the culture, scenery... and last but not least I had fallen in love with a certain lady from here. haha.

[TheLongWayHome]

Some questions and comments I got...

Do they speak Mexican?
How many vaccines do you need?
Don't they have donkeys instead of cars?
There are electrical wires everywhere.
It's hot.
Is that where Speedy Gonzales comes from?
There are more churches than hospitals.
Don't get kidnapped.
Don't get rabies.

[ontoit]

Not Mexico, but it was adventure and a taste for something that might put a few curves into the road I was driving on.

Lots of positive support, good lucks and keep-in-touches. There was one response, though, that hasn't faded even after nearly 20 years. A teacher I was working with looked at me in disbelief and asked in a tone that implied that she though I had lost my mind, "Why would you want to do that?"

I guess I remember it so clearly because every day is a reminder of what a great idea it was to start this adventure instead of simply locking into the routine that had made that woman's life so bitter.

[hlamb]

I had a lot of people telling me how dangerous Mexico is, especially people who have never been here but have heard it's dangerous. Since i burn easily and can't spend long on the beach, many people told me I was crazy because I'd spend the entire year peeling. They don't seem to realize that Mexico isn't all beach and that there are places to go into to get out of the sun. Others told me not to hang around with Zapatistas. A coworker who had been to an all-inclusive resort for a week told me not to worry about learning Spanish, since all Mexicans speak English. I didn't bother to explain to her that if that were true, I wouldn't have a job here!

The above reactions were generally from people who don't know me too well. My family and close friends were and are very supportive. After all, they know my thirst for adventure and learning about other places. Many started booking plane tickets to come and visit me, which has ensured a nice line of visitors for me this year.

I somehow think, though, that I decided to settle here permanently, the reaction would be different...

[M@tt]

friends were curious and supportive. i didn't get any stupid questions.

parents were less than enthused. my dad openly wished i would choose another country, like norway. he doesn't like mexicans. my mother was a mother--she worried about my safety, my sanity, my health, etc.

i think my brothers forgot after awhile, then when i was home over christmas one of them asked "which country do you live in?"

the only assumption almost everyone makes that is not correct is that it's hot here. i get frequent comments about "well, you must be hot all the time" or "how do you make it without a/c". when i tell them about the climate most people are envious (indiana is pretty awful for 4-5 months of the year, including july/august).

lately more people have been expressing envy of my lifestyle, which includes lots of travelling and not much work. nobody has moved here yet, though.

[danielita]

Most people were very supportive of the idea--they know how much we love to travel and it was only a matter of time before my husband and I did something like this. Everyone says they are going to come visit, but they don't realize that Mexico is not just Cancun, Acapulco, Tequila and Senor Frog's.
I always get asked "where in Mexico?" and because it's not Cancun, I then have to give them a short geography of Mexico lesson, which is then followed by "How far from Acapulco is that?"
My sister can't figure out why and my mother-in-law says that we'll be back very soon. Others just tell me that I need to pack sunscreen (duh, my husband and I are both chicken white) or ask me about where I will be living. My favourite comment was from my sister, (who is 34 years old) when she found out we were driving there..."OH! I didn't know you could DRIVE to Mexico from Canada! I thought you had to ship everything"

So, there have been mixed reactions, some good, some bad, some bewilderment, but that's what you get, when you do something that is off the beaten path....

D

[Perpetual Traveller]

[geaaronson]

I made sure I flushed out the most honest responses, not just the phony supportive, �Hey, wow, I think you`ll really have a great time�.
A coworker seemed to think that it would actually advance my career!!! He has been immensely successful in the past two years as he has gotten a fulltime university position and is under contract to write a 4 book manual for his discipline, followed with a possible another 5 books from a major American textbook publisher.
He thought a trip to Mexico might clear my head and get me on the road to endeavors similar to his own.
My boss thought it not such a bad idea but did not have such a high opinion of Mexicans as I do.
One brother protested that he thought my professional achievements would diminish as the distance from the US would prohibit publication, exhibition (I am an artist)in America and I would not have much opportunities in Mexico. Actually the opportunites are greater as it took me 10 years to get a showing in my US city municipal gallery, and only 5 moths here in Mexico.
And another brother thought I was naive in thinking I would easily merge with the native population and become a Mexican �like them�. This is a brother who knows that I think of him as more than occasionally naive so he thinks the same of me. To this I told him, that in most likelihood, despite my intent to blend in the woodwork, yes I would stick out like a sore thumb and my social circle would mostly consist of expats. Interestingly, I was initially more sought after by Mexicans than fellow Americans and only recently have fellow gringoes interest in my social company surpassed that of Mexicans.
(which proves how much more open MXans are, and how closed Americans are)

[M@tt]

that was a pretty big logical leap you made to that conclusion, especially if you're basing it on experiences with expats (many of whom are not interested in being with other expats!).

fair enough though. i've found friendships here to be disappointingly superficial and not very important to the hundreds of mexicans i've known. they are typically more friendly than americans upfront but the honeymoon soon wears off. talk to them about it and they'll probably tell you the same.

this does not mean that mexicans aren't nice people! i do have friends here who i enjoy being with but i know the friendship will never be as important to them as it is to me. i'm sure this has historical roots and is also related to the way families are.

[TheLongWayHome]

[Samantha]

One point not mentioned is that it makes a huge difference if you are fluent in Spanish or not. It is hard to make really close friends in this culture without speaking Spanish, so the language barrier can leave foreigners feeling pretty lonely.

[geaaronson]

Thanks Matt-
I suspected as much about Mexican friendship. It has always been my supposition that the social butterfly is the one with the lightest wings.

[Endie]

I think it depends, on the friendship thing. It�s difficult to try and generalize for a whole group of individuals and I think it�s best to just take every individual for what they are.

I�ve had some Mexican friends that have stayed close to me since the time I�ve met them (2 years ago) while others have lost touch. So it varies, i think.

Having a common language definitely helps!

Here in Monterrey a lot of Mexicans speak English so it�s not unusually hard to communicate, but having at least a basic to moderate understanding of Spanish will make you look less ignorant and therefore a lot more friendlier!

[corporatehuman]

My dad told me:

I'd get sick. Verrry sick.
Don't buy any drugs.
The police are all corrupt. They will rob you.
Don't trust anyone. They will rob you.
Be careful. They will rob you.

Comments from my friends and you'd swear I was going on a suicide mission. I still think half of them don't expect me to come back.

And people that didn't know me...were confused when I told them I was going to Mexico. Most of the time their first question was "Why?" Then they paused and congratulated me on a good idea, though they were lying.

After a few responses like the above, I just stopped telling people. And instead, I just went!

In terms of the friendships, I've only been here two weeks...but I'm surprised. I came to Mexico with little or no Spanish, but I've made a concerted effort everyday to speak Spanish, whether it be correct or not, and that effort, regardless, has been well received. Always at least try to speak the language. I feel like I've made some very good friends already...


- Chris

[TheLongWayHome]