Job Discussion Forums

Sheikh Inal Ovar · Joined: 04 Dec 2005 Posts: 1208 Location: Melo Drama School

To what type of pasture are TEFLers put out to graze?

Will their last years find them reclining like a champion in his oats filled paddock ... or will old age find them clinging to a tatty straw 'kiss me quick' hat, the last reminder of their sartorial heydey when they used to plod up and down Blackpool sands ...

How do you think TEFLers end up in old age?

dmb · Joined: 12 Feb 2003 Posts: 8397

Baba Alex · Joined: 17 Aug 2004 Posts: 2411

I drink a cup of virgin's blood every morning, that should keep me young for the rest of my life. That's why I get away with telling people I'm only 28.

Sheikh Inal Ovar · Joined: 04 Dec 2005 Posts: 1208 Location: Melo Drama School

dmb · Joined: 12 Feb 2003 Posts: 8397

What are 6 and 7?

Sheikh Inal Ovar · Joined: 04 Dec 2005 Posts: 1208 Location: Melo Drama School

Stage 6

Suffocating in the Gulf, TEFLer throws himself over the edge ...

Stage 7

Outwardly similar to idyllic Stage 1 in that TEFLer is found sipping coffee at a cafe table in the square of a picturesque town ...

But the comatose eyes with which he stares at all before him tell quite a different story ...

molly farquharson · Joined: 16 Jun 2004 Posts: 839 Location: istanbul

i'm glad i'm a woman and not a man, as my future as an old person is clearly much better than what you look forward to sheikh

Sheikh Inal Ovar · Joined: 04 Dec 2005 Posts: 1208 Location: Melo Drama School

I'm bailing out after stage 5 ... and will be off to see the wizard to get patched up ...

It should be remembered that stage 6 and 7 are based in imaginative fancy as the creator of the "Seven Stages of TEFL" was unable to obtain a rational, coherent response from any of the stage 6 and 7 TEFLers interviewed ...

Still, even their lot is a happier one than the TEFLer whose epitaph reads:

'Here lied the Vicar over the unmourned death of TEFLer Jones'

dmb · Joined: 12 Feb 2003 Posts: 8397

thrifty · Joined: 25 Apr 2006 Posts: 1665 Location: chip van

It will have to be as I am getting fatter, lazier, more alcoholic and bitter as every day goes by. Gulf TEFLers-Jesus Christ. Chip van here I come.

dmb · Joined: 12 Feb 2003 Posts: 8397

thrifty · Joined: 25 Apr 2006 Posts: 1665 Location: chip van

Nice one dmb. The only thing besides the drink and money that was keeping me going was the thought that when I am in mobile catering, I won`t be so fat, bitter, alcoholic and lazy.

Best go and get another brew on the go.

dmb · Joined: 12 Feb 2003 Posts: 8397

Do you think it is possible to be a lazy mobile caterer? It doesn't seem to collocate.

thrifty · Joined: 25 Apr 2006 Posts: 1665 Location: chip van

If you get a Kurd in to do the work, it is.

justme · Joined: 18 May 2004 Posts: 1944 Location: Istanbul

But that would give you even more time to be fat, bitter, alcoholic and lazy.

Unless the Kurd had one of those funny Tourette's-like tics. Then at least you would be laughing your way to the bank with all the sweet sweet money he was earning for you...