Job Discussion Forums

[codedals]

[king kakipi]

codedals

does your girlfriend refer to you as "my A-hole bf"................?

[furiousmilksheikali]

I agree with Jim and his C-wife. What is the OP's problem?

[partialtone]

He doesn't have a girl to put an adjective in front of?

[markle]

I have an inkling what the OP is talking about.

I is pretty common for the predominately white anglo males that populate this board to refer to their 'better halves' as thier 'J gf' or 'J wife'. When is the last time some one said "my Canadian/American/Australian/British wife/gife. (sure it happens but at no where near the propensity) Sometimes it as kdynamic said it is relevant but more ofter than not it isn't. It reminds me of the ajarn.com in Thailand wher every guy that had a local gf or wife would always make it very clear that the poor girl was either a University graduate, had her own business etc in a desperate attempt to pre-empt any prejudice that she was a bargirl. I did the same until I found myself doing the same until i relised I was doing it, that it was absurdly condescending and stopped.

[Yawarakaijin]

[SeasonedVet]

The OP has thrown out some food for thought. I don't think I have ever given it much thought before. It's not something I would dismiss lightly. It seems to be a relevant point for discussion and thought.
However the OP did start out a little " on the angry side" apparently, but it's difficult to judge feelings from text so ...

markle wrote:

[codedals]

Ah!
For a bit there, I felt I was venting to the people about the people (not a good thing). Hell, I half expected to come to this thread today and find my digital self drawn and quartered. It's good to see that I have a few supporters -- thanks Markle and Yawara for clearing some things up.

I wasn't trying to ruffle any feathers, but it seems that my topic has done just that. My point was to bring about the realization that Markle wrote about. When you toss out those adjectives too freely, you're only impressing the people that you are capable of impressing, and if anything, trivializing the person you care about. I'd also guess that most are doing it without even being aware of it...

And, Seasoned, glad to have helped, and check out this article, esp. part 3:
http://www.pointlesswasteoftime.com/misery.html


Keep in mind, this thread was created very tongue-in-cheek:
Read it expecting to laugh, then you'll laugh.
Read it expecting to get heated, then you'll get heated.
Read it expecting to get a new perspective, follow the bouncing ball...

[partialtone]

Haha, well call me insensitive (I am), but I just don't see getting heated over something that's so unimportant. I made a few jabs because it just seemed funny to get so militant over the subject. I don't expect everyone to agree with me as I am pretty far from being pc, but really, why care so much about what other people do?

[furiousmilksheikali]

Apologies to the OP if he thought I was coming down too hard on him. However, if someone sets out to write a post berating people for their poor writing style it seems a little hypocritical to pay no attention to ones own.

[Mothy]

I agree with furiousmilksheikali that an example of how it was used poorly on this board would have helped the OP's case. All the times in recent posts that I'm aware of, the statements of "my japanese wife/gf/whatever" had something directly to do with the subject, such as cultural/language problems. A little clarification as to when he finds the nationality of the significant other irrelevant would be nice. I know I have used the phrase "my Japanese wife" in a post before, but in my opinion it was relevant to the topic. If my use of it is something the OP has a problem with I would appreicate a little more explanation as to why.

[codedals]