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[Nashledanou]

OK, nobody had ever assured me that the Czech landlords (or landlords in general) were a whole bunch of honest gentlemen. But what I really didn�t expect was to be confronted with outright racism against alleged 'southerners'.

I�ll start from the beginning.

I�ve been living and working as an English teacher in the Czech Republic for 13 months now. This January I was in need of a place to stay; an Israeli friend of mine offered me to take one of the rooms in his newly rented apartment in Tr�i�tě 7, Mala Strana � an excellent location � on the obvious condition that I would give him a monthly contribution for the rent. To put it simply, I was subleasing on the basis of a gentleman�s agreement (some may already grimace at reading about yet another example of utterly na�ve behavior). What I counted on was the fact that my friend had struck a deal (albeit only an oral one, alas) with the landlord, whereby he was openly going to share the flat with other people in order to relieve his financial burden. In other words, the landlord � Jan P�sl, an allegedly powerful Czech layer � knew perfectly that someone else than the contract holder would dwell in that abode; and this is crucial, given the fact that he himself works and resides in the same building (which he entirely owns � it�s the one which includes the �Gitanes� restaurant), on the top floor, one above mine, hence having the possibility to constantly monitor the tenant(s).

For five straight months he had been seeing me walking in and out of that flat: he knew who I was. But one night, about two weeks ago, I came back at around midnight and found out that I was missing one of the four keys needed to enter the place � namely, the last one, which opens the apartment�s door. The other three opened the building�s main, second and mezzanine doors. So I made it as far as the last barrier before my much-craved bed, before realizing that I couldn�t proceed any farther. I then tried to call the two other people I lived with: my friend, who was then at his girlfriend�s, said that he did not have his keys with him, and the other flatmate was 80 km outside Prague, on a brief holiday. Chance had it that the landlord was then standing on the balcony of his own flat, from where he silently watched me making these calls. Eventually I resolved to ask him for help.

�No, no�, he replied. �You don�t pay, you don�t enter�.

But I did pay, I argued, knowing that my friend had already taken care of the financial matters � indeed he had �, and besides the end of the month was still a couple of days away. The problem was another, though, as I quickly found out.

�No, no�, he concluded. �You negro face, you stay out�. And he turned his back on me and disappeared inside his apartment.

�Nigga face�? Did he refer to my suntanned complexion, due to my ancestry (half German-American, half Italian) and my tendency to enjoy the sun? On the spot, I chose to ignore this quip � maybe I had misheard, or he was joking� I was certainly pressed with more urgent problems: first of all, sleeping somewhere more comfortable than the landing. Back in Prague after an exhausting four-day working trip, carrying two heavy bags, at my wit�s end, I decided to try and open the door in an unconventional way. I had been taught by my Israeli friend to unlock it by sliding a stiff object (another key, or a credit card) into the slot between the door and the jamb, simultaneously nudging the door... Difficult to explain without a practical example or a drawing, this trick would get me off the hook in emergency situations such the current one. So I tried, probably without much coordination or with excessive force, because the door did slam open, but my intervention caused its already disgraced condition (the lock was held together by tape) to worsen. But hey, I though, I�ll pay for whatever, I just want to sleep right now�

Nothing was furthest from what was actually going to happen. The landlord furiously rushed downstairs, stormed into my room, grabbed me by the jacket and started thrashing my around. He slammed me onto the floor, against the balcony table, and all along he kept screaming �negro face, negro face�. We brawled for a few minutes, after which I (15 cm shorter, 40 kg lighter and extremely tired) finally decided to yell for help. The restaurant owner, who lived downstairs, came up, separated us and also acted as a translator for the following scenes, since neither my Czech nor the landlord�s English helped our already faltering mutual understanding. Basically, what happened was that the landlord accused me of trashing the door; he wanted the contract holder to be summoned right away; as soon as my friend had arrived, he was told to get rid of me immediately; and since the contract was signed by him only, and being the landlord a lawyer, my friend (a lawyer himself) found himself to be the underdog and was therefore forced to comply. So he helped me out with packing up and after a few hours I was out, homeless, sleepless and vagabond.

My friend and I eventually settled the matter between ourselves. He told me that as the sole responsible for the apartment he would take care of the door (and he did); he then left for Israel, so nobody was living there anymore (the third roommate left too).

After a few days, I found out that I still had the three keys on me and decided to return them to the landlord. Why?, one may well ask. Well, the keys were his, and I also wanted to give him a chance to apologize for his �ungentlemanly� behavior � maybe he was high on something, or maybe drunk? At any rate, I didn�t feel as if I owed him anything but the keys. He thought differently.

I showed up unexpected at the front door and rang the doorbell; he buzzed me in and I went up to his office on the first floor, where he was waiting; I told him I had keys for him. He smoothly invited me into his office, only to suddenly lock the door and start calling the police. I decided to stay calm despite his constant trying to intimidate me � he commanded me to sit down, demanded my passport, my address, eventually my money for the door. He claimed that my friend, now untraceable, hadn�t done anything for it. Throughout this second act, he completely disregarded the keys I had brought back and systematically refused to interact with me, except to threaten the use of violence if I tried to escape (furthest from my mind; I wanted to see to what lengths he would go) and not to miss his chance to call me �negro face� again. I also heard him scoff over the phone that I was Italian (�je Ital, je Ital��), as if trying to buddy up to the interlocutor � �just another one of those dagos��, maybe.

While unsuccessfully trying to recall the Czech expression for �false imprisonment�, I waited for as long as more than 30 minutes till a policeman finally arrived. This lad was most willing to have us close the matter as soon as possible, but the lawyer insisted that I had to pay for the broken door. We eventually went to the police station, where after a while I was granted a much needed sworn interpreter, who informed me that charges had been pressed against me for forcible entry into my ex landlord�s private property and that he would withdraw such charges only on condition that I paid 12,000 Kc (!!) for the door. He also deemed it a good idea to jazz up the story by adding some gratuitous details, for example that that night I had �hit him, kicked him, bitten him and smashed a chair on his head� � whereat I burst out laughing (and the policemen with me). He had also doctored some paperwork in order to sucker the police into believing that the contract had already expired two months before I was there; luckily the available documents proved him wrong.

At last I managed to give my version of the facts. The police, initially a bit hard-eyed (yet always polite), increasingly warmed to me and eventually let me go with a handshake and a smile. They had gradually understood that my position as an offender was simply grotesque.

In conclusion, I can only note that since the Italians have always had a great sympathy for the Czechs (I know this for a fact), it is all the more sad to be faced with such intolerance and blatant racism on the part of a Czech lawyer.

*PS the actual expression he used was not "negro", but a very similar word that would result in a *beep* on this forum.

[spiral78]

ah, the good old days (and nights) in Mala Strana!

Beware those second, third, and fourth-party rental agreements. Better to pay a reputable agent's exhorbitant fee and make sure everything's on paper, including your name and obligations.

Please allow me to make a general moral to the story, though I think it's a bit disrespectful to your bad experience to do so! I'm honestly not saying that what happened to you is at all justified!!

But it's such a great example of the kinds of bad luck that one can get into when living in a culture/language one doesn't understand. This isn't to be avoided, but the rub is for those newbies who want to try the adventure without any financial backup. It takes so little to end up panhandling for enough cash to call your family back home!!

Obviously not your case, Christopher - you've clearly got the resources (financial, social, and emotional) to handle such an occurrence. But I've seen several newbies (which you also are not) get into serious trouble in similar situations.

[Nashledanou]

Yes, this story is a great teaching. I hope, at least.


PS I don't have anything to hide, Spiral, but of all posters, I thought you would have been the last to publicly reveal my actual name

[spiral78]

Oh, no! I'm seriously sorry!! A glass of wine too many, and honestly feel terrible about it.

You're absolutely right to call attention to this, as it's yet another good lesson for forums like this - anonymity is honestly the best policy.

Heartfelt aplogies. Truly.

[Nashledanou]

no worries