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alexrocks
Joined: 13 Feb 2006
Posts: 75
Location: Kyoto, Japan
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 Posted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 3:52 pm Post subject: |
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| AndyH wrote: |
One more thing: Most of the people who I knew as complainers in Japan were the types who let every little thing bother them: If they "only" got a one hour lunch break one day instead of the usual hour and a half, or perhaps they had to come in to work 30 minutes early because of a trial lesson. These types of things will annoy you to death-if you let them.
They would also make no attempt to make Japanese friends, and would do nothing to try to learn the language or grasp an appreciation of the culture.
Free time would be spent with co-workers in bars, and in the end, they'd bi tch about their year (if they lasted that long) in Japan being a "waste of time". |
Ditto. Those people annoy the hell out of me, too. |
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alexrocks
Joined: 13 Feb 2006
Posts: 75
Location: Kyoto, Japan
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| Posted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 4:02 pm Post subject: |
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| gaijinalways wrote: |
I think it kinda depends. Since I'm married now, I don't go out a lot period, but I do it witha Japanese person who ahppens to be my wife. 
Making friends here takes time, and you might be surprised how fleeting it might be with both Japanese and foreigners alike. Something about living abroad, people come and go, both physically and mentally. |
Yeah, keeping friends here is hard. Nowadays I only bother going out of my way to make good friends with people who I know will be here for a while, which typically means they have Japanese spouses. |
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taffer
Joined: 03 Nov 2006
Posts: 50
Location: Japan
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| Posted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 4:23 pm Post subject: |
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Making good friends, lovers or times for that matter should not be on a clock. The quality of an experience is not determined by quantity- but by the you guessed it...Eternal love of the woman happened in 3 weeks. Eternal worship of another man, a wise man, happened in 10 DAYS and then I was gone. Don't discriminate against a one because he or she is a goer or a stayer.
Ridicule what I typed above today, but if you stay out here long enough, you will come to know that what I say is true.
You can meet a moment with a person and get a lot out of that fusion. Don't time it. Dig it.
Last edited by taffer on Fri Sep 14, 2007 1:04 am; edited 1 time in total |
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gaijinalways
Joined: 29 Nov 2005
Posts: 2279
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| Posted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 5:12 pm Post subject: |
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| I don't regret the friends I've known here, but unfortunately living abroad does tend to accelerate the process of people departing here. Society is more mobile than it used to be, so it is more likely that people you know will not be life long friends. Of course there is email and other ways of staying in touch, but both parties need to make the efort. |
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TokyoLiz
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Posts: 1548
Location: Tokyo, Japan
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| Posted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 1:08 am Post subject: |
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Taffer wrote
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| You can meet a moment with a person and get a lot out of that fusion. |
Taffer appears to have embraced ich go ichi e. When you're a traveller, sometimes this is the healthiest way to be.
As for staying put, I've got a few very good Japanese friends who rely on me as much as I rely on them. That's a lot.
Don't lose heart, folks. |
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