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Patrique
Joined: 19 Sep 2007
Posts: 16
Location: Toronto, Canada
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 Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2007 5:16 am Post subject: Some good advice from a friend of mine |
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I got this email from an old friend of mine who had worked in Japan who I solicited for advice. I really liked his email and thought maybe some of you might find it useful and/or inspiring as well. Or maybe it's just me...
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i, too, received mixed feelings and stories while gathering info before i went. although 'westernized', japan is very much asia and very much its own thing and so that hits people in different ways. i met a lot of people who, altough liked the money they were making and the vacations they could afford, were not living a 'good' life. that is to say were not very happy. i also encountered folks who adjusted well and thrived and seemed at one with their surroundings. these people were always the ones who, among other things, took the daunting task upon themselves to learn the language. i'm sure you've been told this already but i'll say it again...start learning japanese right now. go and buy a book and start small. you will not just pick it up by being there. i knew people who lived there for years and could barely say hello. if you go to france or spain or germany etc. you can kind of learn through osmosis because, structurally, the languages are similar enough to english. japanese might as well be martian. syntactically it's almost a mirror image of english so it takes a bit to wrap your head around let alone your tongue. thankfully it's pretty easy to pronounce and you don't have to worry about tones like mandarin or thai(they do make use of pitch or intonation but it's kind of like whatever...it usually doesn't change what your saying). knowing some japanese and actively learning it while you're there will not only be personally rewarding and get you laid more, but will lessen the culture shock when it hits a few months in.(this sounds gay but read about culture shock and how to deal cause it sucks) secondly: make some japanese friends. this kind of sounds like "well doi" but it's not as easy as that. when i moved to tokyo i had some friends there and so i hung out with them and their friends. mostly english teachers. there was a whole lot of bitching about japan going on and not a lot of exploring. i said *beep* this, dug out my lonely planet tokyo and started exploring on the weekends. this was cool and the city kept me intrigued checking out its nooks but i felt very much the outsider looking in. i then had the good fortune of meeting becky. she was a fashion photographer who freelanced and did some work for the magazine. we became friendly and then more so and i fell into her world. now while i could do without the fashion scene and the endless parties, what was key about being with her was that she was hooked up. she spoke excellent japanese she had real japanese friends. suddenly i was with people who knew what was happnening. they knew what the signs said. they knew that there was the best little pub in the world tucked away on the 6th floor of some random building that was the coolest room you've ever seen, served dope food, had cheap drinks and every girl was like a dream. it was tough at first when it was japanese a mile a minute and i didn't get any of the jokes and i felt a little hopeless but it just kind of clicked one day, without me realizing it, and i had a whole conversation in japanese. we weren't talking quantum theory...just shooting the shit but afterwards i was like hey i'm fucking getting it! that was a good godamned feeling but it was hard work getting there. third thing: do some kind of organized something. sport, music, dance, yoga, martial art whatever...just something where you feel part of a group outside of work or whatever. that's about it bro.
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gonzarelli
Joined: 20 Jun 2007
Posts: 151
Location: trouble in the henhouse
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| Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2007 5:32 am Post subject: |
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Your friend offers excellent advice. Learning the language is key and making Japanese friends helps a whole lot. I was very friendly with the staff at the eikaiwa I worked at when I first got to Japan. They took me out at night and introduced me to their friends. It snowballed from there. Oh the memories.
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chollimaspeed
Joined: 11 Sep 2007
Posts: 120
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| Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2007 6:02 am Post subject: |
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| gonzarelli wrote: |
Your friend offers excellent advice. Learning the language is key and making Japanese friends helps a whole lot. I was very friendly with the staff at the eikaiwa I worked at when I first got to Japan. They took me out at night and introduced me to their friends. It snowballed from there. Oh the memories.
Just for kicks: |
Definitely learn the language. Don't try to learn it in romaji, though, get stuck into hiragana and katakana and graduate to kanji when you're ready. Take lessons as you won't pick up very much simply from having conversations with people until you have a fairly good foundation. |
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flyer
Joined: 16 May 2003
Posts: 539
Location: Sapporo Japan
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| Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2007 6:25 am Post subject: |
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Yes I pretty much agree with his comments
learning the Language will give you a much better exp in Japan |
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Glenski
Joined: 15 Jan 2003
Posts: 12844
Location: Hokkaido, JAPAN
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| Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2007 8:25 am Post subject: |
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Learning some of the language before (and after) you go... well, that's just intuitively good sense. I don't particularly care for your friend's remark about using it to get laid more, but everyone has their priorities.
Learning the language is not easy for most. Not only is it different, as your friend wrote, but even though you are immersed in it, you have to make the time to study. That means sacrificing time with fellow foreigners and even with Japanese (not every Japanese person can teach), sacrificing time you would otherwise spend exploring (and the allure of any foreign country is strong), and finding ways to practice it. Like our students, you can't be afraid to make mistakes.
Make Japanese friends. Well, yes, that helps, too. They (and many long-term foreigners here, for that matter) do indeed know the places to go and see, but you need to realize that it takes quite a bit to get truly close to them. Be aware (and beware) of the language leeches and the women who are only interested in trophy foreigner boyfriends.
Your friend's points are valid, and there are more things to add. I'll chip in 2 more:
1. lifeline.
Have one back home. Isolation even in the large cities of Japan can be tough. Write or call regularly (not necessarily often). Don't lose touch with friends or family, but be aware that after a month or two here, you will not get email answers immediately. People's lives move on, and you are in their memories, just not as strongly because you are out of sight. Also, keep abreast of what is going on back home (online newspapers are good).
2. adaptation.
You don't have to "become Japanese" while living here, but learn to accept certain things. This is not your culture, and it won't change just because some things are different back home. Lots of people suffer hard because they think things (especially business matters) should be like they are at home. Nope. You can maintain your individuality and culture a lot, but you are going to have to compromise some if you want to appreciate this place. Pick your battles (times to complain), and know where and how to do it. Otherwise you will just end up like the people your friend wrote about, the ones who get together only to complain. |
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