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Do you ever get together with Saudi friends?

 
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Dominic-Pax



Joined: 20 Oct 2009
Posts: 77

PostPosted: Tue Jan 12, 2010 11:11 pm    Post subject: Do you ever get together with Saudi friends? Reply with quote

Do you ever get together with Saudi friends? If Yes, how is it? If NO, why?
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freesoul



Joined: 09 Mar 2009
Posts: 240
Location: Waiting for my next destination

PostPosted: Wed Jan 13, 2010 11:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Most Saudi male students can be very friendly outside classroom, but you just have to be aware of your school unspoken regulations regarding socialising up with your students.
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desert_traveller



Joined: 28 Nov 2006
Posts: 335

PostPosted: Wed Jan 13, 2010 12:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

during my years in saudi arabia, i came to realise that 'friends' mean something totally different to me and a saudi person, just like so many other words have totally different underlying concepts

after that, i only 'got together' with my saudi 'friends' if (1) i needed a favour from them, or (2) they needed a favour from me and (2a) i owed them a favour, or (2b) i could anticipate a good counter-favour from that person sometime in the future

this way, 'friendships' worked extremely well to both parties mutual satisfaction and benefit
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cmp45



Joined: 17 Aug 2004
Posts: 1475
Location: KSA

PostPosted: Wed Jan 13, 2010 1:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yes I have. Meetings/ gatherings with Saudis are generally polite and superficial. However, this is not always the case as I am sure there are people that are able to get beyond superficialities...it all depends on the context and how long you have known the person.
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Sadebugo



Joined: 10 May 2003
Posts: 524

PostPosted: Wed Jan 13, 2010 11:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I could never stay up late enough to socialize with the Saudis. I began work at 7am but they stayed out into the wee hours of the morning.

Sadebugo
http://travldawrld.blogspot.com/
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cmp45



Joined: 17 Aug 2004
Posts: 1475
Location: KSA

PostPosted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 12:22 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sadebugo wrote:
I could never stay up late enough to socialize with the Saudis. I began work at 7am but they stayed out into the wee hours of the morning.

Sadebugo
http://travldawrld.blogspot.com/

Smile
heh a very valid point...I passed up invites for this very reason too.
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Kalima Shahada



Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Posts: 198
Location: I live in a house, but my home is in the stable.

PostPosted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 10:16 am    Post subject: Re: Do you ever get together with Saudi friends? Reply with quote

Dominic-Pax wrote:
Do you ever get together with Saudi friends? If Yes, how is it? If NO, why?


Absolutely! I have quite easily made many friends with Saudis, both in the KSA and around the world! They have treated me with the best hospitality anyone could ever expect! When invited to their homes, they treat me as a member of the family - just the way the Koran expects.
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Kalima Shahada



Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Posts: 198
Location: I live in a house, but my home is in the stable.

PostPosted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 10:30 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

cmp45 wrote:
Sadebugo wrote:
I could never stay up late enough to socialize with the Saudis. I began work at 7am but they stayed out into the wee hours of the morning.

Sadebugo
http://travldawrld.blogspot.com/

Smile
heh a very valid point...I passed up invites for this very reason too.


That's why they offer their home to you (if they are a true friend). And you should stay for the night at least because the meals are often extremely late and people like to socialize until well after 2am and periodically sleep during the day. I guess you have to adjust to the different customs if you are going to work in a foreign country.
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desultude



Joined: 19 Jan 2003
Posts: 614

PostPosted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 10:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sadebugo wrote:
I could never stay up late enough to socialize with the Saudis. I began work at 7am but they stayed out into the wee hours of the morning.

Sadebugo
http://travldawrld.blogspot.com/


That, and women only parties get too boring. There are the pleasantries, food, more food, coffee and more food. Sitting around the edge of a room until the dancing would start, Followed by more food. This is not a criticism of Saudi women, just a predictable outcome of same sex parties in the ME. (I have really had a great time at same sex parties elsewhere, but the beverage and entertainment possibilities were less limited.)

But the Saudis I met at mixed parties were great fun.
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Cleopatra



Joined: 28 Jun 2003
Posts: 3657
Location: Tuamago Archipelago

PostPosted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 5:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
during my years in saudi arabia, i came to realise that 'friends' mean something totally different to me and a saudi person, just like so many other words have totally different underlying concepts


Good point. SAudis - and Arabs in general, I would say - have a fairly pragmatic view of friendship. Saudis reserve their deep affection mostly for their family, and friendships tend to be based on mutual benefit. This doesn't mean they are 'using' you - favours are reciprocal - but it does mean that 'friendship' doesn't mean as much (or as little) as you might be used to.

Quote:
That, and women only parties get too boring. There are the pleasantries, food, more food, coffee and more food.


I went to a few such events for the 'experience' but now turn down all invites to weddings, however plush. Aside from the extreme lateness - they don't even get going until after 11 at night - they really are terribly dull, exactly as you describe. Plus, why do they force you to sit on horrid hard chairs with 100 watt bulbs at an evening social event?


Last edited by Cleopatra on Fri Jan 15, 2010 8:16 am; edited 1 time in total
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trapezius



Joined: 13 Aug 2006
Posts: 1670
Location: Land of Culture of Death & Destruction

PostPosted: Fri Jan 15, 2010 12:42 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

No. Because I don't have any Saudi friends, if I exclude students.

Some of my students have become my friends, though, and I socialize with a select few of them once in a while (ex-students only).
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scot47



Joined: 10 Jan 2003
Posts: 15343

PostPosted: Fri Jan 15, 2010 5:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

My experience is the same as Trapezius. I sometimes meet with students, but I am not sure that I have - or have ever had - any Saudi "friends".
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