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The Dead Thread (one)

 
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Grendal



Joined: 13 Aug 2009
Posts: 861
Location: Lurking in the depths of the Faisaliah Tower underground parking.

PostPosted: Sun Jan 31, 2010 10:57 am    Post subject: The Dead Thread (one) Reply with quote

demigod wrote:

Urggh!! We are all losing sleep and bashing the bishop has become trends here in Najran, Saudi Arabia. The dead monkey is pressing forward and we are running for cover. I toss and turn at night in a cold hotel room. I can feel its wet tongue licking my neck and drooling on my scalp. I wake up in the morning cold and feeling violated. I am scared because the dead monkey can appear in many forms. It is poking the local laundry mat workers. My shirts are returned two sizes smaller and sometimes with bleach stains on colored material. Our western clothes are replaced with Saudi thobes that are too long. They are very comfortable, until you have visit the restroom. The dead monkey laughs at you because you tip- toe through brown water. The monkey pokes your thighs because you forgot the toilet paper and it hurts to squat using Eastern toilets. The spray doesn�t work and the water cohesion turns the bottom of your white thobe, doo doo brown.

So many valued customs stand on opposing sides. The memory of fresh flowers and running water soothes the mind. The sun bakes the body, as pay day becomes the only motivating factor in Najran. The days and nights quickly pass, but the smell of sewage lingers in our hotel. The days are glaring and the nights are cold. The apparent hate from the Eastern teachers have provided meaning to an already dismal experience. The attempt of building bridges has only cemented defence positions. The random verbal light fire provides brief entertainment. We have learned that the greater the smile from Eastern teachers, the more hatred is brewing inside of them. The more the dead monkey is poking them.. Islam teaches us to be patient and humble, but this means that we have to let people run all over us? Does it mean that we just bend over and let the dead monkey have its way with us? In the west, we are taught to beat the crap out of anyone, who attempts anything insulting. The dead monkey has even learned to play mind games. It has divided our work force and it is eliminating the western teachers at will

I find myself wearing thobes on the days that I believe the dead monkey is sleeping. Urgghh!! The monkey doesn�t sleep�it is just poking other individuals. I find myself wearing pants or Paki. Clothes, when the dead monkey takes the form of locals and teachers alike. It�s our defence mechanism that is permissible only for a short time. The dead monkey has learned to take different shapes and forms. The dead monkey has even kept our passports in an undisclosed location in the Rimas hotel. I can see that dead monkey. I can see its rotten fingers wrapped around our passports and copying information. I CAN SEE IT, CLEARLY!!! I can see the dead monkey going to the UK with the British passport. I can see it poking some bloody tosser. I can see the dead monkey in America, urinating on the recent health care bill and poking Brett Favre in the red zone.
"In Riyadh, in Riyadh your passports are" This is what we are told constantly for over a month. The dead monkey has made a home in Jordan. This time his bony fingers are holding their forked tongues. So many lies, hmm maybe it�s the southern bone that the dead monkey is putting on their tongues. The dead monkey is quite global. It has even been with that Nigerian idiot and poking airplane mechanics working in Lebanon.
LET�S GO DOCTOR! Let us eat and become great friends! YES! YES! Welcome to Najran!
, but if you marry any Saudi girl, I will KILL YOU!
Welcome people, welcome to Najran, Saudi Arabia.. WELCOME TO MY HYBRID HELL!
Stay tuned for part two



and someone hijacked the thread into an insatiable vortex of self gratification. please don't do this we want more dead monkey not some off topic off thread conversation whirling out of control. with all due respects to both sides shall we put it in the past and poke on?

Grendal
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ThaneKerner



Joined: 13 Sep 2009
Posts: 139

PostPosted: Sun Jan 31, 2010 11:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I nearly went to Saudi myself. I'm so damn glad I didn't. I was warned off Saudi, and I listened.

I wouldn't teach in Saudi now for less than 6 THOUSAND USD a month. And that's for 20 hours teaching a week.
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johnslat



Joined: 21 Jan 2003
Posts: 13859
Location: Santa Fe, New Mexico, USA

PostPosted: Sun Jan 31, 2010 4:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dear Grendal,

" . . . we want more dead monkey . . ."

Is that the "royal we?" And "hijacking" (something you've never done, I'm sure) is actually irrelevant. Only "Demigod" can provide more "Dead Monkey."

Regards,
John
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veiledsentiments



Joined: 20 Feb 2003
Posts: 17644
Location: USA

PostPosted: Sun Jan 31, 2010 4:25 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It seems to me that Mr demigod merely throws up a new thread with each entry to his 'diary' and from there on it is up to us to carry on...

Of course... far be it for any of us here to hijack a thread... (cough... cough...)

VS
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Grendal



Joined: 13 Aug 2009
Posts: 861
Location: Lurking in the depths of the Faisaliah Tower underground parking.

PostPosted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 5:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

johnslat wrote:
Dear Grendal,

" . . . we want more dead monkey . . ."

Is that the "royal we?" And "hijacking" (something you've never done, I'm sure) is actually irrelevant. Only "Demigod" can provide more "Dead Monkey."

Regards,
John


Dear John,

Meow....... Very Happy
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Grendal



Joined: 13 Aug 2009
Posts: 861
Location: Lurking in the depths of the Faisaliah Tower underground parking.

PostPosted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 5:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dear John,

Sorry about that. I didn't mean to get your wiskers in a knot. I was just using some fancy-shmancy words of which I have no idea of their meaning.

I wanted to be smart like you

Grendal
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johnslat



Joined: 21 Jan 2003
Posts: 13859
Location: Santa Fe, New Mexico, USA

PostPosted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 3:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dear Grendal,

Good heavens - "Meow" doesn't upset me. My cat, Archer, says that to me all the time.
But as for this:

"I wanted to be smart like you."

As Archer will be glad to tell you, compared to cats, I'm dumber than dirt.
Almost as dumb as an - ugh - dog.

Of course, my dog, Tenzing Norgay, (Tenzie, for short) disputes that.

Regards,
John
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Sheikh N Bake



Joined: 26 Apr 2007
Posts: 1307
Location: Dis ting of ours

PostPosted: Wed Feb 03, 2010 7:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

veiledsentiments wrote:
It seems to me that Mr demigod merely throws up a new thread with each entry to his 'diary' and from there on it is up to us to carry on...

Of course... far be it for any of us here to hijack a thread... (cough... cough...)

VS


VS! I never hijack threads.

Sopranos quote of the day:

Dr. Melfi: "Have you ever had a prostate exam?"
Tony Soprano: "Are you kidding? I don't let anyone wag their finger in my face."

Now about that sudden-black ending of the series, what do yo
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dnaleslie



Joined: 29 May 2009
Posts: 6
Location: Providence, Rhode Island

PostPosted: Mon Mar 15, 2010 3:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

So......
Anybody able to separate Najran fact from fiction??
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scot47



Joined: 10 Jan 2003
Posts: 15343

PostPosted: Mon Mar 15, 2010 10:13 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It is a hellhole.
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dnaleslie



Joined: 29 May 2009
Posts: 6
Location: Providence, Rhode Island

PostPosted: Mon Mar 15, 2010 5:05 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks for the sincerity. But anybody around with a more thoughtful, holistic picture?
Many thanks.
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Never Ceased To Be Amazed



Joined: 22 Oct 2004
Posts: 3500
Location: Shhh...don't talk to me...I'm playin' dead...

PostPosted: Mon Mar 15, 2010 5:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

scot47 wrote:
It is a hellhole.


I wuz sayin' that to prospects over a year ago, but John rebuked me with some real flowery wording about the place. At least he'd been there and I hadn't...only had word from an exiled saudi troop who'd been sentenced to the place.

Tsk, tsk, John, I say, Tsk tsk... Very Happy

NCTBA
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johnslat



Joined: 21 Jan 2003
Posts: 13859
Location: Santa Fe, New Mexico, USA

PostPosted: Mon Mar 15, 2010 5:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dear NCTBA,

So you're saying you give more credence to scot47's "hellhole" than to my "flowery wording?"

How much time has scot47 spent in Najran? Plus, my opinion and scot47's are both subjective, of course.

"The mind is its own place, and in itself, can make heaven of Hell, and a hell of Heaven."

(not that I'd call Najran a "heavenhole," either.)

Tsk, tsk, yourself, amigo.

Regards,
John Smile
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