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Amarok
Joined: 02 Jun 2009
Posts: 47
Location: pineapple under the sea
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 Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 9:40 am Post subject: |
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| yangyoseop wrote: |
| projectrook wrote: |
This has nothing to do with your sexual preferences, but it does your maturity and choice not to grow up. If you want an adult job, then be an adult. If you want to play dress up and do whatever you want, Im sure fast food restaurants will gladly accept your application. |
...are you serious? Expressing one's sexuality and gender identity has nothing to do with growing up. JFC, I cannot even begin to comprehend the fact that someone has such an ignorant way of thinking.
Seriously, what??? I'm dumbfounded. |
I'm dumbfounded that you think wearing makeup is a necessary "expressing one's sexuality and gender identity." Projectrook has the right of it, although the fast food comment's a little harsh. If you're going to be a teacher and in a professional environment where you're watched closely, you need to adhere to what's expected of you. In an ideal world it wouldn't matter what people do or what they look like, but in reality it can't be happy PC time for everybody. It's Japan.
You can be gay without wearing makeup or women's clothing. Nobody is telling him he has to pretend he's straight or go against who he is--they're just saying that he needs to not wear makeup and be overwhelmingly flamboyant in public if he doesn't want that to affect his job or standing in the community. And nobody's saying that he needs to quit this entirely if it's what he's into--just saying that people in Japan WILL judge him for it, and he needs to understand that it's his own doing if he gets into trouble for it. It's common sense when it comes to Japanese conformity. |
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Cool Teacher
Joined: 18 May 2009
Posts: 930
Location: Here, There and Everywhere! :D
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| Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 5:22 pm Post subject: |
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Hay! Where's the OP?  |
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yangyoseop
Joined: 30 Mar 2010
Posts: 47
Location: #1 Sandra Bullock fan in Tallahassee, FL
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| Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 6:12 pm Post subject: |
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| Amarok wrote: |
| yangyoseop wrote: |
| projectrook wrote: |
This has nothing to do with your sexual preferences, but it does your maturity and choice not to grow up. If you want an adult job, then be an adult. If you want to play dress up and do whatever you want, Im sure fast food restaurants will gladly accept your application. |
...are you serious? Expressing one's sexuality and gender identity has nothing to do with growing up. JFC, I cannot even begin to comprehend the fact that someone has such an ignorant way of thinking.
Seriously, what??? I'm dumbfounded. |
I'm dumbfounded that you think wearing makeup is a necessary "expressing one's sexuality and gender identity." Projectrook has the right of it, although the fast food comment's a little harsh. If you're going to be a teacher and in a professional environment where you're watched closely, you need to adhere to what's expected of you. In an ideal world it wouldn't matter what people do or what they look like, but in reality it can't be happy PC time for everybody. It's Japan.
You can be gay without wearing makeup or women's clothing. Nobody is telling him he has to pretend he's straight or go against who he is--they're just saying that he needs to not wear makeup and be overwhelmingly flamboyant in public if he doesn't want that to affect his job or standing in the community. And nobody's saying that he needs to quit this entirely if it's what he's into--just saying that people in Japan WILL judge him for it, and he needs to understand that it's his own doing if he gets into trouble for it. It's common sense when it comes to Japanese conformity. |
Expressing one's self through clothing and makeup certainly does play a role in expressing gender identity. And OP said he's q u e e r, we're assuming, which is not the same thing as gay, so yes, there is some element of gender identity going on.
Nobody's arguing that this sort of thing isn't going to be accepted in the workplace in Asia. That's a given. The problem I have is that people aren't making it about the workplace, especially projectrook. He's just straight up dismissing that sort of expression of self as something silly, unnecessary and immature, when in fact it's something that should be respected and regarded as an essential part to OP (or whoever's) sexual/gender identity. Honestly, it was a transphobic statement if I ever heard one. |
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Imseriouslylost
Joined: 09 Nov 2009
Posts: 123
Location: Tokyo
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| Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 9:43 pm Post subject: |
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| Amarok wrote: |
| Someone told you that Japan ISN'T homophobic? HAH! |
Japan is the least homophobic country in Asia... that's not saying very much. |
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yangyoseop
Joined: 30 Mar 2010
Posts: 47
Location: #1 Sandra Bullock fan in Tallahassee, FL
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| Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 9:56 pm Post subject: |
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| Imseriouslylost wrote: |
| Amarok wrote: |
| Someone told you that Japan ISN'T homophobic? HAH! |
Japan is the least homophobic country in Asia... that's not saying very much. |
Thailand.
Last edited by yangyoseop on Tue Apr 27, 2010 1:23 am; edited 2 times in total |
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Imseriouslylost
Joined: 09 Nov 2009
Posts: 123
Location: Tokyo
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| Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 10:01 pm Post subject: |
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| yangyoseop wrote: |
| Imseriouslylost wrote: |
| Amarok wrote: |
| Someone told you that Japan ISN'T homophobic? HAH! |
Japan is the least homophobic country in Asia... that's not saying very much. |
Thailand. |
East Asia then! |
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Petitioner
Joined: 08 Apr 2010
Posts: 3
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| Posted: Sun May 02, 2010 9:15 pm Post subject: OP here. |
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Wow, I appreciate everyone's input.
I guess most people misunderstand transgendered versus gay, etc, etc. Fine, I have no reason to take offense by this. If you think it all boils down to dress up then, I can truthfully forgive your ignorance. I don't really care.
But even if I wear James bond's own suit, which I'd be happy to put on for any employer, I seem to just come across femme to people. Will anyone care about this? If someone "suspects I'm gay" is this going to screw me?
Also in my previous situation I ran into a problem that you'd almost never run into (outside the backwoods) in a Western country, I was nearly run out on a rail for things worn well outside of school during non-school hours. It was kind of a freak thing to even have people spot me on my way to catch a cab into town to bowl with my friends.
One thing I think is if I stuck to a really big city, probably anywhere in Asia, I wouldn't have the situation again. I'm considering Taiwan again but just sticking to smack in the middle of Taipei and taking a train to work. In my small town even bringing a boy up to my apartment was room for a lot of talky talk and everyone seemed to know each other,and I was one of only 18 foreigners in town, etc, etc.
I do appreciate the fact that I probably won't get any attempted violence in Japan. That's a nice thought to have. |
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Apsara
Joined: 20 Sep 2005
Posts: 2142
Location: Tokyo, Japan
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| Posted: Sun May 02, 2010 11:01 pm Post subject: Re: OP here. |
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| Petitioner wrote: |
Will anyone care about this? If someone "suspects I'm gay" is this going to screw me?
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Just like in a lot of other countries, this is going to depend completely on the openmindedness of the employer, so case by case. I know a few gay guys here in Tokyo (working in finance as well as eikaiwa) who have never hidden their sexuality from their coworkers, and they have been with their companies for years. They aren't camp at all but it's not hard to guess they're gay either.
I completely agree that you should stick to the big cities. If you live in Tokyo, Yokohama, Osaka etc your chances of running into your coworkers/students on your days off are quiet small (provided you don't live and work near the same suburban station), and I really think people are more openminded in the big cities- head to Shibuya or Harajuku and you will be very far from the weirdest person there, believe me. |
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