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rxk22
Joined: 19 May 2010
Posts: 1629
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 Posted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 1:09 pm Post subject: Re: Anybody still use Ms? |
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| baki wrote: |
The JT is absolutely right. How would you address someone older than you at a job interview and you weren't sure if they were using a married name or not? "Ms" is used especially on a professional level because it's just as neutral as using "Mr", unless they would like to be addressed otherwise.
How is "Ms." pronounced? -> Mirz  |
I'd just use Mrs. Never had a problem with that. For true. |
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rxk22
Joined: 19 May 2010
Posts: 1629
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| Posted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 1:13 pm Post subject: |
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| seklarwia wrote: |
| rxk22 wrote: |
| Guess it's just you and me=D Ouside of company letter head and that one lady I've never actually heard it in real life. |
I can only speak from a UK perspective where Miss is used more than Ms. For example, just reading the news:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/crime/8216219/Crossbow-cannibal-victims-three-likeable-women-who-fell-for-Stephen-Griffiths-lies.html
The three victims are 31, 36 and 43, so most certainly women and not young girls and yet after their first mention when their full names are given, they are each then referred to as Miss.
Even in a business setting I go by Miss as do my head programmer who has 10 years on me and the managers of two of our EU branches (both considerably older). The women in the company who are married use Mrs... I guess they are proud of their marritial status and want to let others know of it. And I've never had to worry about getting titles wrong since my PA is very good at her job and will find out everything from titles to food allergies, strong dislikes and things to avoid for the big clients. |
Hmm, wonder if it's really ingrained in UK culture then? Perhaps in the US and other places, Miss is more for a young woman, while in the UK it is for unmarried women in general? |
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-E-
Joined: 16 Dec 2010
Posts: 6
Location: StL, MO USA
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| Posted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 9:54 pm Post subject: Re: Anybody still use Ms? |
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| rxk22 wrote: |
| baki wrote: |
The JT is absolutely right. How would you address someone older than you at a job interview and you weren't sure if they were using a married name or not? "Ms" is used especially on a professional level because it's just as neutral as using "Mr", unless they would like to be addressed otherwise.
How is "Ms." pronounced? -> Mirz |
I'd just use Mrs. Never had a problem with that. For true. |
Ooooh, that'd get you in trouble with some people I know. You know, most people wouldn't say anything to you about it, since it would seem kinda "b***y". But it would be mentally recorded as a strike against you, especially if they weren't wearing a ring.
I'd bet that a lot of people wouldn't even notice, though, if it were just said out loud in passing; the pronouciations are so close. In writing, though, it might get noticed. |
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Apsara
Joined: 20 Sep 2005
Posts: 2142
Location: Tokyo, Japan
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| Posted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 11:42 pm Post subject: Re: Anybody still use Ms? |
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| rxk22 wrote: |
| baki wrote: |
The JT is absolutely right. How would you address someone older than you at a job interview and you weren't sure if they were using a married name or not? "Ms" is used especially on a professional level because it's just as neutral as using "Mr", unless they would like to be addressed otherwise.
How is "Ms." pronounced? -> Mirz |
I'd just use Mrs. Never had a problem with that. For true. |
While I might not have said anything to the person about it, before I got married I would have found it really weird to be called Mrs. Family Name by anyone in a professional situation and I think a lot of women would feel similarly, so I wouldn't really recommend this. To tell you the truth even after several years of marriage I am not used to being called "Mrs." and prefer Ms., although there aren't actually a lot of times I am addressed like that, since in Japan it's -san of course and in New Zealand everybody uses first names for pretty much every situation.
At my office job I write a lot of business emails and more than 50% of the time it is to women- I always use Ms. unless I know for sure that the person is married, and even then I often fall back on Ms.- it's the most neutral and it just makes sense to use it rather than Miss or Ms. |
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rxk22
Joined: 19 May 2010
Posts: 1629
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| Posted: Fri Feb 11, 2011 2:23 am Post subject: Re: Anybody still use Ms? |
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| -E- wrote: |
| rxk22 wrote: |
| baki wrote: |
The JT is absolutely right. How would you address someone older than you at a job interview and you weren't sure if they were using a married name or not? "Ms" is used especially on a professional level because it's just as neutral as using "Mr", unless they would like to be addressed otherwise.
How is "Ms." pronounced? -> Mirz |
I'd just use Mrs. Never had a problem with that. For true. |
Ooooh, that'd get you in trouble with some people I know. You know, most people wouldn't say anything to you about it, since it would seem kinda "b***y". But it would be mentally recorded as a strike against you, especially if they weren't wearing a ring.
I'd bet that a lot of people wouldn't even notice, though, if it were just said out loud in passing; the pronouciations are so close. In writing, though, it might get noticed. |
Yeah I don't get why people care so much about it. If women really wanted an extra was to say Mrs without marriage being brought up, hey would of though of a better word, Miss and Ms are so close, it's confusing.
To me, if the lady is 30ish, I call em Mrs, and if they are young Miss. I don't care about the marriage part much at all. Not sure why people get caught up in it, seems kinda hysterical to me. |
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rxk22
Joined: 19 May 2010
Posts: 1629
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| Posted: Fri Feb 11, 2011 2:29 am Post subject: Re: Anybody still use Ms? |
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| Apsara wrote: |
| rxk22 wrote: |
| baki wrote: |
The JT is absolutely right. How would you address someone older than you at a job interview and you weren't sure if they were using a married name or not? "Ms" is used especially on a professional level because it's just as neutral as using "Mr", unless they would like to be addressed otherwise.
How is "Ms." pronounced? -> Mirz |
I'd just use Mrs. Never had a problem with that. For true. |
While I might not have said anything to the person about it, before I got married I would have found it really weird to be called Mrs. Family Name by anyone in a professional situation and I think a lot of women would feel similarly, so I wouldn't really recommend this. To tell you the truth even after several years of marriage I am not used to being called "Mrs." and prefer Ms., although there aren't actually a lot of times I am addressed like that, since in Japan it's -san of course and in New Zealand everybody uses first names for pretty much every situation.
At my office job I write a lot of business emails and more than 50% of the time it is to women- I always use Ms. unless I know for sure that the person is married, and even then I often fall back on Ms.- it's the most neutral and it just makes sense to use it rather than Miss or Ms. |
What you say is reasonable, but I disagree. I think people make way too big a deal about it. Honestly if you don't like being called, go by your first name. All that other stuff is confusing and annoying to be honest. It's very similar and most people get it wrong anywho. |
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Apsara
Joined: 20 Sep 2005
Posts: 2142
Location: Tokyo, Japan
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| Posted: Fri Feb 11, 2011 6:14 am Post subject: |
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Can I ask if you are male or female? There is nothing hysterical about women preferring an accurate title. It's just plain wrong to address an unmarried woman as Mrs., and that's all there is to it really. I personally have no trouble distinguishing Ms. and Miss when I hear them, and it's not very hard to check with the person concerned whether they have a preference.
If you are female and don't care what you are referred to as, then that's fine in your case, but perhaps other women do have a preference. If you are male, it wouldn't do you any harm to give the women you deal with in more formal situations the respect of addressing them with an accurate title, and not think of them as "hysterical" if they happen to have a preference. The point I have been trying to make is that if you use Ms., you are never wrong- that's pretty much the whole reason the title was invented in the first place. |
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kimsmith
Joined: 21 Feb 2009
Posts: 14
Location: Brighton
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| Posted: Fri Feb 11, 2011 7:12 am Post subject: |
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| I'm British and married, but I go by Ms. if required to fill in a form or choose an option on a form. As others have said, Miss is too young, and I haven't taken my husband's family name so Mrs. doesn't feel right either. |
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Cool Teacher
Joined: 18 May 2009
Posts: 930
Location: Here, There and Everywhere! :D
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| Posted: Fri Feb 11, 2011 10:09 am Post subject: |
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As a man I want to say:
I use "Ms" because if I use "Mrs" or "Miss" I think it could be sexist. 
Think about this situation. If I ask a lady's name and she says "Jane Smith" should I be able to say, "Ohhhh, Mrs Smith? Miss Smith?" because if I do it looks like I am trying to find out if she is married or "available". 
It's well sexist that a woman has to introduce herself by way of revealing her marital status.  |
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rxk22
Joined: 19 May 2010
Posts: 1629
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| Posted: Fri Feb 11, 2011 3:09 pm Post subject: |
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| Apsara wrote: |
Can I ask if you are male or female? There is nothing hysterical about women preferring an accurate title. It's just plain wrong to address an unmarried woman as Mrs., and that's all there is to it really. I personally have no trouble distinguishing Ms. and Miss when I hear them, and it's not very hard to check with the person concerned whether they have a preference.
If you are female and don't care what you are referred to as, then that's fine in your case, but perhaps other women do have a preference. If you are male, it wouldn't do you any harm to give the women you deal with in more formal situations the respect of addressing them with an accurate title, and not think of them as "hysterical" if they happen to have a preference. The point I have been trying to make is that if you use Ms., you are never wrong- that's pretty much the whole reason the title was invented in the first place. |
Def male.
Sorry for using hysterical. I just don't see it as a big deal. |
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smeeky
Joined: 12 Jan 2011
Posts: 2
Location: Hitachi-shi, Japan
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| Posted: Mon Jun 27, 2011 5:34 pm Post subject: |
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| Here in Australia, Miss in generally only used when addressing young girls up to 18 or so, then professionally it is only seen when the title-holder wants, for whatever reason, the world to know her marital status. Ms. was introduced so that women could have a title equivalent to Mr by which men can be addressed without marital status being an issue, to prevent sexual discrimination. |
In Ireland this is exactly the same.
This is an old post and I'm sorry for bumping but I thought it was interesting that there's such a significance put on that title in some countries.... I was addressed as Miss as a kid on letters etc. but since age 16, I've used Ms. Noone uses Miss anymore, it's outdated where I come from. Nowadays, it would be considered a bit weird for someone to choose Miss once reaching adulthood, but the option is always there on forms, applications etc. If you're over a certain age, using "Miss" as a form of address is considered to be old maid, spinsterish, but gentille in a way in Ireland.
Of course, they're pronounced pretty much the same...
I'm in my 20s still btw 
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ssjup81
Joined: 15 Jun 2009
Posts: 664
Location: Adachi-ku, Tokyo, Japan
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| Posted: Mon Jun 27, 2011 5:37 pm Post subject: |
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I don't mind being referred to as "Ms.", but I like being addressed as "Miss". It is outdated here in the US, but I always liked how it looked with my name.  |
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whispechoes
Joined: 07 Feb 2010
Posts: 20
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| Posted: Tue Jun 28, 2011 3:51 am Post subject: |
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| rxk22 wrote: |
Def male.
Sorry for using hysterical. I just don't see it as a big deal. |
Mm, well since you've never been subjected to it, try to imagine this:
Pretend that every time someone tried to refer to you politely, they would say "Mr. Married [name]." Then, if you corrected them, they would say, "Oh, sorry, Mr. Single [name]... anyway, Mr. Single [name], blah blah blah.."
It's not a big deal, sure, and maybe you wouldn't mind being referred to by your marital status. But to someone who gets hit with those assumptions every time someone is just trying to be polite, it kind of wears on you after a while. |
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gittelbug
Joined: 08 Feb 2010
Posts: 43
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| Posted: Tue Jun 28, 2011 12:15 pm Post subject: |
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Basically what everyone else said.
In writing:
Miss- Children. elementary school age until high school at the latest.
Ms- starting in the late teens..Someone who may or may not be married.
Mrs- married or older (grandmother type) woman unless she says otherwise
In speaking:
Miss (same as Ms): Children and Woman who may or may not be married
Mrs: Same as in writing.
Mizz: Same as Miss/Ms
*grew up in the DC area when to University in Arizona.
I've always gone by what I recall a teacher of mine saying:
Miss: Unmarried
Mrs: Married
Ms: None of your business |
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