Job Discussion Forums

[mick_luna]

Hi, my name is Henry and i'm very lonely, i need to find love. Can someone help me please?

[therock]

Forget China then, you will be laughed at and the only females that will be interested in you are the ones who want to look cool, want a passport or practice their English. Its very difficult to meet Chinese women (Well sincere ones at least) If you are coming looking for love, then you are going to be a very lonely man.

[saint57]

I give this thread a 0% chance of surviving the week. It should be interesting while it lasts.

[therock]

Why don't you post this question on the China forum? You would get more responses there.

[mlomker]

[Tue]

No offense Mick, if you had trouble in Vietnam, your going to have trouble in China. They are fairly similar in a lot of ways.

I find Vietnam a great dating scene, better than China for me...once you stop looking for the quick one night romps, it is actually quite good for dating.

By you single minded posts, it seems your goals are quite transparent and the girls are going to see right through you where ever you go.

[mick_luna]

Well, this original post was tongue and cheek, as Mlonker pointed out. My name isn't Henry, that is the alias of a complete w*****.

However, i'd be interested to hear where you are in vietnam and why you find it better than china. i'd also be interested to hear your comment about 'girls seeing right through you.' Is looking for love some kind of crime? it does often seem to be painted that way in certain cultures, although i've never heard it expressed the way you did. and i'm not expressing just my own views on vietnam, i heard it said by many there and many in other countries with experience of Vietnamese culture. You can look it up in Lonely Planet if you like. if you live there, i'm sure you won't have a hard time finding expats who aren't exactly enthralled with the dating scene.

also, i'm talking about white guys dating vietnamese girls. you don't say what race you are, and i'm not saying that it isn't done, i certainly saw some successful blokes, i just don't think its the best place for the average single white guy to go if he doesn't want a serious case of blue balls.

My editor at the vietnam investment review had an affair with a vietnamese girl, but she wouldn't be seen out of the house with him, for fear of being labeled a prostitute. and here in toronto, one of my friends had a female vietnamese student who was in love with a black guy, but the vietnamese male students in the class soon put a stop to that. Vietnam is certainly one of the more jingoistic and xenophobic countries in the world, certainly the most so of the countries i've experienced.

i'm hearing quite different things from friends and posters who've experienced China. maybe they are/were in better cities than you were, or maybe you have found a better fit in Vietnam due to personal reasons, i don't know. obviously there are a lot of variables involved, but i don't think Vietnam is going to be called the Brazil of the East any time soon

also, it appears that China is really opening up to Western culture, and many Chinese girls find themselves disenchanted with the generation of spoiled boys that has been raised since the one child policy was implemented. Vietnamese girls still tend to be more traditional than many Chinese girls, just as China is racing ahead of Vietnam in cultural and technological innovation. That has a lot to do with size, history and geography, and many factors too complex to go into here. Vietnam has certainly had an unfortunate history of foreign invasions, and that has helped shape its culture. China doesn't have that same level of insecurity, for obvious reasons.

[Porlestone]

[Tue]

hey,

I agree with what you are saying, but I must argue some points.

Like China, there is a younger group of women here who are not as traditional as they would like you to believe. But I have notice that it does take time and trust to break that barrier. I have only been here 2 months but I have been doing quite well, and just this week I was approached by a stunner in the netcafe. 25 and not-happily married, it has been quite interesting. Granted she doesn't and won't show affection outside (she is married after all) but she is really enjoying the active sex life, and she has told me many women feel this way...married young according to tradition and then lonely and frustrated by 25. I just think that the Vietnamese are no where as open about it as the Chinese.

Also being outside a major city in China and the chances plummet also.

Yes many Vietnamese are xenophobic, but many women realize that dating/marriage with a foreigner can often lead to a better life and more opportunities... I found this also similar in China..and yes this does piss off some of the locals...but hey the joys of living abroad!

Many of the guys here feel the same way, that its hopeless, but it is truly not. I am not saying this is Japan or Thailand, but once you stop looking for the quick fix, things will happen unexpectedly. Trust me ,I thought I was is for a date with the palm-sisters for a long time, but I have done quite well since I have been here.

Guys this is just my two sense, but there are quite a few parallels between China and Vietnam culture wise, granted Vietnam is behind China in many of the traditions and westernization, but in my opinion, I much prefer living and work here.

Cheers and good hunting.

[saint57]

It is amazing that this thread is seeing some action.

[Jared]

[mick_luna]

wow, Jared, thanks for that inciteful and entirely obtuse comment. Apparently you missed the irony of this thread entirely (My name isn't 'Henry' by the way.) It takes some talent to miss the point so completely.

I love that about all girls being the same everywhere. Apparently you've learned a lot about culture. Have you ever been outside of your own country? If you really think all girls are the same, i suggest you hit the singles scene in Saudi Arabia and see what happens. We'll look for you in the papers.

[mick_luna]

and any more 'buddy' this, or 'dear mick' that from you and Mr. Misanthrope, aka Henry Cowell, and i'll have to get medieval. i'm not your 'buddy', Jared, i suggest you go find yourself one.

[saint57]

[Jared]