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Maitoshi
Joined: 04 May 2014
Posts: 718
Location: 何処でも
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 Posted: Thu Sep 25, 2014 12:53 am Post subject: |
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Another thought along the same lines, a 4-8 week relationship with a J-lady might have its benefits, as well  |
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horned
Joined: 29 Jun 2014
Posts: 8
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| Posted: Thu Sep 25, 2014 5:41 am Post subject: |
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| Maitoshi wrote: |
I'd like to echo what many have already stated about everyone being different regarding adaptability, et cetera. Yes, there are all types, but people also change.
I'd like to add that if you do choose a J-lady as a life partner, that both parties ought to be willing to try living in the others' country long-term, at least initially. You may find that your feelings, or hers, change dramatically as more of life happens, and one of you may need to make some serious compromises if you value the relationship. |
And I'd like to add that when hooking up with any human in the real world spend less time on gaijin boards where people have really narrow/fixed/limited/distorted/outdated views based on their own failure to learn the local language, participate in and integrate into the local community...
... and spend more time with said human, learning to be human, practicing the ever value diminishing art of communication.
Works wonders for "cross-cultural" relationships as well as relationships based on cultural chauvanism, colonialism, Asian fetish, YBF... in fact it can even turn the latter into a real one! |
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Maitoshi
Joined: 04 May 2014
Posts: 718
Location: 何処でも
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| Posted: Thu Sep 25, 2014 8:24 am Post subject: |
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"spend more time with said human, learning to be human, practicing the ever value diminishing art of communication.
Works wonders for "cross-cultural" relationships as well as relationships based on cultural chauvanism, colonialism, Asian fetish, YBF... in fact it can even turn the latter into a real one!"
THIS!!! |
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The Fifth Column
Joined: 11 Jun 2014
Posts: 331
Location: His habitude with lexical items protrudes not unlike a damaged pollex!!!
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| Posted: Thu Sep 25, 2014 10:33 am Post subject: |
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Turning a deaf ear to yammering also aids "cross-cultural" relationships...   |
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natsume
Joined: 24 Apr 2006
Posts: 409
Location: Chongqing, China
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| Posted: Thu Sep 25, 2014 1:37 pm Post subject: |
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| Well, not marrying somebody you don't know very well or even understand is good advice. So, yes, don't marry a Japanese woman if you have no concept of where she is coming from culturally, or really what she is actually like as a person. |
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The Fifth Column
Joined: 11 Jun 2014
Posts: 331
Location: His habitude with lexical items protrudes not unlike a damaged pollex!!!
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| Posted: Thu Sep 25, 2014 1:54 pm Post subject: |
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| natsume wrote: |
| Well, not marrying somebody you don't know very well or even understand is good advice. So, yes, don't marry a Japanese woman if you have no concept of where she is coming from culturally, or really what she is actually like as a person. |
Good advice. It DOES work out sometimes, though. I asked my wife to marry me on our 2nd date three days after the 1st. We had a ROUGH year or two, but we eventually got to know each other and make allowances. Been together for more than twenty years now.
Had we attempted it in our early 20's, it probably wouldn't have survived. |
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rxk22
Joined: 19 May 2010
Posts: 1629
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| Posted: Thu Sep 25, 2014 10:22 pm Post subject: |
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| natsume wrote: |
| Well, not marrying somebody you don't know very well or even understand is good advice. So, yes, don't marry a Japanese woman if you have no concept of where she is coming from culturally, or really what she is actually like as a person. |
I am married , and it has worked out great. Thing is, it seems to not to, all too often. Abroad, it seems that the Japanese are really bad at adapting to a different culture. I saw this all too often. Many Japanese women were living in their Japan-bubble, and made sure that they never even tried to integrate. Much like many of the gaijon here.
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Shimokitazawa
Joined: 16 Aug 2009
Posts: 458
Location: Saigon, Vietnam
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| Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2014 2:18 am Post subject: |
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| rxk22 wrote: |
| They are prolly the worst at adapting when outside of their country. |
"Prolly"?
Come on, man. This is an English teaching forum and you're communicating like a sub-literate.
And you're an English instructor? |
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Shimokitazawa
Joined: 16 Aug 2009
Posts: 458
Location: Saigon, Vietnam
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| Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2014 2:21 am Post subject: Re: Is japan worth a try? |
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| airport5 wrote: |
| I'm making my way through the forums....Is it worth it to try teaching in japan? I've taught in 4 other countries in Asia. |
No, Japan is definitely not 'worth a try.'
Forget it. Unless you'd like to punish yourself, the industry is all but dead here.
Japan has the worst EFL contracts in Asia, now. You're better off heading to Korea or China. |
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rxk22
Joined: 19 May 2010
Posts: 1629
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| Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2014 2:48 am Post subject: |
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| Shimokitazawa wrote: |
| rxk22 wrote: |
| They are prolly the worst at adapting when outside of their country. |
"Prolly"?
Come on, man. This is an English teaching forum and you're communicating like a sub-literate.
And you're an English instructor? |
I'm sorry, I didn't realize I had to meet your expectations. Please forgive this unworthy mortal! |
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Maitoshi
Joined: 04 May 2014
Posts: 718
Location: 何処でも
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| Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2014 3:46 am Post subject: Re: Is japan worth a try? |
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| Shimokitazawa wrote: |
| airport5 wrote: |
| I'm making my way through the forums....Is it worth it to try teaching in japan? I've taught in 4 other countries in Asia. |
No, Japan is definitely not 'worth a try.'
Forget it. Unless you'd like to punish yourself, the industry is all but dead here.
Japan has the worst EFL contracts in Asia, now. You're better off heading to Korea or China. |
Maybe OP already did Korea and China. I your sentiments on the contracts, though. |
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nightsintodreams
Joined: 18 May 2010
Posts: 558
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| Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2014 4:15 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: |
Shimokitazawa wrote:
airport5 wrote:
I'm making my way through the forums....Is it worth it to try teaching in japan? I've taught in 4 other countries in Asia.
No, Japan is definitely not 'worth a try.'
Forget it. Unless you'd like to punish yourself, the industry is all but dead here.
Japan has the worst EFL contracts in Asia, now. You're better off heading to Korea or China.
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It doesn't sound to me like the OP is looking for a high wage. Not everyone is in TEFL for a large pay check.
With teaching experience the OP should be able to easily aquire a job with a monthly salary of at least 250,000 yen. After a few months he could also pick up a private lesson or two without too much hassle bringing his salary up to 270,000-300,000.
Even thew original 250,000 is more than enough to live, travel and drink in Japan, especially while in your first year as you pay practically zero health and taxes. |
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Shimokitazawa
Joined: 16 Aug 2009
Posts: 458
Location: Saigon, Vietnam
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| Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2014 11:14 pm Post subject: |
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| nightsintodreams wrote: |
| Even thew original 250,000 is more than enough to live, travel and drink in Japan, especially while in your first year as you pay practically zero health and taxes. |
The last part of this makes a good point because in Taiwan, for example, teachers must pay up to 40% income tax the first year they are working and living in Taiwan. Later, in the following tax year, they can apply to the government to have a significant amount of those tax deductions returned to them.
Still, it's a terrible system and absolutely Japan is a better destination for the short-term TEFL'er than Taiwan from this perspective.
That said, from a long-term perspective, the TEFL industry in Japan is on life support. You have to go where the work is, and it's not in Japan. |
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