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trapezius
Joined: 13 Aug 2006
Posts: 1670
Location: Land of Culture of Death & Destruction
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 Posted: Sat Jan 04, 2014 8:20 pm Post subject: |
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| simply because they have got everything right themselves. People simply enjoy giving themselves credit. |
Not always the case. Many times people who have been burned by their prior decisions/actions are the ones who happily dole out advice to prevent others from falling into the same traps. |
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johnslat
Joined: 21 Jan 2003
Posts: 13859
Location: Santa Fe, New Mexico, USA
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| Posted: Sat Jan 04, 2014 8:23 pm Post subject: |
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Dear rollingk,
"As you have said, we need to "synthesize" what comes our way: take what is usable and throw the other crap in the heap."
Good advice. 
But a problem may be in the individual's ability to decide what is "useful"
and what is "crap."
Regards,
John |
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rollingk
Joined: 23 Jul 2006
Posts: 212
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| Posted: Sat Jan 04, 2014 10:27 pm Post subject: |
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Quote:
simply because they have got everything right themselves. People simply enjoy giving themselves credit.
Not always the case. Many times people who have been burned by their prior decisions/actions are the ones who happily dole out advice to prevent others from falling into the same traps. |
Yes. Sorry, didn't mean to imply all advice givers were only self serving, although I may have sounded so. Thank god for those with real life stories to tell. |
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JoeKing
Joined: 30 Apr 2008
Posts: 519
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| Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 5:18 am Post subject: Re: People seeking advice and the possible incongruous outco |
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| lcanupp1964 wrote: |
Rather, they are only seeking positive affirmations to reinforce their “gut” decision on taking the position. In other words, they are just seeking approval and are not interested in listening to the advice of the other posters.
Maybe it’s human nature to ignore advice if it goes against your “gut” . Maybe this instinct becomes stronger when soliciting the advice of strangers.  |
I don't think it is always their "gut" they want affirmation for. In fact, their "gut" may be odds with what they "want" to happen, so they seek assurances that if they go against their "gut" everything will still turn out all right! And yes, it is human nature. I wish I could say I was never guilty of it, but alas.......
Along the same lines, sometimes people will ask for help making a decision after describing a situation which should be clear to anyone has only one solution. "Uh, I just found out my alcoholic, abusive, and unemployed spouse has been stealing from me and has also been unfaithful to me in our own bed. Should I leave him/her?" |
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myohmy
Joined: 31 Jul 2013
Posts: 119
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| Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 10:15 am Post subject: |
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| grayskies wrote: |
Dear Ryanlogic,
Bullying also goes with the TEFLer position. It's a shame. I found your post right on the mark. Good luck with all your endeavours. |
Couldn't agree more. I find the original post in this thread to be, at best, mean-spirited. |
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spiral78
Joined: 05 Apr 2004
Posts: 11534
Location: On a Short Leash
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| Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 12:24 pm Post subject: |
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| find the original post in this thread to be, at best, mean-spirited |
So, it would be kinder and more caring to be less than realistic about people's actual chances and situations? Given that a little bad luck can go a very long way in a foreign country where one often hasn't got a strong support system, the kindest and most responsible thing we can do is to give very realistic advice to new posters. Whether they like what we have to say has little to do with it. |
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Sashadroogie
Joined: 17 Apr 2007
Posts: 11061
Location: Moskva, The Workers' Paradise
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| Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 1:41 pm Post subject: |
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| Now Spiral, you have a responsibility here, you know. |
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spiral78
Joined: 05 Apr 2004
Posts: 11534
Location: On a Short Leash
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| Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 5:53 pm Post subject: |
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Oh, of course. I had briefly forgotten that goal about validating everyone, regardless. Forgive!  |
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sicklyman
Joined: 02 Feb 2013
Posts: 930
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| Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 6:11 pm Post subject: |
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myohmy
Joined: 31 Jul 2013
Posts: 119
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| Posted: Mon Jan 06, 2014 5:14 pm Post subject: |
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| I don't see a shred of advice in this thread, but I do see bundles of condescension magnified by an echo chamber. |
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nomad soul
Joined: 31 Jan 2010
Posts: 11454
Location: The real world
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| Posted: Mon Jan 06, 2014 6:45 pm Post subject: |
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| myohmy wrote: |
| I don't see a shred of advice in this thread, but I do see bundles of condescension magnified by an echo chamber. |
Then why not post your own meaningful advice for newbies hoping to work in the region? And I'm not saying that to be flippant. |
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veiledsentiments
Joined: 20 Feb 2003
Posts: 17644
Location: USA
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| Posted: Tue Jan 07, 2014 1:21 am Post subject: |
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| myohmy wrote: |
| I don't see a shred of advice in this thread, but I do see bundles of condescension magnified by an echo chamber. |
It isn't meant to be a thread to give advice. It is a thread to make a bit of fun out of the frustration that the advice givers feel... and perhaps to make a few of the advice seekers to be more realistic.
VS |
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JoeKing
Joined: 30 Apr 2008
Posts: 519
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| Posted: Tue Jan 07, 2014 3:24 am Post subject: |
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| veiledsentiments wrote: |
| myohmy wrote: |
| I don't see a shred of advice in this thread, but I do see bundles of condescension magnified by an echo chamber. |
It isn't meant to be a thread to give advice. It is a thread to make a bit of fun out of the frustration that the advice givers feel... and perhaps to make a few of the advice seekers to be more realistic.
VS |
Well, not that I said anything that I need to apologize for, but my two cents were based solely on the opening post, because I find the topic of human nature and decision-making kind of interesting. In fact I just read a great book that I would highly recommend by Daniel Kahneman called Thinking, Fast and Slow.
The ensuing accusations and recriminations played no part in my comments. I rarely even venture into the Saudi Arabia forum, so don't know the players anyway. |
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meyanga
Joined: 02 Mar 2008
Posts: 103
Location: Malaysia
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| Posted: Wed Jan 08, 2014 2:32 pm Post subject: |
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hahahahahahahaha...it is years since I have been on the Saudi forum, or indeed, even on Dave's...was having a rubbish day and this thread made me laugh...a lot!
"I know my qualifications are minimal, but I should still be able to negotiate a salary of $4500 per month. Plus, I only want to live on a compound that has a large pool. Oh, and I only want well-behaved students too."
I seem to recall a big pool was a dream of mine a few years back too!
I came back seeking advice for my own situation and got some very inspiring and sensible replies - not what I wanted to hear as feeling neither inspired nor sensible right now! But people do give out advice with the best of intentions - it would be seriously mean to deliberately try to sabotage someone's life or career - someone that you don't even know. Let's have a bit more faith in the basic goodness of humanity than that.
Serious bit over....still laughing....
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Grendal
Joined: 13 Aug 2009
Posts: 861
Location: Lurking in the depths of the Faisaliah Tower underground parking.
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| Posted: Mon Feb 10, 2014 10:24 pm Post subject: |
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| scot47 wrote: |
| Experience will teach them. Personally I do not CARE if people listen to my sensible advice or not ! |
Here here. I agree with you Scot. I don't listen to your advice either.
Grendal |
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