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scot47
Joined: 10 Jan 2003
Posts: 15343
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 Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2015 12:03 pm Post subject: |
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If a trainee teacher came up with this remark about a student
" a douchebag with a stick up his **s"
I would suggest that he seek another career. |
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Nicky_McG
Joined: 24 Apr 2006
Posts: 190
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| Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2015 12:29 pm Post subject: |
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| scot47 wrote: |
If a trainee teacher came up with this remark about a student
" a douchebag with a stick up his **s"
I would suggest that he seek another career. |
Have you never been in a teacher's room? |
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Teacher in Rome
Joined: 09 Jul 2003
Posts: 1286
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| Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2015 12:35 pm Post subject: |
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If a trainee teacher came up with this remark about a student
" a douchebag with a stick up his **s"
I would suggest that he seek another career. |
What about an experienced teacher? I've had a couple of, shall we say, "challenging" students in my career who I've referred to in less than pleasant terms. But maybe I can get away with it because I've probably got more years' experience teaching than their age in years.
FWIW, I think that some of the earlier comments directed towards the OP were a little harsh. The student in question may well have been a PITA - and even more experienced teachers can find it hard to deal with situations like this. If you're new to teaching and not as self-confident as you might want to be, I can imagine that this sort of situation is quite stressful. So to the OP - definitely check out the ideas and resources that other posters have suggested. I don't have much to add - except to take a deep breath before allowing yourself to react negatively in a situation. Try and put yourself in the student's shoes - they're also likely to be a bit stressed (even a little fearful) if it's their first lesson.
Good luck for the future! |
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santi84
Joined: 14 Mar 2008
Posts: 1317
Location: under da sea
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| Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2015 1:16 pm Post subject: |
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| Nicky_McG wrote: |
| scot47 wrote: |
If a trainee teacher came up with this remark about a student
" a douchebag with a stick up his **s"
I would suggest that he seek another career. |
Have you never been in a teacher's room? |
I've heard this before in the lunch room at the K-4. It happens during frustration, for sure. Tact in handling abrasive students (and people in general) is a skill acquired over time. |
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spiral78
Joined: 05 Apr 2004
Posts: 11534
Location: On a Short Leash
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| Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2015 1:30 pm Post subject: |
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| I've heard this before in the lunch room at the K-4. It happens during frustration, for sure. |
I have heard this sort of thing and worse, but not for the 'crime' of requesting a lesson on idioms  |
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Nicky_McG
Joined: 24 Apr 2006
Posts: 190
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| Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2015 2:41 pm Post subject: |
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| spiral78 wrote: |
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| I've heard this before in the lunch room at the K-4. It happens during frustration, for sure. |
I have heard this sort of thing and worse, but not for the 'crime' of requesting a lesson on idioms |
Yet again you wilfully miscontrue the OP's point. |
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scot47
Joined: 10 Jan 2003
Posts: 15343
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| Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2015 3:58 pm Post subject: |
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I think the mixed metaphor made it worse. A douchebag does not have an anus.
Mixing of metaphors is a serious literary crime. |
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spiral78
Joined: 05 Apr 2004
Posts: 11534
Location: On a Short Leash
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| Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2015 5:55 pm Post subject: |
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PostPosted: Mon Aug 24, 2015 4:05 am Post subject: How difficult is it to teach English abroad? Reply with quote Report Post
I haven't run into this issue until today, but I had one student who had a real stick up his a$$ who couldn't even understand a normal question I asked him (like what rank is he in the military) demand that I teach him idioms like just out of the blue. It was my first time teaching this guy and within 5 minutes he was trying to tell me what to teach him when I asked him to tell me about his family. I was caught off guard by this and within 10 seconds, this guy ends our chat. I was thinking what a real douche bag. I've taught close to 40-50 students since I started this online teaching job like 2.5 weeks ago but it was my first time experiencing this.
This got me thinking, how difficult is it teach English abroad in a classroom? My understanding was that you teach them basic oral English, reading, and writing skills. Do your students ask you questions like teach me idioms or some random stuff like that? Also how often do your students challenge you and try to control the session and how do you handle those situations?
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Once again, back to the original post. I don't think it's misconstruing the OP to suggest that s/he was having a huge reaction to having a student request for lesson content (idioms) and having a student make an effort to control the lesson content in terms of not chatting about what the OP wanted to chat about.
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| Yet again you wilfully miscontrue the OP's point. |
I don't think so. Not misconstrued. |
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Nicky_McG
Joined: 24 Apr 2006
Posts: 190
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| Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2015 7:59 pm Post subject: |
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| spiral78 wrote: |
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PostPosted: Mon Aug 24, 2015 4:05 am Post subject: How difficult is it to teach English abroad? Reply with quote Report Post
I haven't run into this issue until today, but I had one student who had a real stick up his a$$ who couldn't even understand a normal question I asked him (like what rank is he in the military) demand that I teach him idioms like just out of the blue. It was my first time teaching this guy and within 5 minutes he was trying to tell me what to teach him when I asked him to tell me about his family. I was caught off guard by this and within 10 seconds, this guy ends our chat. I was thinking what a real douche bag. I've taught close to 40-50 students since I started this online teaching job like 2.5 weeks ago but it was my first time experiencing this.
This got me thinking, how difficult is it teach English abroad in a classroom? My understanding was that you teach them basic oral English, reading, and writing skills. Do your students ask you questions like teach me idioms or some random stuff like that? Also how often do your students challenge you and try to control the session and how do you handle those situations?
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Once again, back to the original post. I don't think it's misconstruing the OP to suggest that s/he was having a huge reaction to having a student request for lesson content (idioms) and having a student make an effort to control the lesson content in terms of not chatting about what the OP wanted to chat about.
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| Yet again you wilfully miscontrue the OP's point. |
I don't think so. Not misconstrued. |
The point obviously wasn't that the student asked to be taught idioms. It was that the student stopped the class and started ordering the OP to teach him certain things. No doubt he did it in an obnoxious way which is why the OP said what he said. If the student had asked if they could work on idioms the following week I'm sure there wouldn't have been a problem. |
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spiral78
Joined: 05 Apr 2004
Posts: 11534
Location: On a Short Leash
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| Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2015 8:05 pm Post subject: |
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Ditto if the OP had, as I suggested two pages ago, offered to prepare a next lesson on idioms. We don't have info on whether the student was rude in his request-only that the OP was nonplussed that a student would not follow the teacher's lead passively. I think the OP has received useful input here, including but not limited to that stuff you consider too harsh.
I myself would never ask a new student about personal stuff unrelated to English lessons like family details and military rank, and I can easily see how a new student might well prefer strongly to move on to a more neutral topic; in this case, idioms.
This is why nomad soul has pointed out that this particular 'job' isn't giving the OP much in the way of useful experience-they evidently suggest asking what many may consider personal questions. Scot was correct to point put that this can be unacceptable in some cultures.
Not harsh-useful. |
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santi84
Joined: 14 Mar 2008
Posts: 1317
Location: under da sea
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| Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2015 8:39 pm Post subject: |
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| Interesting how some of you mention that family is a taboo subject for Muslim students. I have found the opposite to be true, but I wonder if that is because I generally teach all female classes (and I am female myself). |
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nomad soul
Joined: 31 Jan 2010
Posts: 11454
Location: The real world
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| Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2015 10:31 pm Post subject: |
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| santi84 wrote: |
| Interesting how some of you mention that family is a taboo subject for Muslim students. I have found the opposite to be true, but I wonder if that is because I generally teach all female classes (and I am female myself). |
A woman talking to other females about family is culturally acceptable and often expected.
On a side note, when I was in KSA, I taught my university students the time-out "T" gesture with the understanding that it be used if they or I broached a topic that was haram or made them uncomfortable. It was rarely used. However, I recall a lesson on character traits. I asked what eccentric meant, and one of my students blurted out, "That's like Lady Gaga!" Several of her classmates and I immediately made the time-out gesture since music is a forbidden topic. We had a good laugh, but they got the point. |
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Teacher in Rome
Joined: 09 Jul 2003
Posts: 1286
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| Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2015 11:42 pm Post subject: |
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| music is a forbidden topic. |
Good lord - all music? Or only western music? Is classical western OK, or is it really, all music?? Don't these people ever sing? Or even hum? I've taught a number of middle-eastern students (tho not in Saudi) and all of them to my recollection have enjoyed music. I mean, who doesn't? |
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nomad soul
Joined: 31 Jan 2010
Posts: 11454
Location: The real world
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| Posted: Thu Aug 27, 2015 3:44 am Post subject: |
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| Teacher in Rome wrote: |
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| music is a forbidden topic. |
I've taught a number of middle-eastern students (tho not in Saudi) and all of them to my recollection have enjoyed music. I mean, who doesn't? |
There's no comparison; Saudi Arabia is extremely conservative. In fact, it's the only country in the world where women are not allowed to drive. Music isn't heard in public areas like malls, restaurants, schools, etc. Even that nondescript, 2-3 second lead music on most EFL audio files is likely to be deleted. Private higher ed institutions aren't as strict, but western music isn't played. However, music is certainly in their private lives from religious music to the latest Arabic and English pop tunes.
Rather than turning this thread into a commentary about KSA's culture, I hope the OP sees why it's key to gain a basic understanding of his client/students' world. I suggest that he start conversation sessions with new clients by asking if there are any topics they don't want to talk about as well as those they're interested in (even if that means idioms). |
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Nicky_McG
Joined: 24 Apr 2006
Posts: 190
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| Posted: Thu Aug 27, 2015 9:45 am Post subject: |
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| spiral78 wrote: |
Ditto if the OP had, as I suggested two pages ago, offered to prepare a next lesson on idioms. We don't have info on whether the student was rude in his request-only that the OP was nonplussed that a student would not follow the teacher's lead passively. I think the OP has received useful input here, including but not limited to that stuff you consider too harsh.
I myself would never ask a new student about personal stuff unrelated to English lessons like family details and military rank, and I can easily see how a new student might well prefer strongly to move on to a more neutral topic; in this case, idioms.
This is why nomad soul has pointed out that this particular 'job' isn't giving the OP much in the way of useful experience-they evidently suggest asking what many may consider personal questions. Scot was correct to point put that this can be unacceptable in some cultures.
Not harsh-useful. |
What's ironic is that they very people giving this advice are also trying to lecture the OP on how to behave towards students when they exhibit a lack of tact in their answers. Indeed, they're displaying the exact kind of behavior towards the OP that they're telling him to avoid.
Since when was asking about family a taboo topic? I've been teaching for nine years and it's never been a taboo topic for any of my students who have been from all countries and cultures. It's even in most lower level textbooks. If you occassionally get a student who doesn't want to talk about it that doesn't mean the teacher has done anything wrong. He'll just know not to do it next time. People are making such a big deal about it on here.
The only topics I'd tend to avoid would be religion and probably politics (though that depends on the student). You can never know that there might be an area that is sensitive to a particular students and most reasonable students will just tell you politely that they don't want to talk about it. I feel it's unreasonable to expect the OP to know about all the different cultures of the World and the do's and don't's of each. If he were living in KSA then fair enough, but he's teaching online.
If I were a student, I'd feel pretty uncomfortable being asked what topics were taboo (and I don't think I could think of everything off the top of my head) |
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