Job Discussion Forums

Babala · Joined: 28 Jan 2005 Posts: 1303 Location: Henan

In my experience I would say that Chinese women seem to be more "snoopy" than the men. I have more women looking thru my class papers than men. I have lived with my bf (Chinese) for a year now and he has no interest in looking thru my things. Even I tell him to get something out of my bag he will bring the bag to me for me to get it out for him. I would be interested in hearing other people's opinions on who they think is the "snoopier sex"

Old Dog · Joined: 22 Oct 2004 Posts: 564 Location: China

Roger wrote:

hesterprynne · Joined: 16 Sep 2003 Posts: 386

Some things need to be taught. Just because I am in another country I do not cease to be a person with boundaries. I doubt sincerely that students- or their parents- would do things to a Chinese teacher that they do to me- look through attendance, etc. Can't do too much with parents- but when it comes to students of any age I am the authority figure. Guess the golden rule is to be polite but firm, and just as with any discipline, approach from attitude of helping the disciplinee function in future endeavors!

tofuman · Joined: 02 Jul 2004 Posts: 937

Old Dog,

Why not try to feel Roger's pain? Apparently, he was planning on getting engaged to a woman who was going to steal his traveler's cheques. Being the eternal optimist, he charged onward. Now he is married to a woman who steals from him, not only cash, but apparently wanted to get his "villa" out from under him as well.

This is a time for compassion rather than condemnation, for understanding and sympathy, not contempt and ridicule. Even I, as hard-hearted and jaded as I am, have been touched with the feeling of his infirmity.

Do you not hear his cry for help? Have you no decency?

7969 · Joined: 26 Mar 2003 Posts: 5782 Location: Coastal Guangdong

nice hijacking of the thread..... Very Happy

Old Dog · Joined: 22 Oct 2004 Posts: 564 Location: China

Forgive me, 7969. For my part, I was carried away by incredulity and prurience.

lily · Joined: 02 Aug 2004 Posts: 200

Old Dog, YIKES!! Asking for that level of detail from Roger makes you as bad as any of the Chinese snoopers mentioned on this thread. Not to mention the considerable dangers of publishing that kind of info on the net.

As tofuman said, try some compassion.

I teach Primary school kids so I didn't really mind them going through my teaching stuff last year - I don't take anything personal to class - but maybe this year I'll stop them doing that, otherwise as older students they'll keep doing it. Not good. Thanks for the heads-up guys.

7969 · Joined: 26 Mar 2003 Posts: 5782 Location: Coastal Guangdong

as i just posted elsewhere on this site, while discussing my exit from this school with a chinese colleague, he proceeded to sift thru a pile of personal mail (already opened) that i recieved in a package from home this morning. i was speechless......

Roger · Joined: 19 Jan 2003 Posts: 9138

I had an unexpected hearty chuckle this morning reading Dogmatic Oldie's riposte.
He managed to hijack this thread through my own carelessness.

He has painted himself into that extreme corner - did he write "prurience"? Never mind. I was told by a more circumspect fellow forumite that Dogmaticf Oldie is vicious. He certainly is - to me. But I have also learnt from someone else that he is in point of fact a most charming old gentleman if you meet him face to face.

Perhaps not to everybody.

Anyway, when I left my home this morning I became witness to a scene that I think is "normal" only in China (maybe in other developing countries too).
It was drizzling and foggy, visibility pretty low; ahead of me a tree and two men standing there, something on the floor.
Passing by the first man I noticed the object on the floor was a human body. The first man was taking pictures, several, I don't know how many, endlessly; the second man was a policeman. Next to the sidewalk were parked one police car and a limousine.
I looked at the face of the person on the floor - a gray-haired man. His shirt was open in front; his skin yellow; now I realised the crowd of onlookers standing at a safe distance under the canopy of a bank were watching as the policeman pulled the trousers of the old man down; he wore a gray underpant. They lifted it so they could see underneath... in full view of all those starers. They didn't pull up his trousers and turned him over for more pictures.

What struck me the most was the nonchalance with which these officials were performing their jobs; children, young couples, housewives, teachers, bank employees all passed by in full view of a nearly-naked, dead old man

hhyy · Joined: 23 Sep 2004 Posts: 100

7969 · Joined: 26 Mar 2003 Posts: 5782 Location: Coastal Guangdong

i'll tell u after i leave china..... one thing i've learned while here is to trust noone Very Happy

ivytony · Posted: Tue Apr 05, 2005 3:23 am Post subject: Re: Monkeys

7969 · Joined: 26 Mar 2003 Posts: 5782 Location: Coastal Guangdong

Road_runner · Joined: 07 Mar 2005 Posts: 8 Location: Canada

I hear ye I hear ye and I hear all of ye!!!

Imagine, please, of a group of people who have been " shut out" literally from the rest of the world, until just recently, a mear 20 or so years.
Just imagine, if you were one of them and then, you are allowed to look and smell and rub elbows with the rest of humanity (still not you going to meet them but a privileged few come to live near you). Can you imagine how you will behave, react, and live? I bet you will try to fill that curiousity void every chance you get. And in the most unorthodoxed manner imaginable......

That, ladies and gents, is the result of a controlled society. Finally the SINO-curiosity and learning hunger is being "allowed" to be satisfied.
Anything parallel to this phenomenon in the West? How about the when the East Germans were allowed to meet the West Germans? How about a prisoner in isolation for years and suddenly he is allowed to wander out the locked door? Can you imagine their reaction and behaviour?

How should you take this utter lack of respect for privacy? Just imagine your neighbour just got his new car parked in the drive way, how would you react? You think your neighbour will get all hairy when you want to touch his car and sit behind the wheel? I 'd say you should interpret it as a "complement" of sorts that they are at ease with you. I don't think there is malise intent.

Remember during their Cultural Revolution, the Chinese person couldn't even trust his own family. He feared all and he avoided all.

When will it end? When privacy in China becomes less of a luxury item or when the Chinese people learn more about the non-China. When it is commonly taught in their schools to respect privacy. Or when you and I become old and grey!!!

That is my 24 cents worth.

Roger · Joined: 19 Jan 2003 Posts: 9138

Ah yes, this thread is mainly about privacy.
Just yesterday I read a column in which a Japanese opined that CHinese apparently lack modesty when privacy is the issue because the horrors visited upon the CHinese during the cult revolution necessitated a wholesale behavioral change: everybody had to use the loos without closing doors. The Red Guards wanted to know whether you were reading verboten literature on the toilets.

True - even nowadays many public conveniences have not doors. And people go about doing their business in the most childish innocence.
Also, they keep their front doors open and you can watch all manner of family events unfolding - while they can monitor who is visiting the laowai on the third floor.