Job Discussion Forums

[Gordon]

Let me go back to show you what I said.

[Wolf]

As the first person to bite back at Gordon, I officially accept his apology, and offer my own. He didn't say that all people who don't have kids are selfish - and I wanted to make clear that I wasn't.

[Cleopatra]

may I add that I never said that all parents are selfish - just that many parents have kids for selfish motives.

I still stand by my earlier point that it's illogical to call people who do not add to the world's population as 'selfish'. As I said, if you don't create a new person, you cannot be selfish with regards to the person you have not created!

And of course parents care about their children but I don't feel that the mere fact of having kids neccessarily transforms someone into a 'caring' person. Some extremely selfish people love their kids passionately - but couldn't give a toss about other people's kids!

[nomadder]

To split the hair just once more there is one place where you said many people are selfish so to me that means more than 50%. I haven't mastered the quote function so I can't demonstrate. Anyway who really cares. Western societies are quite selfish and materialistic, kids or no kids. Sometimes having kids makes one less selfish but not always.

I for one would love to divest myself of my meagre possessions and go sit atop a mountain and meditate or something like that. There's another reason not to have kids.

[leeroy]

Hell, I'll come straight out and admit it.

I am selfish. I want my money for me! Mind you, I am 23, and I don't have much of it...

[Capergirl]

[struelle]

[leeroy]

These days, it is insulting if I offer to pay for a woman as it implies that any later "events" will have been indirectly purchased by myself.

[Capergirl]

[leeroy]

Sexual equality goes both ways man!

If women don't want to be chained to the kitchen any more, then they can buy their own drinks!

[Will.]

Sorry Gordon,

I did not intend my post to invoke all these responses but merely to agree with you that at least one person admitted ( 2 now!, thanks Leeroy!) to being selfish and didn't put up a fight about being so.

Oh Leeroy... Now I know why all these European ladies I meet keep asking me out to dinner and insisting on paying for me.....

Now seriously, If I ask someone if they would like a drink or a meal it is my suggestion and I expect to pay for no other reason than the desire to offer something pleasant to someone whose company is enjoyable and of interest to me. It is my offer. I don't use do you want a drink? as a chat up line as I do not offer until I feel the desire to offer, be their glass empty or full.
Should I expect this meagre purchase to lead to something else it is only myself I am deceiving and this includes expecting them, male or female to buy me one back and vice versa, if they do, I can accept or refuse. This does not entitle them to think they will gain anything from me except that I will drink or eat with them and share my/their company.
I have no qualms about allowing a lady to pay for my meal, this does happens quite a bit too, if it makes her happy.

[leeroy]

[Capergirl]

Hey Leeroy, you're 23? That's what I said when I was 23, too.

As for the "sexual equality" comment (you didn't really think I'd let that go, did you? ), I don't think buying someone a drink makes you a chauvanist. However, most women these days are used to buying their own drinks and have no problem doing so. They might even buy one for a cute guy in the bar. Do men not like this type of "equality"? As for actual dates, I go by the rule of 'the one who does the asking does the paying'.

Will sounds like my kind of guy.

[monty97]

This is probably a deeply cynical view but I suspect many people have children so they can have power over something. Like those fools who have dogs and spend their time (comically) asserting themselves over them.

People who have kids are victims of their genes. They wish to create another 'them' to pass into the world. If people were really altruistic they would give a good home to many of the kids who are in need - but no, that would be too risky, what if the kid didn't turn out like us. Personally i think you've failed as a human being if you're too alike your parents.

And before anybody accuses me of being a mean-spirited curmudgeon i should hastily point out that i sponsor two kids through a charitable organization.

I've nothing against children just the people who wield power over them .I have no desire for such power and don't feel myself to be qualified for the responsibility.

[khmerhit]