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desert_traveller · Joined: 28 Nov 2006 Posts: 335

Typical conversation between me and a Saudi, initiated by him:

Saudi: 'Where are you from?'
Me: 'Xyz.'
Saudi: 'Muslim?'

I really can't stand when they do that. I sort of understand (even if I don't like and think it's gross backward narrow minded discrimination) that the way they are brought up and their culture is, they NEED to know the answer to that question to know how to relate to you. It matters to them. But I still feel offended, because in my opinion, it's none of their business. So, the conversation can develop along two different lines: you tell them what you are, whether yes or no, and by doing that acknowledge their right to know that in my opinion very personal information about you, and possibly encourage further quizzing. Or, you refuse/avoid/get around giving an answer, in which case the Saudi gets offended, because he, the crown of creation, the embodiment of perfection, radiating grace and enlightenment just by talking to you, feels entitled to interrogate you. In some cases, who gives a fig, but in some other cases, you don't necessarily want to get into a conflict, no matter how minor. So, I just wonder, if you guys have been in this situation, and if yes, how you handled it?

johnslat · Posted: Fri Oct 17, 2014 2:04 pm Post subject:

Dear desert_traveller,

In 19 years in Saudi, I can't recall being asked that once. I don't mean to get personal, but would it have anything to do with one's nationality, do you think?

Regards,
John

scot47 · Joined: 10 Jan 2003 Posts: 15343

I never found it offensive. Why would I ? Why should I expect others to see the world through the same prism as I see it ?

Mushkilla · Joined: 17 Apr 2014 Posts: 320 Location: United Kingdom

lcanupp1964 · Joined: 12 Dec 2009 Posts: 381

While living in Japan, I was asked about a million times if I liked "Nato". In South Korea, I was asked if I ever had dog stew.

I think it's a fair question to ask if someone is Muslim if that person lives in KSA. I've been asked that question at least a thousand times over my five years. Maybe they are just trying to understand why anyone would live here without being one. Confused

The Fifth Column · Posted: Fri Oct 17, 2014 3:21 pm Post subject:

dragonpiwo · Joined: 04 Mar 2013 Posts: 1650 Location: Berlin

"Teacher. Why you no Muslim?"
"I'll answer that when you can use the verb to be."

johnslat · Posted: Fri Oct 17, 2014 3:37 pm Post subject:

Dear dragonpiwo,

Well, it could be just the helping verb that's missing (and the plural proper noun)

"Teacher, why __________ you know Muslims?

Regards,
John Very Happy

veiledsentiments · Joined: 20 Feb 2003 Posts: 17644 Location: USA

scot47 · Joined: 10 Jan 2003 Posts: 15343

The OP expects everyone to behave the good folks in Iowa.

nomad soul · Joined: 31 Jan 2010 Posts: 11454 Location: The real world

As VS pointed out, it's just cultural. Ditto her comments about us female expats being asked not just the religion question, but ones about marriage and babies as well---and that's by men and women, regardless of nationality. I usually give a short answer and then change the subject to focus back on them and not on me.

The Fifth Column · Posted: Fri Oct 17, 2014 5:33 pm Post subject:

jaffa · Joined: 25 Oct 2012 Posts: 403

I've been asked why I don't become a muslim a few times. Apparently it increases their chances of getting a ticket on the magic bus to heaven if I convert. Why on earth would I do that? is my answer and it confuses them.

coder · Joined: 12 Jun 2014 Posts: 94 Location: USA

I'm a little perplexed by this thread. Has anyone here ever lived in Latin America? If you're a female beyond, say, 40 years of age, the default assumption by the locals is that you are or were once married and have all kinds of children all over the place. That assumption is a much stronger and public issue in a Latin country than in any MENA country.

In fact, such an assumption is predominant in all 3d world countries (I know the last phrase has dropped from usage, but still.....) and not just in L.A. or MENA. And if you think the Gulf countries are NOT 3d world countries (and all that that used to imply), well, we disagree.

In fact, if you go into the interiors of any of the States of the Union, I assure you that you will find attitudes rooted in the 18th century still going strong as ever, especially as regards marital issues - and if you ever have occasion to visit Salt Lake City, well, let me leave it at that.

KSA attitudes in this regard are far from being unusual - in fact you could say they are practically universal.

MENA_chica · Joined: 28 Sep 2014 Posts: 82 Location: Middle East

I haven't been asked if I'm Muslim, but about my religion, mostly during class introductions (not in Saudi Arabia, but in the region). The students always seemed somewhat satisfied when I answered "I'm a Christian". I suppose they prefer a claim to a religion than no religion. One student even presented me with an English version of the Holy Quran, and she proceeded to mark a number of passages that she wanted me to read that were very important to her, which I thought was very thoughtful.

I suppose in The West we separate religion from culture, politics, education etc., whereas in the Middle East, Islam is (more or less) THE system rather than part of it. As such, the absence of that question would surprise me, as I've come to expect it.