Job Discussion Forums

dmb · Joined: 12 Feb 2003 Posts: 8397

I found this. It's a 5 minute video clip from the makers Of South Park before they came meanstream.
IF SWEARING OFFENDS YOU DONT OPEN IT. If you are a fan of South Park you'll love this early footage of Kenny et al

http://www.maxim-magazine.co.uk/?/truthandlies/relish/relish.php?id=12218

distiller · Joined: 31 May 2004 Posts: 249

I was hoping this would be a theoretical discussion on who would win a fight between Jesus and Santa. We could throw in the Easter Bunny, Buddha, Moses, Ganesh, and Mohamed on the undercard or just put them all in a steel cage ala pro wrestling.

Better yet as long as I'm dreaming we could just throw ol' George W. in a ring with Saddam or Bin Laden. I'm pretty sure Saddam would whoop his asss but Bin Laden's got kidney issues. All I know is nobody could beat George Washington becuase my US text book told me he was eight feet tall and ate oak trees and saw dust mills for breakfast before he went out to molest his slaves every morning.

Yes, I am taking a break from some mind numbing marking.

marblez · Joined: 24 Oct 2004 Posts: 248 Location: Canada

It's pretty obvious that the Easter Bunny would win. Although Ganesh has the advantage of tusks, the Easter Bunny's thick hopping legs could kick the crap out of anyone!

distiller · Joined: 31 May 2004 Posts: 249

Yeah, but Jesus and Santa have all kinds of magic powers and stuff. I could imagine Jesus giving the Easter Bunny leprosy and his legs just falling right off.

marblez · Joined: 24 Oct 2004 Posts: 248 Location: Canada

But could Jesus microwave a burrito so hot that even He could not eat it?
- Homer

PS. I was not aware that Santa had powers. I see him as an authoritarian figure and slave-driver (not to be confused with sled-driver), as he has massive groups of elves under his control.

distiller · Joined: 31 May 2004 Posts: 249

Santa does fit his rather wide posterior through chimneys and manages to fly all over the world and deliver presents to kids all in one night. So you could say that he has magic powers. The elf question is interesting. Are they slaves or private contractors? Is there an elf union? Is the work only seasonal? And if Santa really is their master and they the slaves, he may be more ferocious and a better fighter than we ever imagined!

carnac · Posted: Wed Dec 15, 2004 9:28 am Post subject:

I'm happy to see this discussion since I have determined, after long minutes of deep research, how it is that Santa manages to visit as many places as he does without atmospheric friction burning him and his reindeer to a crisp! It's all very simple. Santa et al are actually quantum particles similar to quarks and neutrinos. Within the parameters set by the Heisenburg Uncertainty Principle, Santa is everywhere and nowhere at the same time. His position or velocity may be measured, but not both simultaneously.
I am hoping to have the full research paper published in The Journal of Nuclear Physicists any day now. They have not actually responded as yet, but I'm convinced they're just taking the time to verify my irrefutable data. Unless the mail room in my health care facility is holding out on me. Hmmm.
Excuse me, it's time for my meds.