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kneezah
Joined: 06 Feb 2004
Posts: 13
Location: Taiwan
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 Posted: Sun Jan 02, 2005 6:56 am Post subject: Feeling a little homesick |
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I'd like to think of myself as a very cool international traveller who doesn't get homesick...
But after being in Taiwan for 7 month I'm starting to realize I'm not quite as cool as I thought I was. I'm starting to feel homesickness creeping in. I miss my friends, family, local coffee joint, etc. 
I don't plan on returning to my native country anytime soon, nor do I really want to. I love living in Taiwan...
Does anyonew else here feel homesick? Any suggestions about getting over it?
Any advice would be appreciated. |
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Fortigurn
Joined: 29 Oct 2003
Posts: 390
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| Posted: Sun Jan 02, 2005 7:14 am Post subject: |
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We've just hit the 6 month mark, and whilst we're missing some friends and family, the fact of the matter is that we're really getting more comfortable being here.
We initially intended to be here for 1 year. After a few months we thought we'd be here for probably 2 years. These days we're talking about where the kids will be attending school in 5 years time.
I think the issue of missing friends and family depends on whether or not you've made a paradigm shift regarding where your home is. To us, this is home, so we now think of friends and family back in 'home number one' as no different to friends and family elsewhere in the country when we originally lived there. |
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EphemeralReal
Joined: 05 Dec 2004
Posts: 35
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| Posted: Sun Jan 02, 2005 8:56 am Post subject: |
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Creature the comforts help me and my friend. We sit in the parks and admire sometimes being away. Our minds are fuzzed from things too, homesickness comes. I tellyou this so you get happy.
Work. Get your minds off of the self and things. Taiwan is no happy home. Lonelyness is a part of life and there is always a sunnier day for us. My boyfriend says, "Even the sun shines on the dogs asses every once a while." |
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TaoyuanSteve
Joined: 05 Feb 2003
Posts: 1028
Location: Taoyuan
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| Posted: Sun Jan 02, 2005 12:04 pm Post subject: |
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| Take a trip home for a visit. It'll help your homesick feelings. In my first year here, I took a trip home near the end of my first contract. It got rid of a lot of my homesickness and helped reaffirm my decision to come here (after three weeks to a month back home, you'll be ready to come back). Haven't been back in a while myself. I'm overdue. |
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Twisting in the Wind
Joined: 20 Oct 2003
Posts: 571
Location: Purgatory
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| Posted: Mon Jan 03, 2005 4:45 am Post subject: |
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Throw yourself into work as much as possible so you won't have time to think about yourself and your feelings (like another poster noted)
Go to a restaurant or coffee shop that serves fast food you like/miss/had back home, such as MacDonalds, Starbucks, etc Food for me was a big part of homesickness when I was overseas
Find someone to speak English with on your time off,
yet, ironically, the faster you adapt and become cross-cultural, the faster you'll get over your homesickeness!
Try not to have one foot in Taiwan, the other foot on a plane back to your home country. If you find your thoughts going into this mode, try to think about something else, do something else.
Get a pet.Or volunteer at a local animal shelter, if there is one. When I got a pet my mood changed DRAMATICALLY. A pet will give you something to love and that will love you unconditionally. It will wait for you to come home and be happy to see you.
Have any spiritual beliefs? Pray more. Meditate more. Join a Bible Study.
Call and email friends and family with more regularity. Tell them you NEED them to do the same for you. When I was overseas, this was BEFORE email. And where I was we had no phones. No matter how hard you "think" it is, you probably have it far easier than earlier generations of expats had it.
DON'T get down on yourself for "not getting over" your homesickness "more quickly." Although there are predictable "markers, everyone is on his/her own schedule. It may take you a little longer than the teacher down the hall. That's ok. You are you. If you weren't exposed to living in another country and experiencing another language when you were younger, it might be hard(er)for you.
Feel free to PM me.I had a horrible time with culture shock and homesickness. Although I was in Latin America and not Taiwan, the feelings are pretty much the same. Good luck!
Twisting in the Wind |
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TaoyuanSteve
Joined: 05 Feb 2003
Posts: 1028
Location: Taoyuan
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| Posted: Mon Jan 03, 2005 5:19 am Post subject: |
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I agree with a lot of the sentiment written by the last poster. However, I'd disagree with one point: the one about work.
Too often people come here and work too many hours. It's very easy to do here as English teaching work is so plentiful. So, I think the opposite of what was suggested is better advice for Asia. Don't work too many hours and don't throw yourself into your work. Make sure you have enough time in your life for the things you enjoy. Take a language course, join a gym or take a walk. Take days off, get out of the city and see the rest of Taiwan. Just make sure you're making time for you.
And make sure you get out of here a couple times a year for a vacation. |
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Fortigurn
Joined: 29 Oct 2003
Posts: 390
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| Posted: Mon Jan 03, 2005 6:59 am Post subject: |
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| TaoyuanSteve wrote: |
I agree with a lot of the sentiment written by the last poster. However, I'd disagree with one point: the one about work.
Too often people come here and work too many hours. It's very easy to do here as English teaching work is so plentiful. So, I think the opposite of what was suggested is better advice for Asia. Don't work too many hours and don't throw yourself into your work. Make sure you have enough time in your life for the things you enjoy. Take a language course, join a gym or take a walk. Take days off, get out of the city and see the rest of Taiwan. Just make sure you're making time for you.
And make sure you get out of here a couple times a year for a vacation. |
I agree with this. I'm working about 20 hours a week, when back in Australia I worked 40 hours a week. The difference to my quality of life and general stress levels is simply astonishing.
Back home, I had 8 weeks of paid leave, which I used to crave. Here, I have 4 weeks of unpaid leave. In the last 6 months I've only used 14 days of it, and still I don't feel in need of another break even now. I've also had only one sick day. |
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Twisting in the Wind
Joined: 20 Oct 2003
Posts: 571
Location: Purgatory
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| Posted: Mon Jan 03, 2005 8:33 pm Post subject: |
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| TaoyuanSteve wrote: |
I agree with a lot of the sentiment written by the last poster. However, I'd disagree with one point: the one about work.
Too often people come here and work too many hours. |
OK, yeah, I hear you, and also the other poster who agreed that working a lot of hours might not be good.
Where I was, work was THE only activity to do. We had no email, no cinema, no shopping, no nothing, so it was the only thing I could do really to keep busy and get my mind off my culture shock/homesickness. Work helped me. But it might not help others. Ever tried working even in your home country when you were so stressed out you couldn't think?
I think the important thing is to listen to your body and emotions. Do what feels GOOD to you. If you're overwhelmed by feelings of homesickness, maybe the best thing to do would be to try to find someone to take your class and go to an internet cafe and email in English for awhile. On the other hand, sometimes when I was homesick going to class was the best thing for me because the ss would end up cheering me up. Or I could sort of steer the class toward a topic of "How do YOU Deal with loneliness? What do you do when you're lonely?" And the ss will give suggestions. That has helped me in the past, too.
Of course, you just can't call in sick EVERYTIME you feel homesick, or some teachers would NEVER go to class  You have to listen to your emotions and decide is this "an emergency here" and then act accordingly.
One time I called in sick after my Dad died. I had taught the AM class, and just couldn't face the PM one. It was hard to explain to my boss at the time. I just said, "I'm sick," which was sort of the truth--I needed some mental health time out. |
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matchstick_man
Joined: 21 May 2003
Posts: 244
Location: Taiwan
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| Posted: Tue Jan 04, 2005 1:46 am Post subject: |
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| You've reached the 7 month mark. Usually this is when this feeling first seriously sets in. I got seriously sick of Chinese culture around this time. I agree with not working too many hours. I found thirty teaching hours a week was seriously draining and left Taiwan for six months. I agree with Taoyuan's Steve's suggestion however if you are in very small town Taiwan you may have no idea how to do many of things. I didn't know how to take a bus for my first six months here. |
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kneezah
Joined: 06 Feb 2004
Posts: 13
Location: Taiwan
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| Posted: Tue Jan 04, 2005 3:55 pm Post subject: |
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Thank you so much for the helpful advice everyone! I'm glad that there are people out there that have had similar feelings.
I'm not sure if I'll be up for working more than 8 hours a day. When I first got here I was working about 10 and I wasn't thrilled.
I do plan to return home in September for a couple of months. I'm already thinking of staying in Taiwan for additional year after my holiday.
I was actually considering getting a pet. However I wasn't sure if I would be able to bring a cat or dog back to Canada. I noticed in a previous post that dogs from Taiwan don't need to be quarantined when they enter Canada...
Does any one know the procedure? Is it costly? |
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