Job Discussion Forums

[schminken]

Ok, This is a topic that is not discussed much here on the forum but I'm going to give it a whirl. I worry a lot. I am basically introverted and shy. I don't like getting up in front of people. Did I also mention that I am a teacher?

Now before you attack me with " Boy, are you ever in the wrong profession", let me tell you I have a lot of experience and I am trained. I do my job and I do it well. The problem is how I feel before the lesson. I worry about it constantly. I teach adults and I know they expect a lot. I prepare hours and hours for a 2 hour lesson and I still feel it's not good enough. People say they are nervous when they first start teaching but it eventually goes away. The butterflies in my stomach have never gone away! It takes all of my mental and emotional resources to do a good lesson. The students don't notice my anxiety but afterwards I just feel emotionally drained. I have to develop all my own material and the students are advanced learners so I feel like its never good enough. I am constantly revamping everything and fine tuning. I am always thinking about how the students are evualating me and if they are actually learning anything useful. It's so draining. I go home and I can't switch off. If I hear one semicritical remark through the school grapevine, I take it pretty hard. Am I taking things too seriously?

So my questions is: Do any of you all ever feel nervous int he classroom? Do you have any suggestions how I could relax a little bit? I think some it has to do with working in a different cultural environment. I don't know all the rules and I am afraid of failure. Any suggestions would be great! I am starting to make myself sick over this.

[lajzar]

The first time I ever stood in front of a class, I found myself hyperventilating. I continued as best as I could, but I decided it was time to stop talking when I felt my fingers going numb from too much oxygen. I just stood there for five minutes, silently trying to control my breathing, while feeling very light headed and with a strong urge to lie down suddenly.

It doesn't get any easier.

[M.K.]

schminken,
Maybe it would help to put yourself in your students shoes. Who knows, maybe they are even more nervous than you? I remember having to speak in front of the class when I took French years ago, and it was terrifying. I had the accent all wrong, my pronunciation was bad, and my voice just sounded funny to me in this other language. It might help to consider this, and realize they're not analyzing you as closely as you may think.
You also sound like a bit of a perfectionist. Nothing wrong with that (I'm one too!), but maybe instead of doing SO much prep before class, you should try doing something you enjoy that has nothing to do with teaching. Read a favorite book, take a walk, etc. Just an idea...

[dorum]

YES, you're taking it a little too seriously! Please don't take this as a flippant remark - I'm shy, and know exactly how you feel (i've felt that way before - a million times).
Just try to put it out of your mind, remember that someone will ALWAYS disagree with you or critisise you - to others if not yourself, and tell yourself - 'I don't care - they're not people I know, therefore they are not people whose opinion is important!'
Listen to REAL friends for constructive criticism, and remember there's a fine line between being able to take it and listening to any old cr*p (particularly the stuff that goes through your own mind in these situations) - hang in there and KNOW you're doing your best, which is probably a lot better than those that went before you!

Best of luck!!

[grahamb]

A perfectly valid topic that�s definitely worth discussing. Thanks for raising it.
A few years ago I was exactly the same, but teaching actually helped me overcome my shyness. It didn�t happen overnight, of course.
I agree with MK that maybe you expect too much of yourself. Are you fairly new to teaching? How old are you? Youth and lack of experience could be a factor here.
Student feedback is a funny thing. It�s great when someone says "I enjoyed the class," but here in Spain they tend not to say much unless they�re UNhappy. So, no news is usually good news.
Are your classes serious affairs, or is there scope to do something lighter? If it�s the latter, how about using some game-based activities? Putting more of the onus on the students is one way of reducing teacher input and maximising student output.
Is your relationship with your students relaxed or formal? Is there any way you can develop a more relaxed relationship? Is going out for a beer feasible in your case?
MK�s right about students being nervous. At the moment I�m using songs as a way of helping my teenage students overcome their embarrassment.
We sing together, so everyone gains confidence and no-one feels stupid.
If possible, try it with your students. Believe me, it works.
As I said earlier, you don�t become Mr Confident overnight. It takes time and effort, so hang on in there.
I hope this helps.

[PanamaTeacher]

Schminken--

I see 3 issues

1. shyness/stagefright/performance anxiety

[schminken]

Thank you all so much for the encouraging words and helpful suggestions! I am glad to know I am not alone with this. The issue is rarely discussed and when I read the forums, I think "Wow, everyone seems to have it all together. Why can't I do that?" Grahamb, I am also teaching in a culture where no one really comments on anything unless it's to point out something that is wrong. I talk to the students and try to get some feedback but they all claim it's ok. It's only when I hear from another teacher something that a student may have said that I find out if the class didn't like or enjoy something I did. It is usually weeks after the fact and makes me feel miserable.

I have only been teaching for 4 years and this is the first time I have had complete control over what I teach. The lessons and organization of the course are up to me. There are no books. I thought this would be great but I find myself on the neverending quest for "the perfect lesson". The students are in my age group. This usually isn't a problem but sometimes I wonder if they would be happier with an older teacher.

PT, you are right. I have a gigantic case of performance anxiety. I want everything to be perfect. I know I can't please every student and some will never like me no matter what I do. But I wish I could reach everybody and everyone would at least find English tolerable.

Sigh. You all are right. I should take a walk or read a good book....

[thelmadatter]

I thought A LOT of teachers were introverts. I sure am. I feel comfortable in a nice structured class but put me in a party Voila! instant wallflower

[SueH]

A lot of what you said sounds familiar, although I can say that as I get nearer 50 I've learnt to cover my shyness a bit and sometimes when I'm really performing (job interviews for example) people find it difficult to believe I'm fundamentally shy.

I think we all occasionally take ages over a particular lesson (often round about observation time ), but taking five hours too often for an hour tends to get a bit impractical!

Have you thought about having a slot within your class which is unstructured, or driven by the sts request, or an occasional lesson based on a suggestion box idea; anything to introduce some spontaneity and see how the students and you react. Use fasching for the opportunity for some off the wall ideas..

But above all, don't take my suggestions too seriously

[grahamb]

Schminken, if I were teaching under the same circumstances as you ("no books"), I�d go CRAZY! For what it�s worth, you have my sympathy.
Remember that many students are sent to classes by their employers. Some go willingly enough, but there are others who are more than a little reluctant. The latter are often very hard to please, so don�t lose any sleep worrying about what they said weeks ago.
I�ve got to admit, I�m always looking for "the perfect lesson" as well, even though I know it�s pie in the sky.
Thelmadatter, I know EXACTLY what you mean. I don�t even go NEAR parties because I just clam up.

[C76]

Oh dear.

I understand what you're saying, schminken.

Mind you, though, my symptoms haven't been the same as yours. I've developed a teaching "zone".

(Keep in mind that I am a TESL student.)

Maybe a part of your problem is your mindset.

I read that you have complete control of your students curriculum.

At times I think it's easy to get bogged down in your perception of your responsibilities. When I first began, I grappled with the idea that "I am an ambassador of The King's English. Everything I have to say must sound perfect. I must be able to answer all of my students questions perfectly. All the time."

I agree with grahamb's qs about how formal your relationship is with your students. Some of the chill was taken off me once I started talking to my pupils as people.

(At one point I used to think I had to be my students' SUPREME LEADER. That notion died quickly. Especially when I figured out that we were all basically around the same age.)

Just know that you are there to help your students. You are there to facilitate their learning. Not keep them in check with a whip and gavel. You can only do your best. Also, you are not infallible. Keep in mind that we're all human. If they ask you a grammar question, and you don't know the answer, don't be ashamed to say, "I don't know. I'll have to look it up for you." Surely they'll understand.

Again, I think grahamb's on to something. It might be wise to do something to bridge the gap...show your students that you're on an equal playing field. If you're not allowed to be social...Perhaps an unusual or fun activity.

[dyak]

A few more thoughts for the pile�

Schminken, you do have a lot responsibility and I think the weight of that is a negative influence on your �performance� � a word I�m slightly concerned about when it comes to EFL teaching. Being a musician beforehand prepared me immensely for this job but in my mind you �perform� for an audience and �teach� a class; I�m not saying there isn�t a performance element in EFL teaching but they�re learning from you not watching you. I�ve seen too many self-absorbed teachers that just don�t listen to the students.

I try to practice what I call �letting go of the lesson�, having a plan but making it flexible enough so as to �pass the ball� to the students when the time is right. You�ve 4 years experience; this is more than enough to be able to improvise for any length of time, to go with what�s on the students� minds rather than the regimented approach. The best lessons I�ve done are where I�ve hardly spoken at all, where I�ve stepped back just to guide and correct. It almost creates the �break time� atmosphere during the lesson, where, in a multi-lingual class, the students really open up� it is about them after all.

As for your energy, hours and hours of planning ironically robs you of the energy to teach the lesson you�ve spent so long meticulously preparing. Student centred lessons are far less draining and much more fun for the students (and the teacher!).

I hope this helps, I could write more but then I could be full of s*** too.

Cheers.

[grahamb]

Spot on, Dyak. Sometimes my students tell me "Today we�d like to talk about THIS," and the planned activity goes out the window. At least they�re talking in English. As you say, the teacher can stay in the background, stepping in occasionally to give corrections or answer any questions that arise. Using the coursebook�s fine, but how many students want to stick to it religiously?

[thelmadatter]

grahamb,

Care to go with me to my next party? We can be wallflowers together

[grahamb]

Thelmadatter, If I knew how to cut and paste Emoticons, you'd see me blush online.
Mexico, eh? Sounds interesting.