Job Discussion Forums

[lionbrian]

Dear all,

Are there any teachers in the Middle East who had taught in North East Asia (Japan, Taiwan & Korea) and who are (were) married to Korean or Japanese girls? If so, could anyone there illustrate the situation?

Did these Asian girls fit well there? Hated living there? Left with kids? Complained all the time? Full integration and ended up deciding not to go home (Japan for example)?

How is the relation then? I know from the fact that especially Korean wives LOVE TO CONTROL HOUSEHOLD THINGS? Because it is simply in their bloods!

POSITIVE & NEGATIVE COMMENTS ARE APPRECIATED!

[lionbrian]

Dear potential readers,

I am really shocked Over 70 clicks BUT no post (s)!!!!

I really heard that there is (was) a KIMCHI TOWN IN MLI & UAEU. What are these guys not sharing info? What a sad thing!!!!!!!!!

P.S: May be (5 cents opinion): Korean & Japanese wives are probably able to control even speech freedom & not only HOUSEHOLD THINGS!!!!

TOO BAD!

[veiledsentiments]

Lionbrian,

I don't want you to feel ignored, but I don't fit your required profile.

I could just say that in all of my years in the Gulf, I encountered many mixed nationality marriages, but not one where the wife was Chinese, Japanese or Korean. I did work with one man who had an Indonesian wife and she seemed quite sad and lonely because she spoke little or no English.

That begs the question of why not. I could only speculate, but very few of the teachers that I worked through the years had taught in Asia. My experience was at university level and perhaps it was because of the MA requirement?? But, with the expansion of teaching institutions in the last 5 years, there must be some in the Emirates.

Perhaps you are correct and their wives won't allow them to post?? So much for the stereotype of the submissive Asian woman.

VS

[sprightly]

VS--they're only submissive in public. or if he brings home a bonus.

[globalnomad2]

Well, VS, now you've met an expat university lecturer with a Chinese wife (although you haven't met me in person). My wife is an educated career woman, Malaysian-Chinese, who went to Saudi with me when she was only 23. She could stand it there only 2 1/2 years while I stayed on for the four. Subsequently she liked the UAE a lot more during the 7 years I taught there; in Dubai she had a good career in the private sector, which she is continuing in the U.S. And you are right...Asian, especially Chinese, women are nobody's kitchen slaves--nor did I want one.

[veiledsentiments]

Ah... a virtual meeting.

VS

[Stephen Jones]

We have one guy marrried to a Mongolian, and another to a Korean. Both have been here years, and the wives seem quite happy.

[scot47]

Lots of guys with Thai wives. Some Filipina.

[Cleopatra]

I also know few, if any, couples where the wife is East Asian (other than Filipina) here in KSA. That said, I think the likliehood of such a person adapting to life here depends less on nationality than on personality and circumstances. Some "wives" hate it here and bail out of the situation (and possibly the marriage) in a matter of months. Others quite like it, create a niche - professional, social or other wise - for themselves and do their best to enjoy life. In fact, you could say the same sort of things for just about anyone who comes to KSA, whether they are here to work or as a 'spouse', whether they are Asian, "Western", Arab, whatever.

Does the woman have kids? If so, will being a stay-at-home wife and mother sufficient for her? If she wishes to work, does she work in a profession which is in demand in the Gulf? Is she outgoing and prepared to work at making friends and contacts (a neccessary social skill in this part of the world) or does she expect to fall into a ready-made community? These are just some of the more obvious questions which need to be answered before you can have any idea as to how well anyone would adapt to life in the Gulf.

[web fishing]

[abufletcher]

The dynamics, and yes economics, of international marriages is a complicated thing. I agree there seem to be very few Japanese and Korean wives of expat teachers in the Gulf.

I think this reflects the professional profiles of the husband as much as anything else. First of all, I don't know at there is a large flow of teachers from Japan/Korea to the Gulf. Partly, as VS suggests this is because a great many of the EFL teachers in Japan and Korea do not have MAs -- and in fact it tends to be these guys without an MA who more regularly end up with a Japanese or Korean wife. That in turn may simply reflect that fact that non-MA-holders are going overseas at a younger age than MA- holders and are thus less likely to be married.

I don't think a Japanese or Korean wife could expect to have a ready made community. My own wife is Mexican and while she was usually able to find one or two Mexicans around for the most part she had to fit into the Western/European expat community. And this as others have mentioned means speaking English in both public and private -- for example at all those pot-luck dinners expats are so fond of.

And of course I think a non-caucasian women in the Gulf can generally expect to have to deal with more (sometime entirely innocent) discrimination from locals, other third-world nationals, as well as western expats. My wife was commonly assumed to be the "nanny."


--Don

[rikyo]