Job Discussion Forums

maybeme · Joined: 20 Oct 2005 Posts: 2

Hi all
Just found this forum and interested in all the posts as Im moving to Oman very soon.
What Im wondering is whether anyone knows if house-sharing happens in Oman?
ie. the normal flatmates thing like in Aussie/NZ/Ireland/etc etc - group of 3 or 4 20-30 somethings sharing a house.

I know for the most part that ex-pats will have accomodation sorted by the company/uni etc so there will only be a relatively small group of people in the same boat - but for starters, if anyone knows if its a possibility, please let me know!!

Appreciate any thoughts on this ..

Thanks guys

veiledsentiments · Joined: 20 Feb 2003 Posts: 17644 Location: USA

I must say that in all of my years there, I never encountered any expat doing this. I can tell you that the government would look askance if the people in a situation like this were not all of the same sex.

The question is whether any of the landlords would rent to you.

VS

abufletcher · Posted: Sun Nov 06, 2005 4:36 am Post subject:

If it were a group of men from the sub-continent no one would think twice. But being western expats nearly everyone in the neighborhood would think that something was up. Most likely interpretations being that this is a house of gay men and finding you're getting a lot of unwelcome "visitors" or that there is something deeply suspicious about your activities.

As VS says, mixed sex would be a definitely no-no. BTW, where will you be in Oman?

maybeme · Joined: 20 Oct 2005 Posts: 2

Wow! Thats really knocked me back. Im surprised. Isn't it funny how different cultures determine certain attitudes.

In all my years living in the EU/Aussie etc I think I can safely say I have never come across somebody who hasn't shared a house at some point.

With all the respect due for the local culture, if its ok for the Indians, why would it not be ok for some white guys from Europe?

Does every single male really live on their own in a one bedroom apartment?!!

THanks for the replies guys, please tell me more!!

Cheers

Gordon · Joined: 28 Jan 2003 Posts: 5309 Location: Japan

Having never lived in the Gulf, I'll hazard a guess. You being the white professional have certain norms and expectations placed upon you. You are seen as well off and the Indians certainly are not. They could not afford to live on their own, whereas you can. The fact you choose to save money by sharing a flat is not something they would consider.

veiledsentiments · Joined: 20 Feb 2003 Posts: 17644 Location: USA

Personally I have never shared a flat or house with anyone and I know plenty of Westerners who have not. But, you have to realize that this is a very different culture. Children do NOT leave their homes before they are married - except in the last 20 years or so where some males went overseas to study. And when they return home, they move in with their parents again until marriage.

To them your idea would be considered something pitiful... that poor lower class servants might have to do. You may find some sharing in a place like Dubai, but in Oman almost all expats are there on foreign hire contracts that provide housing. So why would one want to live with a bunch of strangers?

Another detail is that there are very few young single Western expats between 20 and 30 of either sex. In all the years that I worked there, I never met one under the mid-30s. At least not one that wasn't there with their parents. I understand that some of the new colleges in the hinterlands are hiring young newbies to the field, but sharing flats in the villages would likely be even more suspect to the locals.

VS

abufletcher · Posted: Sun Nov 06, 2005 5:37 pm Post subject:

Here's a story from another culture. Before I came to Japan (and after I left Oman) I was teaching linguistics at a Mexican university. In one course (an MA class in Spanish-English contrastive linguistics) there were a couple of American students along with the Mexican students. Well, one day the topic of dialects and sociolects came up and I mentioned casually that from their speech if was quite obvious that "Matt" was from the New York area while "Joanne" was clearly from the southern US.

There was suddenly a profound and uncomfortable silence in the room and both Matt and Joanne were nervously exchanging glances.

After class, Joanne explained to me that I had inadvertently blown their cover. She and Matt, who were just fellow students, gringos, and friends, had been sharing a house to cut down on costs. But they knew that no one in Mexico would believe a young male and female in the same house weren't lovers. So they had told everyone that they were brother and sister.

Oops!

abufletcher · Posted: Sun Nov 06, 2005 5:49 pm Post subject:

BTW, you will find life in the Gulf (including Oman) very stratified. One might even say "colonial." Western expats are at the top of the expat food chain -- whether they want to be there or not. If you go to get your driver's licence you will most likely be ushered past dozens of Indians and Pakistanis who have been waiting there all day and brought right up to the window.

Of course you could protest and insist on waiting 6 hours in the line just line everyone else -- but in the end things just don't work that way. There are as Gordon rightly guesses very different standards that are applied to different expats from different countries.

One of the reasons we finally left the Middle East (though we really loved our 12 years there) was that we grew tired of deferential treatment -- or rather worried that we might come to accept it as our natural birthright. Well that's not quite true. My wife's from Mexico and in the Gulf she was seen by everyone as Philipino -- even by the other Philipinos. When she was with me (a red-faced "westerner") she was given all the usual preferred treatment. However, she also got to see (and experience) a bit of what it's like for the other numerically greater "non-elite" expats. It wasn't always a pretty picture. And it wasn't always the Omanis who were doing the discriminating.

scot47 · Joined: 10 Jan 2003 Posts: 15343

If Oman is anything like Saudi Arabia then sharing is a no-no.

Albulbul · Joined: 08 Feb 2003 Posts: 364

You may want to live like the characters in an episode of 'Friends' but that is not acceptable behavior in Oman or anywhere else in the region. Grow up.

Russell Hadd · Joined: 06 May 2004 Posts: 181

While I agree that sharing is unusual and I've not done it myself, it isn't unheard of in the region. There have been examples of people living 'Friends' style in school accommodation. These examples would of course be arranged by the employer and not by the teacher. Hopefully, the authorities will clamp down on this before it gets out of hand and too many people have to put up with it in their neighbourhood.

Stephen Jones · Joined: 21 Feb 2003 Posts: 4124

When I was in Kuwait in 1995-96 there were plenty of schools that made their Western expat teachers share accommodation.

Not many liked the idea though.

Not uncommon in Saudi either. First job I had in Jubail they stuck four of us in a villa.

abufletcher · Posted: Fri Nov 11, 2005 12:21 pm Post subject:

Yeah, now that you mention it, that's the way my first job in Saudi was too. There were two of us teachers to a "flat" and 4 flats in the villa.

Didn't seem much like an episode from Friends. More like The Odd Couple.

Tarka_littleotter · Joined: 12 Sep 2005 Posts: 69 Location: Oman

I like living on my own, and I gues when I get out there I'll be the only 25 year old girl who does!!

veiledsentiments · Joined: 20 Feb 2003 Posts: 17644 Location: USA

There probably won't be many in your age group and I doubt that any of them will be sharing. I'm with you... I have always wanted my own place...

VS