Job Discussion Forums

almuze · Joined: 25 Oct 2004 Posts: 125

my instant karma is totally out to get me!
every Turk on the block has decided I look like the type of gal who would love to give english lessons for free! arg! I know, once, a while ago, I tried to do a favour for a friend and quoted a silly low price for a group lesson, but now these are people who don't even know me!

I just got off the phone w/ a woman who desperately needed a foriegner to help her today, tom and thurs do some type of educational marketing presentation, I said "ok, I am available, but I need to know how much you were thinking of paying me" and she said "oh, well, maybe I don't need a foriegner right now. I'm sure it will be fine if I go myself."

AND, the other day I was followed into a store by a woman who wanted english lessons, and I said, I charge money for these lessons, you know. and she said, "oh, well, I guess I don't need them right now"
she followed me into the coffee shop to ask me! what was she thinking?!?

I don't even want to give these idiots private lessons, anyway, I am perfectly happy teaching small children to jump and sit (strange similarity to animal training....) but they are asking me, and then they are ALWAYS suprised when I say I expect any kind of payment at all!
humph.
so there. My husband says it is because I look nice and appraoachable, I should stop smiliing and wear more gold jewlery away from work. Maybe I will just wear a big t-shirt that says "NO", see where that gets me.

justme · Joined: 18 May 2004 Posts: 1944 Location: Istanbul

Wow, I'm glad it's not just me. Twice since I moved into my building I've had people coming to the door asking for free private lessons, for themselves or their kids. I've been stopped on the street by both men and women wanting lessons. Once a girl came into a restaurant and sat at our table saying she needed a 'friend' for English. I asked if that meant she wanted free private lessons, and she said, 'Oh, no. I just want you to be my friend to speak English.' Okay, then.

I also once had 2 girls who seemed to have just left their 1st day of elementary lessons sit themselves down at my table at a restaurant. They preceeded to giggle and whisper to each other for a few moments, then started asking things like 'How old are you?' and 'Where are you from?' I just stared at them until they went away.

People also seem to think I'm some kind of visa expert. They'll walk up to me and ask how their brother or whatever can go to America. A few months ago, my old service bus driver (from the previous year-- they take everyone's phone numbers in case they're late or something) phoned me at 8 in the morning saying his cousin's nephew or something wanted to go to America and could I help him? What, exactly, would I be able to do, I wondered. Use my personal American ties with Bush and Rumsfeld?

thrifty · Joined: 25 Apr 2006 Posts: 1665 Location: chip van

Maybe those poor old girls had a TEFLy teacher who made them do pairwork where they had an information gap and so had to ask each other questions such as what is your name, how old are you etc. Even though they knew each other because they spend break times together and go to the pastane and eat out together the TEFL "trained" teacher relentlessly made them ask questions and now they are getting their own back with you.

justme · Joined: 18 May 2004 Posts: 1944 Location: Istanbul

Yeah, or maybe they were just, um, stupid and annoying with no manners?

thrifty · Joined: 25 Apr 2006 Posts: 1665 Location: chip van

They really don't see it as wrong.

When I first moved into my flat a neigbour's kid used to come round in the evenings for help with his English homework. My wife had agreed to it and was apalled when I refused to help him and she ended up helping him. My justification was that I am teaching English all day but teachers are seen by non teachers to have easy jobs.

justme · Joined: 18 May 2004 Posts: 1944 Location: Istanbul

True. But sitting yourself at someone's table to stare and giggle is bad manners. And very annoying.

dmb · Joined: 12 Feb 2003 Posts: 8397

justme · Joined: 18 May 2004 Posts: 1944 Location: Istanbul

Lucky!!!

thrifty · Joined: 25 Apr 2006 Posts: 1665 Location: chip van

Perhaps your hair frightens them away or it makes them think that you are Lars. Or maybe because you are drinking or they cannot understand your accent.

yaramaz · Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2006 2:41 pm Post subject:

Well, I can't understand dmb anyway and I am a native speaker... Very Happy

tekirdag · Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 505

Turks do a lot for each other, even if it's their job or business, for free (or with a huge discount). "Your money is no good here" sort of thing. My husband and father in law are forever doing favours for people. I think it's all bad for the economy. There's a kind of underground barter economy so there isn't enough money circulating. Everyone's broke.... Sad

thrifty · Joined: 25 Apr 2006 Posts: 1665 Location: chip van

Everyone is always borrowing money from everybody else. If they all just kept their own money. Ali is buying a car so brother Mustafa has to lend him half the deposit. Mustafa has to keep Ali for the next year because all of Ali's money goes on the repayments. Now Mustafa has no money so he borrows money from his father who is also paying for the aunt's........

tekirdag · Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 505

I suppose I shouldn't criticize. Living in Turkey is really tough for most people. I think many EFL teachers don't realize that. Family members have to help each other or they won't survive. Really.

scot47 · Joined: 10 Jan 2003 Posts: 15343

What you need is Assertiveness Training.

That teaches you, when people ask for a favour, to say in a loud voice in a number of different languages, '******** OFF !'

almuze · Joined: 25 Oct 2004 Posts: 125

Life in Turkey may be hard for a lot of turks (let's not forget my occasional jaunts thro gececondo land whenever my husband is overwhelmed by some wierd angst) but it still gives them no right to sit and start and ask stupid questions they know are stupid.

Also, Turks don't usually stare and laugh at other Turks (that I've noticed, anyway) it would be considered really rude, but somehow, now that you are a Native English Speaker, all bets are off! Maybe she will work like a dog for free! Maybe I can pick my nose and she won't notice!

My personal fav. so far has been the "lets be friends" offer, especially when made directly to my children. Not to be a total scrouge, but I tell the kids not to speak English outside, not to be be mean, but kind of to protect against superwierdos.

And, while I am on a rant, my oldest is 6, her yabanci teacher is having my daughter translate her lesson into turkish, so the other kids can understand, I think this is cheesy, unethical, and bad teaching. among other things.
Yeah! Assertiveness training! no more California hippie for me! don't know sooo much Turkish, but I can say all the important rude things to sa[/i]