Job Discussion Forums

Itsme · Joined: 11 Aug 2004 Posts: 624 Location: Houston, TX

As a teacher, would you rather have students that liked you or students that respected you?

Do you think that it is possible for them to do both?

What are your experiences in trying to come across as being fun or serious?

In teaching 15-16 year olds, what do you think the best approach would be?

I　would rather be respected than liked, if that meant that I　was able to control the class and have them complete their assignments.

NathanRahl · Joined: 31 Aug 2006 Posts: 509

Hmm, well your kinda walking a fine line. After many years of teaching I can tell you that both are possible, it's just how you do it. First, be fair, never petty. If your firm, fair, and kind, they will both like and respect you. Don't be overly hard on students who act up, but don't ignore it either. You must above all else be fearless. Once you start fearing whether or not you are liked, they will be in control of the class, and that's not why they are there. You do not need to be Ghenghis Kahn to let them know you are in charge, nor do you need to be a pushover. Think of doing things in moderation. And, do not ignore bad behavior. Some little things are tolerable, but remember, the more you ignore, the more they think they can get away with. The truth is, being liked by them should not even enter your mind, because, if you teach well, are engaging, sometimes fun, and fair, they will like you without you even having to worry about it.

7969 · Joined: 26 Mar 2003 Posts: 5782 Location: Coastal Guangdong

i think my students like me, because i just establish a friendly rapport with them. i dont berate them, i rarely punish anyone, and i carefully choose my words when discussing their country and its customs. plus, i make it known from the outset that we should be friends and learn from one another.

they also respect me, since i've been a soldier in the army, and this kind of service is something students in china seem to respect a lot. from this, they know i can be tough with them, if need be.

7969

tw · Joined: 04 Jun 2005 Posts: 3898

I have learned that being liked and being respected can co-exist, but difficult. You have to come across as being friendly and approachable enough for your students to like you, yet at the same time be strict and firm enough for them to respect you enough without fearing you and thus loathing you. I find that if I joke around and monkey around with the students a bit too much OUTSIDE classroom hours, they stop taking me serious enough to respect me. Chinese people don't understand Western humour, and they definitely don't seem to understand the concept just because a teacher likes joking around during breaks and after classes, he/she can still be a serious teacher when the bell rings.

Outsida · Posted: Thu Sep 07, 2006 3:29 pm Post subject:

Respected. You don't need to be friends with them. As long as they feel comfortable in your class and that they can learn something and you are approachable if they have any questions, then it's all good. Be firm with them, but be fair. Show understanding for their situations, but don't take any xit. Most "friendships" here are only skin deep anyway. When the final exam finishes, it'll be "Laoshi who?"

no_exit · Joined: 12 Oct 2004 Posts: 565 Location: Kunming

When I was in school, the teachers I liked and the teachers I respected tended to be one and the same. It is pretty hard for me to like someone if I don't respect them in at least some way. I would hope that my students feel the same way about me -- although, I'd agree that there has to be a pretty careful balance between the two.

grwit · Joined: 20 Apr 2006 Posts: 329 Location: Dagobah

I agree with no exit

I remember when I was at school I seemed to pay more attention and learn more from the teachers I liked.

The teachers who were strict I didn't really respect. I was more interested in trying to make them angry by breaking thier petty classroom rules than learning from them. (ok I admit I wasn't the most well behaved student)

The way I see it is there are 2 types of respect...
1. Respect through fear
2. Respect through friendship

I believe the second is the most valuable type of respect for teachers.

vikdk · Joined: 25 Jun 2003 Posts: 1676

It's something very much about students wanting to accept you as a role-model. If they like and respect you - the chances are they will want to be like you (taking on certain aspects of your role) - which can mean wanting to put greater effort into learning your lessons!!!!

evaforsure · Joined: 26 Jun 2004 Posts: 1217

Once a poster on this board told me a very profound statement when discussion this subject.

"There is a thin line between fear and respect."

Any guess as to which person currently posting on this board imparted this piece of wisdom to me.

THE WINNER SHOULD GET A PRIZE, BUT WILL NOT BECAUSE I AM BROKE