Job Discussion Forums

[eclectic]

#1. I am a 43 yr old US male and am looking to teach in Jakarta. I have a BA in english literature and am just now completing a 60-hr online tefl course with i-to-i who will then place me in a school in or around Jakarta for a salary of $860 per month with paid accomodations. IS THIS A GOOD SALARY AND SINCE MY RENT IS FREE, HOW MUCH ROUGHLY WOULD FOOD AND MISCELLANEOUS EXPENSES BE PER MONTH? I have no expensive habits and actually am looking to marry a Muslim woman there, as I have heard the vast majority of the people are Muslim. Can anyone please answer me? Thank you in advance.

[Henry_Cowell]

[eclectic]

Yes, I am intent on doing that, and also chose Indonesia because of what you said as well, among other things. But the $ situation is what I am now trying to analyze. I have a BA in English, what if I just show up in Jakarta and apply to the highest-paying language schools? I gather Indonesia is alot less strict about visas and college degrees, so would this strategy work, do you think? And can one get a job that pays atleast 8 million per month simply strolling in and applying?

[Llamalicious]

OK, OK, I'll bite.

The marry-a-muslim thing. Are you already a muslim? I sort of hope so, because that way your post is slightly less odd. Still seems strange to specify the religion of a putative bride-to-be and to have potential marrige as the main criterion for your job hunt, but, well, whatever.

If you're not a muslim, the post edges that bit closer to being disturbing. May I ask why? You know that, strictly speaking, people of different religions are not permitted to marry in Indonesia, so one of you would have to convert?

$860 is what, almost 8 million rupiah, so it's towards the lower end of the spectrum, but not tragic. You can eat cheaply for about $2 a day, though this will quickly become dull. (See? On topic.)

[ezekiel]

Llamalicious glad you said it cause I was just about to!

NEWBIE Questions: please don't laugh..don't think it was the questions about teaching that people are laughing at!
Something highly questionable about motives like these for teaching in Indonesia..

Muslims in Indonesia? No way, you're kidding!
tell us eclectic; do you have any other countries in mind if you can't find a wife here? The second biggest Muslim country in the world, perhaps? What criteria will you use to decide on a wife or is 'Muslim' their only requirement? Why are you not trying Pakistan or Saudi Arabia? Is it because they are far less tolerant of inter-faith marriage than Indonesia?
Perhaps someone has told you that it's easy to find a wife here? Are you Muslim, or are you, as Llamalicious said, willing to convert to Islam? Why not try a beautiful & charming Chinese Indonesian? Or a Christian?

I would be careful not to let any future employer in Indonesia know that you are coming here to find a wife, I doubt it will go down very well..I'm surprised you are willing to tell a load of strangers on an Internet forum either; especially one about teaching English..there are probably sites for this kind of thing you know..come to think of it, for a modest fee I could probably hook you up hahaha!

[ezekiel]

Oh, and back to teaching and the salary figure in question..Rp 8 million in Jakarta is not a great deal..I get a good deal more in a Sumateran provincial town.

[Henry_Cowell]

I'm sure that the wife will not be content to live on a salary of Rp 8 million for two people in Jakarta. Or will you be bringing your Muslim wife back to your country after you find her?

[eclectic]

well now Henry, Lama, and Zeke, I am sure glad you have picked quickly up on that, and evem more glad there is no malicious, sarcastic, disrespect in your quite reasonable if not mildly bemused queries of me. I will indeed answer you all with full respect and honesty. About 15 years ago I converted to Islam here in NYC, and have had a tough time finding a sincere Muslim here in the US, as most (if you dont believe me, come here for a quick look) have quickly donned western, tight, promiscuous jeans and blouses, and disregard even the hijab (head covering) rather quickly as well, unless under threat of severe parental punsihment, they merely throw it over the rather very backs of their heads, and then in that case gob on loads of cakeish or shall I say caulkish makeup just to spite those domineering parents, who can neither enforce in actuality Islamic dress codes here nor legally coerce their daughters for fear of the dear little liberated ones calling 911 and having their abusive parents jailed. Several 21-30 yr old "muslim" women were recently asked by the imam of the mosque I pray at to leave the mosque because of inappropriate dress. Etc, my good inquisitive fellows.

Therefore, having not exhausted the half of it, I decided last year to seek a Muslim wife in a country which does not largely allow its Muslim girls to wear skin tight jeans which ride quite closely up the crack of their behinds and skin tight blouses showing every aspect of their nipples in public, etc.

Why would I hide the fact on this board that I chose Indonesia as a potential place for both work and marriage? I am not ashamed of such an endeavor, as I am quite serious and well-intentioned about it.

[Henry_Cowell]

Thank you, eclectic.

The only thing now for you is to change your screen name. You are certainly not "eclectic" in the freedoms that you allow women -- or at least the women you consider worthy of you. If you were truly "eclectic," you'd choose your values from many different sources.

[eclectic]

I appreciate that feedback Henry. It is not, IMO, who is "worthy of me", as I am merely a creature of God's, and noone on earth should worry about being worthy of ME. Rather, I am striving to be worthy of God. And IMO, which is what ultimately counts for the way I live, as is YOUR opinion for the way YOU live, I find that promiscuously-dressed women (and, worse, promiscuously-behaved women) are not a appealing to me when I consider who may be my future wife and mother of my children. For their agenda is normally confined to getting as much ego-boosting sexual attention from men as possible.

I find it odd, then, that in order to be "eclectic" I must incorporate things which I find promiscuous, self-centered, audacious, and shameful.

Henry, we have done a great thing here, You and I, in that we have exchanged ideas without losing respect for one another OR for the decency of the dialogue....now THAT is rare nowadays!

[Henry_Cowell]

You will do well in Indonesia. There are tens of millions of men just like you. Good luck!

[drgonzo]

What you will find, however, is that for the most part Indonesia is a very relaxed form of Islam...
Many of the girls, even the ones wearing a jilbab, will still wear tight jeans, t-shirts, etc... and some will even have 'fun' on the first date.
If you are looking for a hard-core muslim woman, I am sure you can find one in Indonesia.... but it will take some looking for.
Why don't you go for a visit first? There might be better places in the world to go to find a hard-core muslim.

[laughing_magpie06]

eclectic, I don't wish to rain on your parade or smash your dreams but I have lived in Indonesia for a number of years now. I never came here to choose a specific wife from a religious point of view (I am an aetheist) but have dated and had relationships with muslim women in the past. Most I found were the best of liars I have seen from anywhere in the world. Yes they pretend to be holier than thou at home in the presence of their families but outside are as promiscuous as any western women and may dress modestly in muslim areas but take them to Bali or wherever and things change big time. An ex girlfriend of mine, who tried to convert me to islam, used to pretend to work outside of the city then shacked up with any guy she could get her hands on. That was okay by her but she still couldn't eat pork or touch dogs. Work that one out.
And you know, now I am happily married to a Chinese-Catholic lady who has none of the aforementioned problems that my previous gf's had.
So my advice? Marry a muslim (if that is very important to you) from maybe a middle eastern country or Pakistan perhaps. You will suffer less grief in the long term.

[treacle]

Perhaps northern Sumatra would be a better destination for the OP, given the fact that under Sharia law there women are regularly subjected to public humiliation as they are flogged for such 'crimes' as co-habiting a taxi with a man which they are not married to.

Tight jeans up cracks and pokey nipples shouldn't bother you up there eclectic.

Leave those for the rest of us to enjoy.

[ezekiel]

Ok, ok..It seemed odd at first but eclectic has explained his motives a little better and I, personally, respect that (at least it seems less odd than it did beforehand).
That considered, though, the other guys may be right, eclectic. You may indeed find that the form of Islam in Indonesia, unless it's in the kampung (villages), is approaching a similar level of moderation and modernization as that of Europe and the States.
In the end, your search for a wife will come down to the individual person and their character, which is the thing that's most important in a marriage anyway

Salam