Job Discussion Forums

[gaijinalways]

How good is your relationship with your boss at work?

I have several part-time jobs here in Japan, hence more than a few bosses. One boss in particular is an odd duck.

One time he was talking to another part-timer I know, and I dropped down at the same table, contributing a comment here and there in the background to their conversation. My boss invited this other part-timer to join him and a full timer for drinks after work. The part-timer turned him down, then departed. Now my boss turns to me, "Do you need something?"

I was a bit flabbergasted, and said, "No, nothing." He said, "Oh, you just came by to socialize?!"

Gotta wonder...............................

[jdl]

A good starting point when looking for explanantion of another's reaction is to analyze one's action. Anything there?

[Mexicobound]

[jdl]

Do you suspect your realtionship with your boss was damaged by your interaction? How can that be repaired?

[gaijinalways]

mexicobound posted

[jdl]

I have been very fortunate by many reports in that my bosses have been professional and skilled in various ways. The one who was beyond his depth was soon rescued and reassigned according to his ability. I have learned a great deal from my bosses...each a mentor in his/her own right even the one who found leadership a stretch too far.

'Seek first to understand then to be understood'

I generally expect to adapt to and enhance each new work environment and boss. In doing so I have found that the environment and boss are accepting of the talent I bring. I bring to the job the same person who was interviewed and was found worthy of employment. Synergy is always the goal.

[gaijinalways]

jdl,

I suspect you have been reading the same 'Dilbert' book as me, unless you really talk like that at work .

Where are you teaching now (or are you empowering learners )? It sounds like you have a good situation. A lot of my bosses are pretty good, but some are a bit... and I'm not talking about displaying mere favortism, I mean incompetance.

[jdl]

Stephen Covey and Will Rogers actually; maybe a little Mark Twain. Although Scott Adams does have his share of wisdom for the work place.

"Wherever we go there we are" so the location of the work place may be somewhat irrelevant. It may be more fruitful to ask oneself "What will I make of it?

Has to be a little confucius in there too....somewhere?

[spiral78]

I've had bosses From Hell in the past - it really seems that people who are good at self-promotion tend to rise a level (or more) beyond their competence. It can take excruciatingly long for this to become apparent to those who can take action.

My current boss is challenged by the fact that she's got no teaching background at all, and there are problems with our communicating exactly what it is that we DO (especially since we rarely actually teach language where I am ).

But the lady is highly civilized and seems to truly have the long-term best interests of the centre at heart, so I have some hope all will be well in the end (she's only been here a few months).

I wouldn't say she has favorites, exactly - but her style is to maintain an open door, and those of us who take advantage of that get more face time than the others. I'd maintain that that's fair enough - she welcomes everyone

[basiltherat]

Very interesting thread.
My current boss is a total nightmare; she has little confidence in her instructors, is totally unappreciative of the hard work we put in. We go the extra mile to help her when the rotation schedule goes pear-shaped by staying on to cover for the late arrival of incoming instructor. In fact, she's so 'knowledgeable' that she knows 'feck' all about what we actually do. I once walked into the head office after having been with the company (I work on a gas field) for 6 months and she didn't recognise me nor did she know my name or what I did. She thought I was some stranger walking into the office without permission. She's a hairdresser !
I have always believed that 'your boss can only be trusted to the extent that he / she trusts you'. Clearly, then, my current boss can in no way be regarded as trustworthy.

My previous boss - in Syria - by contrast was the best I've ever had. He left me alone to get on with the job and trusted me in all aspects of our agreement. He was competent and supported me in every way possibly. Very amicable, even when dropping by in the head office, he always had time to have me in for a chat (albeit short) and tea.
What a contrast !
best
basil

[gaijinalways]

It's a tough balance to swing. You want your boss ideally to exhibit some friendliness, but if he's overly friendly with only certain people, it's certainly not fair to whomever doesn't get any portion of that.

Actually the boss in question that I mentioned is nice in some ways, and he is certainly helpful with some things, but I just feel like he could do more. It is difficult though to deal with everything though, as we have a number of teachers in our department.

Yes, I have had the real devil bosses, and they certainly can raise your blood pressure. I think at the moment I'm okay, of course it could always be better. I could be the boss!

[jdl]

Good point gaijinalways. I wonder how instructors would respond to us if we were 'bosses' ? How would they want us to change to become better. I suppose students make similar comments about us now.

It is a tough balance as you say. I am sure Spiral's boss is seen as 'having favourites' because only certain people avail themselves of her open door.

Just as instructors attempt to meet the individual needs of students through differentiation of instruction and interaction should bosses interact to staff according to their individual needs and run the risk of 'playing favourites' with everyone?

Some instructors want to be left to their own means as instructors whereas others want to be guided moment to moment professionally and personally. How do we as instructors deal with students of similar need? Can our strategies be applied to effective 'bossdom'? I suppose we judge our bosses on how well they meet our needs just as students judge us on how well we meet theirs.

Missing in the discussion is 'how well we meet our own needs' in our assigned roles (boss/instructor/student) without being so centric as to create islands.

[fladude]

Everybody is different. The real question is "is the favoritism affecting your income?"

If the answer is yes, then it's an issue.

If the answer is no, then it's really not an issue.

Personally speaking, I'm the sort of person who makes few friends in real life. I might well invite one person to go drinking but exclude others. I would still treat everyone equally in terms of pay. But I might not want to hang out.

[Justin Trullinger]

Interesting. Through a series of coincidences that nobody would have really anticipated, I became the boss five years ago.

From my various previous teaching jobs, I can say that I've had a variety of bosses, from those who were social with everybody to those who I would have rather eaten my spleen than be social with.

And now, I am the boss. It's hard. I maintain an open door policy, and try to sit down and talk with all the teachers who work for me at least once a week. (Numbers are a little down due to the economy, so it's getting easier to do!) Everybody needs something a little different out of these contacts, though. Some need encouragement, some a little levity. Some need me to reach out a little socially as they're having trouble integrating.

I try to support my team however I can- but sometimes it's just HARD. I don't know your boss. Maybe he's really a *beep* and really playing favourites. But maybe he just fell short. Had other stuff on his mind, reacted without thinking, or didn't mean what you thought he meant.

It could sure happen to me.


Best,
Justin

[spiral78]

Everybody is different. The real question is "is the favoritism affecting your income?"
If the answer is yes, then it's an issue.
If the answer is no, then it's really not an issue

Hmm, you're right - everyone IS different. For me, it's not just my income. It's also got a lot to do with opportunites for professional development, continuing education, job satisfaction...and job security.

My manager is talking 'temporary tightening' in terms of remuneration - but backing me in a major course development project that has some exciting future applications. I'm not entirely unhappy by any means