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[OleLarssen]

The turning of my second year here in Costa Rica coincides oddly with my 300th post here on the forums. So I'll write down some of my impressions and experiences from my stay here for people to read. It's pretty haphazard, off the top of my head stuff, but perhaps there is some germ of wisdom here, if you look carefully.

I would happily recommend anyone with a minimum of independence and self-drive to come here. It's a nice country with excellent people. Even though San Jose is much bedeviled, I've never found it quite as bad as the naysayers would have it. Sure, it's dirty and noisy, but that's true for most major cities in third world countries. The bus system is eccentric but generally well-functioning, and now they are even (supposedly!) setting up a decent train system between San Jose, Heredia and Alajuela, which, if done properly, will do miracles to the traffic in this city.

As a European with some Spanish, after the initial few months I never found it particularly challenging to navigate the city, even after dark. Ticos are friendly and helpful (especially to foreigners with some manners), and they would never let you enter a dangerous area without warning you severely first. There is a lot of different work available and some locals with excellent English to help you learn Spanish, which I strongly recommend people to do. Read up on the history of the country and the area and you will find that even relatively culture-less Costa Rica has a lot to give.

I'm considering this city - San Jose - more and more my home and it is becoming difficult to see why I should leave. Ticos are pretty hard to befriend in the sense that I know it from Norway (my home country), because it appears that the concept of 'friend' is very different here than what I'm used to. Exactly what is the difference is hard to put the finger on. I would say maybe it's as they write in the Moon handbook of this country - it's family first, always. However, I know of foreigners that have gotten solid Tico friends. There are many more friendships that I know of internally with the expats. And there's a lot of them. Expats, I mean. They have overrun parts of Escazu, Los Yoses and San Pedro, but you can still find mostly Tico neighborhoods (and Nica, but you generally don't want to go there) that are incredibly nice. I live in a fantastic part of Sabana Sur - many foreigners, but few Americans.

There has been a lot said about the dangers of San Jose, and it is dangerous, no mistake. But it's like anywhere else - as long as you know where you are and where you're going it's pretty easy to avoid the bad areas, and even navigating downtown San Jose on foot, after dark, is pretty low risk - again, if you know where you're going and where you are. Yes, you risk getting mugged almost anywhere you go and whatever you do, and whatever time - theoretically, and as in all other cities on the planet. Deal with it. Keep your eyes open and your wits about you and, like me, you won't run into even a hint of trouble as time passes.

Tico culture... people have said that I'm in a unique position to say something about it since I have a degree in anthropology and a front-row view. My girlfriend is Tica and I'm pretty close to her family. Whether I can say anything useful I don't know. But it is different here, in a deep, powerful way. It's very strange to be around people who have ideas and behavior that we the "civilized West" outgrew a hundred years ago. The confusion becomes compounded by the outward appearance of San Jose, which gives off the impression to be quite modern. I think it is perhaps for this reason a lot of people find themselves thrown off balance by a lot of things, such as Tico time. They don't expect it because they assume the relatively modern appearance of San Jose (and touristy parts of Costa Rica) goes more than skin deep. It doesn't. Not even close. This is a deeply Catholic country (yes, even today), with archaic sexual identities where family - the really big family - seems to be the primary motor of identification and the lens through much of Tico life is perceived. This is not to say that there aren't plenty of excellent Ticos. There are, as my girlfriend stands testament of. John Hall, who was a regular on this forum, is, as far as I recall, married to a Tica and though I've never met her, I don't imagine she is the do-the-dishes-take-care-of-the-babies type of person. There are plenty of people here with approaches to life that are very similar to US/north European Anglo-Saxon culture. They are not the majority though - not by a long shot. If you come here looking for a Tica or Tico (which I didn't, but it happened anyway), be prepared to deal with bizarre customs and norms that will truly rock your world no matter how well-balanced you are. The only possible cure that I can think of is fluency in Spanish, which might offer you a level of protection that I never had against the eccentricities of my girlfriend's family. They are delightful people, but also have ideas and ways of doing things that are straight out of books from the 17th century. So, people, don't be deceived - this is a third world country and it is very, very different from your middle-class background in the States or northern Europe. Come here knowing that, and maybe it will be easier to adjust.

I might come off as complaining, and while I've had my share of frustrations in Costa Rica my overall impression of the country and experience with it is overwhelmingly positive. There's a lot to both be had from this country and, perhaps more importantly, so much you as a foreigner can do and give to Costa Rica. If you come here, please contribute as well as take - there's a million things you can do and they don't all involve monetary aid. Your knowledge of photography, painting, construction, dance, Latin (OK, maybe not Latin) - anything at all - this knowledge can be put to great use in workshops. Teaching English helps a lot. Teaching German and French is also a great aid. Learn Spanish, give back as much as you can or dare, and I think you will find a country that can both take and give - and find an incredible experience.

[holdenshope]

thanks! really nice to read some first-hand observations!

[ottoman79]

nice post, thank you very much for the first hand account.

[gharwell1]

I was married to a Tica about 20 years ago. She tried to poison me by putting Glass, A straight pin and staples in my food. She looked like she came out of a fashion magazine but was nasty as a rattle snake (started one month after we got married.)

[OleLarssen]

My girlfriend hasn't tried to poison me yet, to my knowledge. I'm not rich or particularly successful so if she's a gold digger she's digging in the wrong hole. :)