Job Discussion Forums

[kahilm]

So, I've been in Tokyo for about 13 months teaching at a big eikaiwa. The job was awful at first but now I've gotten used to it. Of course it's not the greatest place in the world to work... but it allows me to live in Japan and I make enough money to enjoy it a bit.

I just turned 25 and I graduated university right before I came over here, so this is my first "real" job. I studied Japanese a bit in university, came here and partied too much and forgot a lot. Now I'm studying for the JLPT 3-kyuu in December.

I have a couple of foreigner friends here, but not many. I've dated a few Japanese women and I have a kinda-steady girlfriend right now.

Now the point of the post: I've recently started to feel lost. It's not really homesickness, I don't think. It's not really loneliness. Maybe it's just concern about the future. I want to study Japanese more, but at the rate I'm going it'll take 3 or 4 years to become anything approaching fluent. I can't do the eikaiwa thing forever. To be honest, I don't even think I want teaching to be my career. Moving back home to New York is frightening because many of my friends and family are complaining about the job market.

Maybe the best thing to do is to set a goal, right? But it's difficult when I can't figure out what I want my goal to be. So, I'm a bit lost. Anyone else ever get into this sort of funk? What's the next step? Did I just describe every other young eikaiwa instructor here, or am I in the minority?

[fluffyhamster]

Start looking for other jobs (in TEFL at least) - chain eikaiwa teaching sounds like it can become stale pretty quick - but just be aware that it can take a fair while/contacts/luck/a number of changes of employer to land a more rewarding teaching job, and that your present job is probably still one of the more secure, better and attainable ones around in TEFL (I'm assuming that you have at most a CELTA or equivalent). Anyway, good luck with the Japanese, and here's to hoping that it opens further doors for you.

[Glenski]

Sounds like you're experiencing a perfectly normal part of culture shock. Accept that, and you're halfway out.

Making Japanese friends is not easy. They are superficial for a long time, and since this usually varies with what westerners want/have, it can make relationships difficult.

Learning the language will take 3-4 years, minimum! So, don't fret over that. The most difficult part is the self-discipline that so many people lack. Set aside precise times every week, set goals, and find a tutor. It'll get better.

Eikaiwa is not a career for long-term work. You've experienced some of it, and if you can find a better eikaiwa for the next year or so, it might make you feel differently. Join the ETJ group in your area. Join JALT. Network and feel more part of a crowd of teachers instead of just you going it alone.

[AgentMulderUK]

Sounds to me like you are experiencing a perfectly normal part of growing older.

And consider this: If you had a totally contented life, why'd ya leave home and go to Japan in the first place?

Did you bring some of those feelings with you, but put them on a back-burner as the newness of it all distracted you at first, but now it's worn off...

Edit: To answer your question, yes I have had those feelings. Actually I have had them for years, no matter where I am.

[GambateBingBangBOOM]

I agree with Glenski that it could be culture fatigue (aka culture shock).

As for figuring out a career goal, there are free personality tests on the internet that you can do, and then look to see what kinds of careers most often fit someone with the type of personality that you have. But don't just stop at that and decide that you HAVE to do one of those things. You don't. You can also look at related types for possible ideas (free tests online may not be totally accurate- you are answering what you think of yourself, like what kind of person you actually are, and a surprising number of people never actually do that and so it's better to do a bunch of them over a period of time and if you are ALWAYS getting the same result regardless of how you feel, then that's probably where you fall in their little divisions). Also, look at the OPPOSITE side and see if the career areas there are definitely things you wouldn't want to be doing.

A good thing to do is just get a notebook and a folder and start writing things down- the types of things you've done in the past (include every course you ever took in university and which ones you actually liked). You can also start researching a tonne of different career areas on-line. It's a slow process, but probably it should be. Whatever you choose to do will likely be a slow process as well (learning how to do it, getting a job, moving up, stability...)

http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp
Myers Brigg type of test. There are others as well.

You just answer the yes/no questions, and it will spit out a result. Then the best thing to do is probably plug that into google ("INFP careers" or "INFP personality profile" etc). There is actually a lot of information out there for free.

Look into "What Color is your Parachute" type books as well.

ETA: I realize that you weren't necessarily referring to a career goal when you wrote about goals in the original post, but I think you may see that if you go through and do all these things 1. It will take quite a long time but more importantly 2. When you find something that you really want to do, you will probably want to do it right away and suddenly everything will change for you. That's what happened for me, anyway.

[Vince]

I rode that roller coaster for a few years. Most of it had to do with being unclear about my professional direction, which was really about my sense of long-term stability.

I dealt with the periods of funk by writing a to-do list of what I needed to do. The lists usually weren't about getting directly to my end point, but about taking steps to choose an endpoint or a few possible endpoints. Each endpoint would have a sublist of what I needed to do to develop toward that particular endpoint.

[TokyoLiz]

Lots of good advice here. Glenski, Mulder et al. suggested that what you're feeling is culture shock and growing up. Your timing is interesting, coming to Japan at a transition in your life, from student to real adult life.

The MBTI is a test that identifies your strengths and preferences. Also I suggest you look at

The Occupational Outlook Handbook http://www.bls.gov/OCO/

Canadians reading this can see http://www.jobfutures.ca/noc/browse-occupations-alphabet.shtml

Meanwhile, you're here in Japan. Your post indicated you are interested in Japanese language. There are so many Japanese language programs available in Tokyo. Here's a place to start http://www.aikgroup.co.jp/j-school/english/area/section/tokyo.htm

Some people are natural learners. You might consider a hobby, sport or traditional activity to help you learn Japanese. One of the keys to staying happy and healthy in a new country is finding outlets for your energy, be that active or creative, and connecting with people through social groups, hobbies, sports. I've been studying martial arts for 6 years here, speak and read Japanese.

[kahilm]

Thanks for all the informative replies. I appreciate it.

Of course, I still don't know what I'm going to do. I'll probably start looking for ALT jobs that start in April. I imagine the hours would make having a semi-normal life here easier. It's difficult to have hobbies and/or meet new people when you work from 1pm-10pm, I think. I'll continue to study Japanese.

[AgentMulderUK]

I would also add this:

The whole eikawa/alt thing is not what you will be doing all your life.
I know this sounds obvious but when you are grinding through daily
lessons it's easy feel that this is your final place in the food chain.

I also lost sight of that , many a time, and had to slap myself.

It is just a stepping stone to better and brighter things. And that takes time, on a scale measured in years. None of this is intended to sound patronising, so sorry if it does...

If you really want to stay here, give it time, which in turn will bring you opportunities that you cannot foresee right now.

I think all the "symptoms" you describe could be applied to a young person that moved within your own country. Imagine, the immediate support network of family&friends has gone (or is remote). working unsocial hours to pay bills, to live someplace they are not sure of.

Career goals are wise, but not as important as all that. Goals change, we change. It is not unusual now for people to make drastic career shifts in their forties. So even if you worked in Japan for 15 years, what the heck.

Meh, I sound like an old git. Probably because I am one...how did that happen? :p

Take it easy, hang in there. All will be well.

[dove]

Slaves to the corporate grind in the USA also feel lost. I really think the key is to enjoy the hell out of the time you are not at work. There are so many things going on in Japan, so many things to explore....google Tokyo Meetup and you will see all that there is a lot going on. Everyone feels lost at some point. But being lost is the perfect occasion to begin the search.

[TokyoLiz]

Agent Mulder hit the nail on the head - in Japan your plans will happen very slowly, but if you have the gaman, the endurance, the rewards can be satisfying. This slow movement is a fact of Japanese beaurocracy, job market conditions and people's attitudes and expectations.

As long as you're patient, and don't get cranky abou it.

To the OP, yes, do get out of eikaiwa within the first year, jump off into ALT work, and get going.

Look around - some of the Japanese schools offer part time study, too. The list I sent you may be geared towards full time day students. However, Shinjuku and Shibuya have many schools offering part time and evening study. Some schools offer free trial lessons.

[G Cthulhu]

Lots of interesting advice (even though I would disagree with the detail of some of it) here for the OP.

Just to repeat the chorus: the feeling lost thing could well be a combination of culture shock/fatigue and the typical mid-20's whatthehellhappensnext phase. Or, you could be going insane. Either way, don't fret about the lost feeling itself. Take that as an example and reminder that you are telling yourself that you need some sort of change, whatever you might identify that as being.

In terms of career, I wouldn't bother with the Myres Briggs tests unless you like a laugh. They're statistically & psychologically meaningless. Lots of other online tests out there that can assess personality and interests. A quick search through google on 'interest inventory tests' will bring up some good results. But before that, do you *want* a "career" and all that that entails? Ask yourself where you want to be in 5, 10 and 30 years. Why do you want to be there? What are the stepping points to those endpoints? Why is English such an annoying language, and why can't Americans make decent hamburgers or come up with a national election system that is actually democratic? Lots of deep philosophical truths to think about. The hamburger one is the most important one though.

Good luck, and remember, if you decide that going insane is simply the easiest option, it always pays to go out in style.

[southofreality]

Nothing wrong with being lost, IMO. The feeling that you have to live up to some standard set by those who've wandered the earth before you could be causing you to feel this way.

Now, if you wake up feeling that something needs to change, well then, by all means, make a change. However, you're 25... you've got time. But don't get lazy; keep an eye on the future and keep thinking about what you really want. But, don't let your emotions cause you to make a big decision before you've really thought about what's best for you at this point in time.

Patience and careful consideration are the keys.

[Vince]

Southofreality makes a good point. Many of us go through a period of tension between what our heart tells us to do and what society's stereotypes urge us to do. Here's an interesting article that I just read for a management course assignment, and the class agreed that it was a breath of fresh air:

http://appreciativeinquiry.case.edu/uploads/ChosingaPathwithHeart.pdf

[kahilm]

It's been just over a year so I figured I'd post an update.

I passed 3-kyu in December, quit my eikaiwa job in late February, and got picked up by Interac to teach at a few elementary schools around Tokyo in April. Loved the kids but didn't care for the company and their methods along with the JETs not helping at all with the classes. The JETs themselves were nice enough people (most of them), but of course they couldn't speak English and I was expected to plan and teach every lesson by myself even though I was under the impression that I would be the assistant teacher.

Long story short, I started to have anxiety issues and decided my mental health was at risk so unfortunately I left after only a month. Decided to return to the States for the time being.

Spent the summer sending out resumes, catching up with friends and family, and adjusting to the States. A few interviews but no offers.

Took the Customs Broker License exam last week after spending about a month studying. I'll be starting work at my family's international freight forwarding company within the next couple of weeks. Not exactly where I wanted to be, but seeing as I can't find work elsewhere, I don't have many choices and my savings are dwindling.

And almost everyday I wish I could return to Japan. I think my unofficial plan right now is to work for a couple of years in the States, save some funds, and then go back to study at a language school.

The hardest part is the long distance relationship I'm trying to keep going...

Anyway, there wasn't much of a point to this post. Or maybe the point is that I'm still pretty lost but so what?