Job Discussion Forums

[Hansen]

I had been living comfortably in a flat when, suddenly and unexpectedly, alot of noise started coming down from above. The flat above had been empty for a long time. Suddenly, I was being awakened constantly and subjected to very annoying and irritating noise, big noise, from above.

A new couple had moved in. After consulting with friends, I started tapping on the ceiling when the noise was too much. No result; consequently, I started rapping the ceiling. Unfortunately, the people upstairs started stomping on the floor. Awakened from a sound sleep, I shot out the door with a shovel handle in my hand and started beating on the door of my upstairs neighbor.

I was surprised to discover it was a colleague from school with whom I had a nodding acquaintance.. After a brief discussion and apology , I thought the matter had been resolved. I decided to move to another flat.

Although he really had nothing to do with managing my affairs, he managed to become responsible for hooking up my new phone. He sat on it for a month, did nothing. The FAO told me that since he had to work with the guy and it was really a dispute between us, he could not get involved. He did tell me that the guy had told him about our episode and was not going to hook up my phone [simply from spite].

I went to my department head, told him what had happened, and said he needed to arrange coverage for my classes, which I would not be attending until the phone was fixed.

He contacted the school principal and my phone was working the next day.

[A man called Roger]

[Hansen]

Unfortunate Roger, that you often assume the worst of people. I had been upstairs. By this time, I had been about three weeks without a decent night's rest. As stated in the post, on this particular occasion, I had been awakened out of a sound sleep that I had managed to catch during the hours when most people are not asleep. The point being that it had become impossible to sleep in the place at anytime, without being awakened.

Of course, rather than assuming the best of people, you assume, like the xiaoren of Confucius, the worst.

If you weren't so intent on criticizing other people, you might have noticed numerous factors which indicated an escalating situation, no doubt in part because of weeks of sleep deprivation on my end as well as my unfamiliarity with the poorly constructed place in which I live.

Hopefully, in view of the entire scenario, including the vengeance directed toward me over a situation which I thought had been resolved, others might gain some insight.

Even though I moved from a place I had been in for nearly two years so as to avoid further problems, the "gentleman" still made a point of messing with my living situation to the extent that the school principal was required to intervene. My contract was intentionally violated by a person to settle a petty score. Numerous administrators knew it and would do nothing.

Perhaps another FT can learn from my experience.

[A man called Roger]

[jiangsu]

I thought it was quite a funny story.

As someone who has had to put up with bad neighbours, I can appreciate some of the apparently less rational aspects of Hansen's backlash

[Hansen]

Roger, While I don't believe you to be a stupid person, you are, after your time here, definitely manifesting characteristics of the dreaded xiaoren. I suppose it is more character flaw, than mental incapacity, on your part, which causes you to miss the obvious response to your own criticism.

Good luck with that.

[mat chen]

I'm with Roger on this one. Noisy neighbors everwhere and we are headed into the fireworks season. Remember last year's spat Brian had with his neighbors. BS protectors work for me with Rolling Stone's songs pumped up full blast.
Also the official way of showing anger in China is a meat cleaver not a shovel.

[A man called Roger]

[alter ego]

Let's break this down one paragraph at a time.

[The Ever-changing Cleric]

thats good advice

[Hansen]

I didn't post this in hope of vindication. It's obvious that I lost my temper and acted inappropriately. I apologized to the person and, rather than have an ongoing quarrel, since the noise issue had been going on for months, moved to another flat.

Rather than write a long, detailed narrative, I simply tried to post the high points here Obviously not among friends, nor at the school, there are numerous details I might add to correct the erroneous conclusions certain individuals have reached.

What I had hoped to illustrate, for the benefit of others, was the respose of the individual. He would not let it go, as the inappropriate behavior of a foreigner in what had become a difficult environment.

His way of "getting even" was to mess with my telephone.

While this particular incident may be disgusting to most of you, there may be some, such as myself, who incline to inappropriate forms of conflict resolution and/ or confrontation. Simply be aware that these things don't play out as in western countries.

[A man called Roger]

[Hansen]

"For the victim of 'Shovel handle threat' to only go as far as mess with the perpetrators telephone would seem an extremely civilized and thinking form of retribution"

Yes, that's true from your point of view. Other people, who look at things more from other perspectives including a professional one, would have realized that the matter need not/should not be carried into the workplace; however, bringing it into the workplace was exactly the sneaky, duplicitous, backstabbing behavior in which certain types of Asian people specialize.

I was shocked to the bone when I experienced this approach from Asians in the workplace in the States. Still shocks me. Confrontation, directness, identifying a problem and resolving it I understand. Conniving, subterfuge, avoidance, are things with which I struggle.

Those who are more comfortable with the latter deserve whatever %&#* comes their way.

[The Ever-changing Cleric]

[Hansen]

Thanks for clearing this up guys. I'm shore glad I still have my job. I went to the principal of the school about the living situation, explained the problem, and asked for a solution. He offered me 1000RMB/monthly toward a new flat.

Deep down inside, I believe that violence is a useful coping mechanism. Years ago, when facing some difficulties I could not control, I put a beating on a guy, twice. He took a strong dislike to me, threatened me, and came at me. The first time, he literally stalked me across a room. When I couldn't back up any more. I caught him with a solid kick to the *beep*. He crumpled like a paper bag. Had I really stomped him good when he was down, instead of walking away, he wouldn't have been back.

Round two: Later, after he recovered, he came back to "git sum mo." Result was the same but the approach different. He surprised me and quickly rushed me. When the dust cleared, he was across the hall, on the floor, stunned. Boy, that felt good. Later, I was exhilirated. More useful that a psychiatrist, counsellor, alcohol, and so forth.

Yes, I am a bad, evil man. So are you. We're just different bad evil. I sleep well at night, however. No doubt the wudang sword routines I love plus the long handled broad knife, contribute to a good night's rest.